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Kristel and Jack, 22 y.o.
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms Kristel and Jack
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Run. Don’t walk. Run.
If a woman did that to me she's out with no hesitation
Even when married, it’s hard for people who have this type of sexual trauma to just flip a switch and fully except sex, if for many years they have been told that they will be unclean or are used goods if they have sex.
Both you and your girlfriend should go to a therapist and talk about this. If you are planning on getting married, you need to be prepared for things not to be simple and easy in this department.
Thank you so much for your gracious comment. I appreciate your honesty without chastising 🙂
Dude dump him. This is absurd. He’s a child.
His wife is brunette, it honestly could be hers. Not all of my hair is the same color.
YOUR DUMB FOR CONSIDERING THIS. Dude, come on, you must know better.
Good for you OP! I'm proud of you
You need to grow a thicker skin if you’re going to pursue a relationship with such a massive age gap and a 13 year old stepdaughter.
As a stepmother myself I feel for you, it’s hard at the best of times. But I kinda wonder what you were expecting? These comments are actually pretty mild compared to what a lot of stepparents get!
If you're jealous & very possessive, not really your bag, then. I know people who swing who are mature and aware, and still have to struggle with jealousy. In the end, whether it makes things better or worse depends entirely on the couple.
No. Not my thing.
Would you do it though?
So every argument revolves around what you're doing wrong and what you need to do to improve? Let me guess, it never goes the other way. It's not healthy to have a one-sided relationship where you're doe-eyed with infatuation. You describe defending yourself from false claims in an argument as a “bad habit.” What? You're obsessing over a girl that treated you like shit, continues to treat you like shit, and is now asking you to sit on the back burner while she shops around for someone else.
I don't care how mean this sounds, but you need to hear it: move on and stop treating life like a Hallmark movie. I know that the happy moments in the relationship feel amazing, but that's just the sauce. The meat of a relationship is how the normal day to day goes. She was blowing up at you with false accusations and hurtful statements, threatening to leave then running back, and when you stuck up for yourself, she called you a bad listener. Is that who you want to marry? You want to spend every day getting nagged and screamed at? My parents are like this. My dad is miserable. He spends every moment being ordered around like a dog and listening to rants about all of his flaws. He criticizes my mother once? She's crying about how he's evil abuser. I know how this shit goes man. It's only going to get worse. Move on.
My guy, this is why guys get a bad rap. No means no. If you can't accept that move on another woman that will say yes. Don't try and pressure her into something she doesn't want, and likely isn't ready for, just become you want to have sex.
Sounds like you really care about her. Couples therapy would be a good option to explore. She definitely has an unhealthy insecurity about this. There might be a better happy medium that doesn’t have you feeling guilty.
If she wants to wait and you don't, there isn't much to do here : You need to be with someone who share your views, and she need to be with someone who does it for her.
If you feel like you can wait until she's ready that would be great, but you need to stop asking for sex or offer sex then. She told you that she didn't want to do it and she told you why : She will tell you when she's ready, it's not like she'll forget if you don't remind her that most couple have sex.
If you feel like you can't wait and it's too much for you, you need to tell her and break up if you two can't find a solution that isn't good for both of you.
That would be a red flag for me
That’s bizarre. Education is an end in itself.
i hear what you are saying. and i tried before to move on until i saw their picture. but it hurts so much that i never got closure and never knew the real reason.. maybe i would hear something that hurt but at least i wouldnt feel so stupid for not knowing if his feelings were real at any point or made a fool of myself giving so much love to him ?
Thank you, I really should. I think I'll bring it up with him next time I see him. I feel like each time I keep thinking that the next time I see him, things will feel or will just be better but every time it's always the same or even worse. I don't feel connected in the same way anymore. But I should tell him that and tell him I want to spend more time with him and such.
It does seem strange to me as well and I get why you feel like he's giving you some pretty mixed signals.
What was his reason for ending things? There might be a clue there.
You could also try asking him why he acted that way right after breaking up with you. But please don't cling to the hope that he will come back no matter what his reasoning was for being so affectionate.
it wasn’t an issue then and it still isn’t now
Wow. Apparently you cheated? If she’d been there it wouldn’t have happened? You have no integrity. You did agreed to LDR. During the 2 days she visited, everything was great. You cheated. Now you’re blaming her. Not good.
Divorce and run ?♀️seriously wtf….
Leave him a message to drop off your stuff (at work or whatever).Let him know you just want your stuff, you don't want to speak to him. Once you have your things back, you block him.
Wow. A 3 month long vacation and you spend the day doing chores and she's angry that a t-shirt she wears to be gets stained by a dress that ran?
Just so you know, Gottman the psychologist that does research on marriages has studied 30,000 couples for over 40 years and can predict which ones will divorce. The behaviors that are indicators which he calls the Four Horsemen, are Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling.
I would get this problem ironed out before marrying her.
She sounds awful
You feel inferior to her because she had more sexual experiences than you did at the same age? I think you need to look at why you equate “more experience” to “better.” She isn't “better” than you for having more experiences and you aren't “less” than her for having fewer. It isn't a competition, and it's not healthy to be looking at it that way. The fact that you're dwelling on the specifics of her sexual experiences from a DECADE plus ago is absurd.
I get that. I had mine at 37 and 39. But. Meeting someone and establishing a relationship takes time. A lot has to happen before considering kids so I think it’s fair to say he would at least consider that it would probably be more difficult at her age.
The problem is the lying. If she admitted to it right away I wouldn’t have felt it was as bad but her denying it multiple times. At minimum you need to call off engagement.
I said I was all in… I don’t feel all in, I lied.
When he brought having a family up I would tell him I’m on board but I feel like I’m lying to myself
sounds like you are lying to yourself right now.
You stand up for yourself and once she is sober, you tell her that you are in a monogamous relationship and it will stay that way. For the intermediate term, no contact with this “brother” of hers. And if her desire is to sabotage what you have, then all she has to do is bring this up one more time and she will succeed.
I feared this answer. Maybe because I know it is the right thing to do. Morally I don't want to be responsible for a breakup. Although I don't think she would be in danger. They don't share an appartment and she lives with a (female) roommate. But then again, I don't know him outside of what she told me.
People’s upbringing has more of an impact on them than we realize. I grew up poor and with addiction. My life is the opposite of that but I learned coping behaviors that both served and held me back. The more toxic ones came out in time of stress. The fact that she didn’t tell you about this before hand is a sign that she’s good at avoiding difficult subjects. She will also have learned to ignore things out of necessity, in this case a mess. These will become big issues of not addressed.
You are allowed to decide what you want in your life. I had people reject me when I was younger because of my home situation. It was hurtful at the time but after a lot of self work I now see how people who has their shit together wouldn’t have wanted that family drama in their lives.
If you don't feel safe to talk to him, then don't. Plan to leave him in a way that makes you feel safe, move out your important documents and precious things to a safe place first.
An open relationship, but wanting a marriage? Sorry, that sounds like oil and water.
Who wanted to open the relationship originally, or was it mutual?
Either way, it sounds like you have had a change of heart considering you are calling another woman a “b*tch” through this post but yet she is probably under the assumption that he's in an open relationship which wait HE IS!!
Yet you aren't calling him in any names
Lol he can't change the locks, it's a rental. And his parents would never let him do that anyway
Don't tell him…just break up…he doesn't deserve an explanation. Never be someone's second best
You deserve so much better than being left aside to be a backup plan, because that's what he's doing to you. Leave him on your past, you deserve so much better than him, you deserve to be a priority, don't settle for someone that would chase other women after giving him everything for 2 years.
Thankyou yeah i’m slowly realising this is NOT the way haha ??
Thankyou yeah i’m slowly realising this is NOT the way haha ??
Thankyou yeah i’m slowly realising this is NOT the way haha ??
Girl, call off the engagement. He doesn’t think you’re cheating, if he’s not projecting (and in my experience any person who accuses their partner of that kind of behaviour out of the blue IS projecting) then he’s doing his best to manipulate and abuse you so that he can control everything you do. He WILL escalate, he will start to find other things you are doing “wrong” that he can use to excuse his behaviour. Nothing you ever do will be good enough, or will ever be enough to earn his trust because he doesn’t want you to be good enough or to be trustworthy, he wants to be able to do whatever he wants and not have you question it ever.
How many people were you with?
This is a very common way for (more commonly) women to cheat and if it doesn't work out, get back with you. Here is what you should do, kick her to the curb for good.
You process this by dumpling this abuser.
UTI aren’t gross. If he thinks that he isn’t mature enough to be having sex.
I tried to play chess on speed once, it got weird after the rooks flew away and the bishops started the Spanish inquisition…