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I've come to find that people who have children are actually the excessively selfish ones. It's understandable have dependents they need to care for so they hog resources and try to control the narrative around them to 'protect' their children.
It's when they start using the children as excuses to manipulate outside parties/individuals' behaviors is super annoying…
Kinda like how OP is using her emotions to black mail OP during sex, he has to agree with her narrative or they won't reach climax. She's being incredibly selfish by attempting to change a gut reaction, and she'll hold it against OP if he ever blossoms resentment. It's like she's loading the gun and holding it to his head. It seems like she's reckless, comfortable in making a demand out of a life altering event that requires both parties.
OP is rationalizing it now because she was allowed to play the long game for 6 months. OP probably has like Stockholm syndrome because of her selfish antics.