I [27 M] am considering breaking up with my gf [23 F] and the reason why is making me feel like the worst person in the world

My gf (call her Lucy) and I have been dating for approximately 3.5 years at this point. We have lived together for 2.5 of those years. In August of last year, we moved from where we met to somewhere 4 hours away, back to my hometown so that I could go back to school. We were starting to get more serious, and I wanted to make enough money to give her the life she deserved (we both want a small 5 acre farm)

I gave her the option of staying with her family for a year while I went to school, so that she wouldn’t be removed from her support network, but she insisted she wanted to come with me, so we moved together.

Shortly after the move, we went on vacation 1,000 miles away, and while on vacation she had a psychotic break from reality. I’ll spare you some of the details, but essentially she thought she knew everyone she saw on the street, thinking random people were old enemies from her childhood. She would climb out the window at night instead of using the door and go sleep in the rain or go walking in the lake (she can’t swim)

Needless to say, this was terrifying for me, but she didn’t think anything was strange about her behavior.

I called her stepmom and told her about the situation, and sm said it reminded her of Lucy’s brother, Luigi. Luigi has diagnosed schizophrenia. Their biological mother has bipolar disorder. A great aunt also has schizophrenia.

I already knew about Luigi, but the other two were news to me. I had previously asked Lucy if she’d be willing to be evaluated for mental illnesses, but she said she never wanted to know.

Anyway, I obviously cut our vacation short and flew with Lucy back to her family. I made this decision in conjunction with her sm because she’d already had experience with this sort of thing, works in the medical field, and had the support network necessary for this.

Lucy was in full-blown psychosis for approximately 3 months, escaping from the hospital and her sm’s house a number of times, but always found again. She’s been “normal” now since January, and is wanting to come move back to me soon, but I’m getting cold feet.

I don’t know if I can on-line my life always wondering if tomorrow, my partner is going to fully be there, or if I’ll wake up to find that she’s been running out into the forest for hours and is never found again.

But on the other hand, this feels super scummy to me to even have these thoughts. Isn’t this basically like breaking up with someone because they got cancer? I don’t know what to do. Either choice feels like the wrong moral decision. I can’t be in a relationship that is this taxing on my mental health, but I also can’t break up with someone for something well outside their control.

TLDR; gf suffered a mental breakdown and I don’t know how to proceed.

What should I do?

Edit: I didn’t explain myself very well. I’m sorry about that. I asked her if she’d be willing to be evaluated earlier in our relationship.

At first, during the peak of her psychosis, she was extremely unwilling to take any meds or meet with a therapist or psychiatrist. The last few months, however, she’s been diligently taking her anxiety meds and meeting with her therapist (biweekly) and psychiatrist (monthly).

She is cooperative on that front, but she has also been very clear she doesn’t permanently want to take medication. Which, I understand that, on some level, but it makes me very nervous at the same time.

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