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1. Nein, also er ist wirklich einer see entspanntesten und lustigsten Leute überhaupt. Er hat sich schon sehr unter Kontrolle, wir hatten halt ab und zu mal auch kleine Streits, aber da war jetzt nur was, wo Ich mir gedacht habe red flag.

   Wir haben halt auch unterschiedliche Umfelder, ich habe einen relativ großen Freundeskreis und nehme viel am Unileben teil und er ist eher so mit seiner Familie und den ganzen Leuten da

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2. That’s weird as fuck, and it makes me think something is wrong with her…. But idk what you can actually do about it. Maybe try and find skeletons in her closet? You can’t for bid him from dating her, and I know my 18 year old self was pretty bad at following good advice. If you push too very hot against it you’ll probably push him away.

   I think you best move is to stand by and be ready to support him if things go tits up

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3. I agree that you obviously don't trust her 100% so you need to start with being honest with yourself.

   And also I suppose I don’t understand why stay out at a hotel when you can come home to your bed?

   Because it's fun and a little luxurious and a free treat and a nice little perq she probably doesn't get often and she can sleep in and have breakfast the next morning and it's her birthday?? Sounds like a lot of reasons to do it especially because it's her birthday.

   I get you being 'a bit disappointed' about not spending the actual day of her birthday with her but – honestly – that's a little selfish. It's her birthday, not yours and it's meant to be special for her not you. And after 11 years together, I'm sure you've spent plenty of birthdays with her and if you plan to be with her for life, you have plenty more to go. Missing one is so not a big deal and certainly not worth making a stink about. I've raised a family and am married with grandchildren and stepchildren and stepgrandchildren. Is the actual day important. Yes, sure. But is it a big deal to have to celebrate on a different day for one of about a zillion different reasons? No. Birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, Thanksgiving and so on and so forth have all had to be celebrated on a different day in our clan because scheduling is tough. It is not the date that matters, it's the celebrating.

   Be very, very careful about insisting she miss a rare, fun-for-her event – on her birthday no less – just because you can't go.

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