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This is so stupid. Why does something as small as this need a Reddit post? โHoney, sorry I had a headache and was having a bad day. I shouldnโt have done thatโ
You didnt cheat. Her friend raped you.
You need to tell your gf and go to the police to press charges and get a restraining order
What does your wife have to say about John and the photographer? Theyโre her friends after all?
I sincerely hope John is no longer in the picture. He sounds like he doesnโt have any respect for you, either as a person or as the man his friend chose to spend her life with. What a cruel thing to do!
Doing a repeat ceremony sounds like a great idea, provided he isnโt invited. But before doing that you need to get a handle on this and learn how to put it out of your mind. I donโt know what that would take – therapy, meditation, psychedelics – but the last thing you want is have your repeat ceremony and be unable to take your mind off the fact that the reason youโre there is because of John.