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I hadn't considered that but it is a good point.
Yeah, love bombing is a tactic narcissists use to hook you and reel you in. Once you're hooked, they start being who they really are. My father did that to my mother, and I ended up getting hooked by one myself. I escaped from both but it wasn't easy. Do yourself a huge favor and get away from her now, go No Contact. All she really cares about is herself. Find yourself a woman who truly cares about you. This one does not.
He ain’t exactly a wordsmith but the effort has gotta count.
All of that sounds terrible!! You can’t trust him. These are all red flags, not yellow.
The point? He’s not asking anything about Ownership or Assets or anything like that, unless he edited it out of the post in the last 7 hours.
He just is upset that she has no money to contribute to the purchase, she has no savings, and that she willfully throws her money away on things like the newest iphone pro when she just got a new iphone the last year instead of saving the money or using it on her debts. Like she didnt even get the regular new model of iphone, she went for the extra expensive Pro version
Depends on if you miss her. A halfway move might be unblocking her so she can reach out while sober to apologize?
Also not all the time are drunk words are not sober thoughts – not sure where that maxim came from. People who drink too much or have problems with alcohol can say and do things so totally out of character that they are horrified to hear about later on. Was she creating a spectacle for everyone else to see? I’d see if she is as apologetic when she is sober. I agree with what you said about how she has had opportunities while sober and her being drunk gives it less meaning ?
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To wait until you’re not dragging that hatred and mistrust into the next relationship. Got cheated on. Went through all the stages. Had friends telling me to “get back out there” too soon for me and I knew I wasn’t ready, so I stopped trying for another 6 or so months.
Don’t potentially hurt the next one by your unfinished business.
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A couple friends mentioned it was a smaller wedding and they feel like I'm just punishing them.
Just mention back that it's a smaller Christmas party this year.
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Your ex boyfriend?
Unless there is an expectation established between you two in advance to forgo presents or for a specific budget, I think it's extremely inconsiderate of her to not get you a single gift. Yet she made sure to get a dog something. She thinks of you less than a dog. It isn't even about the monetary cost, it's that she thought so little of you that she couldn't even be arsed to get you a pair of sweatpants or a candy or something. I bet she would have pissed her pants and cried like a child if you did the same.
OP my husband makes significantly more than I do. Like….10x more than me. He could buy himself whatever he wants. I make a list all year long of things he mentions he likes, would want, or thinks are cool, so I can have ideas. It isn't always something pricey either. So it isn't just, “she doesn't know what to get you”. You even dropped hints. She just didn't care enough to do it and that's incredibly sad.
Tbh due to the fact this isn't a one time thing, I wouldn't encourage staying with someone who gives that little of a damn about you. But if you do? Communicate with her it is upsetting to you and set a budget going forward. Her reaction to that request will be telling. If it upsets her and she won't work with you….again, I say leave her thoughtless, self centered ass. But if you won't do that, stop getting her presents for anything. Full stop. She doesn't deserve even a lump of coal imo.
Leave
Don't be a sucker!
Why are you dating someone who assaults you?
Every paragraph of this reads like a red flag.
Firstly, he groomed you. Nothing may have started until you were 16 (which with him being 24 was highly inappropriate), but he put you into a dependence type relationship early on.
He then succeeded in separating you from your family and friends. This is a form of domestic violence.
Then he was trying to coerce you into pregnancy, which would have put you more under his power.
Leave, and never look back, except as a warning sign of things to avoid.
Yeah. People are weird. Human brains suck at processing risk, chance, and theoretical situations. “Maybe one day, if…” is a hell of a drug.
I couldnt find my previous comment but under no circumstances do you stay. The longer you stay the more it will hurt EVERYONE yourself included.
The longer you stay the more hope his mom might have you work out, the longer you stay the more he might thin you forgave him (though he deserves the hurt) But the longer you stay, the more likely you might not want to leave later,
Leave NOW and rip the band-aid off, he made his bed and now he's quite literally laying in it.
you live in mormonville and are still this wrong lmaooooo. take off the rose tinted glasses my guy, or move away. you're not thinking clearly
He's not your BF
Formalize it.
Thank you so much, honestly it really helps
She isn't even a bus stop on the way, but the very last stop.
10 plus 10 is 20, so the math checks out.
oh honey… She didn't need to force anyone not to see you. This is all you babe.
i wouldn’t reach out for a while – you just broke her heart and no one wants that kind of pity. it makes you feel really gross. my ex and i only spoke 3ish months after our breakup after dating for 2.5 years and then, i had felt better about myself and i let him apologize for being a douche during the breakup. your intentions are not bad, and i get being her best friend and being someone who truly helped her in her life! it’s just not fair to her or you to try to be friends, at least right now
“It’s a trap”
Is not about moving on babes is kind a economic abuse…
I would suggest that you replace the toilets… if the toilets are 15+ years old, they are the old style… the newer style of toilets out now have had the exit redesigned to not clog. It’s about $350 per toilet… I would start with the toilet on the main floor.
Go live and find a reputable local plumbing service that also installs new toilets. Most of them do. Call them up and ask if they have toilets that hand “poop” problems because your toilets get clogged every month. Don’t be embarrassed, they hear this all the time. In general, they can come out in a week or less, and remove the old toilet and install the new one and haul the old one away. These are experienced plumbers doing this, so you can ask them about your way,plunger, vs hubby’s way and see what they say… you should also ask them about toilet paper, (I had a clogged toilet that I couldn’t get unclogged. The plumber was very helpful in unclogging it, and telling me my toilet paper was one of the worst for clogs…). After unclogging, my toilets had this problem often even with different tp, I called them back, got a quote, and hired them to come back and replace the toilets. It was easy peasy….
Your husband is a stubborn ass…. My husband was the same way… he and I got into a fight over replacing the toilets in our master bath with a comfort height toilet. Separate story to the one in the previous paragraph. He said no, I said yes. I hired a plumber to come to do it. He used it once and said wow, this is nicer than the old one…
I doubt he is going to divorce you over replacing a toilet… and if he does, you can tell all his family and friends that the reason he left you is because you replaced a toilet… and you really doing want to be married to someone who would leave you over replacing a toilet anyway…
First, I am so sorry this happened to you. You were raped. Regardless of her motivations, good feeling or baby trapping, this person initiated a sexual encounter with you without your explicit and enthusiastic consent. Even if you were going to have sex with her in 1 minute, 10 minutes or 10 years at that moment she did not have your consent when she forcefully inserted you into herself.
She then continued to forcefully have sex with you for 10 minutes or so. This encounter was extremely predatory and disgusting by her.
There are many options ahead of you: – Report the encounter to the police. – End the relationship. – Get an STD check.
Beyond that, something that may not have occurred to you is the need to feel safe again, this may effect your ability to have sexual relations in the future and you would be 100% within your rights to feel unable to trust future partners. With that said, trauma should always be handled with the help of a professional, and there are many available to victims of sexual assault. These vary by state/country so I would suggest looking into what is available to you locally.
You should not allow yourself to feel ashamed, embarrassed or like you are not worthy of help. Rape comes in many forms, it doesn’t have to be violent, it doesn’t have to involve being held down and if certainly doesn’t only happen to women. Please seek help, you are human and are worth more than this, you deserve better and should absolutely advocate for your right to safe and enjoyable sex, from foreplay to climax.
Yeah leave him alone
Seriously. Does this count as spam?
Also, men get your HPV vaccine too. You don't want be spreading that to people you care about!
The switch is disconcerting… how long into the relationship did it start?
Throw this guy away. He’s an abusive alcoholic and his “Angel” behavior while sober doesn’t cancel his abusive behavior out. Now, he’s manipulating you to stay with him by threatening to kill himself. You don’t deserve this. Someone who truly loves you wouldn’t treat you like this. He needs to get himself together and only he can do that, when he wants to. Save yourself and end things with him. If, on the very low chance he does hurt himself, remember it’s not your fault. He has problems that you cannot help him with.
To be off work from burn out and it just keep going on – that sounds like depression. And sure, you can feel empathy for that but that's not the end of the story. She needs to see a therapist because that's what adults do. If y'all can't afford it then she should at a minimum take on some kind of part time work to pay for therapy.
She should have a passion – and one that enriches her as a partner. You didn't take on a ward. This isn't a child bride marriage. You married an adult and she's acting like a minor. Why would you want that?
It's time for her to live up to her vows or admit she doesn't want a partnership.
It’s totally fine to break up with someone if you don’t have the same views about children. However I’d like you to consider the following:
Educate yourself on birth control for women. Don’t go around asking women to get on birth control. Our options (though there are several) all suck. Most are hormone based and cause bad side effects for many women, including depression, pain, abnormal bleeding, lack of libido, weight gain, suicidal ideation, etc. The non-hormone ones are usually bloody painful as they stick it through your cervix with no pain meds…sorry this is a pet peeve of mine, you can’t just expect a woman to do this.
If you really don’t want children, get a vasectomy. Problem 1 is solved also, if condoms are not enough for you.
Just because someone is pro-choice does not mean they will get an abortion. Don’t assume this, and don’t pressure anyone into getting one.
Sex is not just about PiV intercourse. If you really don’t want a kid, don’t cum inside the place that gets women pregnant. Do other stuff. It’s that simple.
No, just invite her to a cafe, pay for her tea and carrot cake and tell her you’re ashamed as hell, but you just need to come out and tell her that you’re 20. Show her your licence. Say you lied because you were embarrassed and wanted to seem more mature than you are. Say you understand if she needs space and that you’re going to be doing a lot of self/reflecting about what caused you to lie.
And just wait and see what she says
Excellent shit post lmfao
I don’t see anything wrong with it as long as neither of you are obsessively checking it all the time
Yes, men and women can absolutely live together and maintain a completely platonic relationship. I’m 26F and my roommate is 33M. There has never ever been even a modicum of tension or interest between us. He’s in great shape and a handsome guy, and I’d say I’m decently attractive on my good days, but neither of us are each other’s type in any capacity and we are just really good friends. It’s the best living situation I’ve ever had. He gives me relationship advice, I help him pick out outfits for dates and trips, it’s awesome! My partner loves him too and has never been uncomfortable.
Your guy’s living situation sounds messy and I can understand how that could bother you, but him living with a woman without all the drama is not inherently something to be worried about whatsoever.
Why did his previous 3 marriages break down? This is really important information and I hope you understood that before you got married
Come on, of course you tell her. Would you want to know?!
I’ve been cheated on and I’ve had strangers let me know. I was never angry at the messenger.
This’ll be an unpopular opinion, but for me it would depend on how well I know the person. Some people don’t want the truth and will shoot the messenger.
If you’re really concerned tell a friend who’s closer to her and let them tell her. But pick one person and tell only them. You wouldn’t be doing the poor woman a favor by letting it get around too much. Whether it becomes the talk of the town should be her decision.