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He's cheating on you. He wanted you out of the house to make it easier for him to cheat.
Stop texting him? Then your feelings never get hurt.
I really don’t like the idea that whenever I receive a text I’m meant to stop what I’m doing & respond ASAP. Then there’s more texting back & forth before I can resume whatever I was doing.
Maybe just accept that he’s not much for texting and that it has nothing to do with you.
Were the sex and meeting up texts after you two got together or in the past ?
As someone who has a male best friend I can assure you that there’s nothing to worry about, she’s with you for a reason, if she liked him she would’ve already been with him instead but if it bothers you you should tell her your reasons and why you feel that way, I’m sure she’ll understand and maybe invite you to their hangouts next time (even tho I’m not sure if you’re gonna like that because they’ll have their own conversation going and it’ll be naked to include you)
If I say if I say “Hi” as in when you greet someone he will say “I am not high, I am low” and start laughing again as if he thinks he is funny.
Congratulations, your friend is now your dad and you will never go one day without hearing another dad joke.
In all seriousness, you can either grin and bear it or sit your friend down and tell him that you don't like his jokes. If you consider him a friend and would ideally like to continue to hang out with him, then those are your only two options.
In my mind, it would be stupid to stop hanging out with a good friend just because you can't muster up the courage to tell him how you really feel.
Because she isn’t interested in being your friend. She only wants your bf’s attention. You did the right thing!
Lol go look at their post history. Full of things that never happened
HE'S 56??????? HOLY COW I thought this a pair of slow teens!!
You are a kid and want so badly to be all grown-up so you contrive
these games in the back of your head. Nothing wrong with that as
long as you continue to acknowledge that you are still in a place
where you are trying to figure all this shit out.
BTW: You may want to start with investigating the definition of
the word “unfaithful”. FWIW.
It is really horrible and it is nothing to do with her. she’s never done anything to deserve these feelings
but i know that was the reason I broke up with her first. I was starting to lose attraction to her but after a while I realised what i was missing and I realised that that didn’t matter to me any more.
for months i didn’t even look at others beside her, but it just seems as time passes on im starting to feel the same way again.
I know i can’t have both things at once but deep down that’s what i want. obviously that’s out of the question, so what i want help with is how to stop these thoughts and feelings entirely.
It’s common for people to feel a sense of comfort and familiarity with someone they have been with for a long time, even if the relationship is not ideal. This can be especially true for people with autism, who may struggle with social interactions and communication and may find solace in the predictability and routine of a familiar relationship. Being alone can be intimidating and overwhelming for some people, and they may prefer to stay in a familiar, even toxic, relationship rather than face the unknown.
Already told 🙂
Girl he stopped being your bf a month and a half ago.
And FYI if it's a supplement to a healthy sex life, I have no issue. But now it's a substitute. A BIG problem.
She’s told you she wants to fuck other guys… and doesn’t care if you fuck other girls. If this isn’t ok with you that’s perfectly alright, but what was said was said. Sorry to be so blunt.
DITCH. TODAY.
I don't want to hurt her, I'm disgusted with my own thoughts and I didn't had the courage to post my crippled thoughts over here. I might have asked her million times if everything is okay around her house, and gave her all the assurance to make everything right. I just don't what is happening or what to do to know the reality. I need help with it. I'm don't want to humiliate her that's why i can't even ask anything like this to her. Help me.
Ignorance isn't a suitable excuse when the result is so harmful. It's not like this information is elusive or restricted. If he gave a shit – he'd seek to be informed about what his partner and the person whom he claims to love is going through.
Is the entire issue based on you two living with your family? I can certainly understand from their perspective why that is frustrating. Are you not able to afford moving? Do the both of you have an income?
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Why would you point out something she can’t change right away… there’s no way to say something like that without being hurtful. It’s not her problem it’s yours clearly
Typical redditors always telling people to go to therapy lol
Or blaming OP for things out of his control
If his female girlfriend has changed her style and looks more like a boy why should OP go to therapy? For what exactly?
He is dating a women because he likes feminity, there's nothing wrong with wanting her to be how she's been all along.
She's suddenly changed not him
You people need to grow up
Here's the conversation dude, “I love you very much, but recently I've noticed you have changed your appearance and I'm not attracted to it”
And just go from there
That's too much. It's zero because he hasn't earned any. He's a brat. No electronics. Let him play with the physical toys he already has.
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It doesn’t at first glance sound nefarious or anything. You just need to talk about it. Personally, if it was namely clearly joking like that then I don’t expect I’d be overly concerned. Now if there was physical interaction i.e. kissing her friend, tries to discuss opening the relationship, becomes visibly demeaning, etc. then that’d be a naked pass for me. But until you talk about it and let her know that it makes you uncomfortable, feel possibly inadequate or insecure, w/e then it’s hot to fault her for having some fun albeit rather inappropriate while being in a relationship. She’s bisexual so she’s physically attracted to women; so essentially is like you telling a woman friend (the sex your physically attracted to) that you want to marry them, forget abt gf, etc. Though your gf may not have considered this, maybe her exes were comfortable with her playing with girls, or maybe it’s just so out of the realm of possibility that she only ever saw it as a harmless joke to which you’re letting her know, hey this actually is bugging me. Just talk it out.
What is he, the orgasm police? So what if he got you off this morning, that was this morning lmfao.
You want to be intimate and you’re willing to share your body. Problem is, he wants a hole to masturbate into. He doesn’t care about your needs because he’s only worried about his.
I don’t entirely fault him. I’m very sensitive to smells and urine is definitely pe(e)ak. If you guys want to be intimate, and that’s the barrier why not just freshen up? He should be cleaning his Johnson off too, it’ll lessen the risk for UTIs on you.
That's a lot of ew for me.
OP’s is 23 and 36… potato, potAHto?
She is going to baby trap you. Do not have sex with her. You need to think very naked if this relationship is healthy and you want it to continue. I wouldn’t have sex with her unless you supplied the condoms..buying fresh from the store each time. She told you she will sabotage your only means of birth control for her own selfish desire. Honestly, this is break up worthy. The trust is gone.
I am sorry for you but my mom doesn't suck. She has a good heart in the right place. Our communication is just a bit challenging at the moment
She does claim to have some sort of back thing that makes it so some work is naked for her hahahah
I don't think that helps my case whatsoever, but I'll throw it out there.
Thanks for the comment though, I definitely need to collect my thoughts on what positives there are here.
I didn't misunderstand you, and I doubt anyone else here did either.
You knew she had a bf the whole time but now you feel bad…lord
Your opinion and feelings are valid. I don't like this at all. I hate it. My boyfriend is not the type to call out stuff like this. He's not confrontational.
I am. I'd give this dude my two cents. In a perfect world, my boyfriend would have saints as friends. But the world is full of weirdos.
Yeah, they need to be honest but that doesn't mean they will be.
You can't expect someone to do the right thing for you, you're the one who needs to advocate for yourself and make the choices that are best for you because ultimately, people are selfish and will do what's best for them.
What's best for a man is to have easy access to sex, childcare, split rent/mortgage/bills, someone to cook and clean and someone to take on the emotional labour. If a man is getting all that without marriage, he will sit comfortably till the woman decides to leave or he finds his actual dream woman and dumps the woman who he strung along for years and years, to marry his dream woman within 1-2 years.
That's why I believe women need to have firm boundaries and be willing to walk, otherwise you end up in a situation like OP's gf and millions of other unfortunate women. You'll be left with regret and upset.
When you're coupled up with a man, you're not a hostage. You're free to leave at any time and you should exercise that right as soon as the relationship is no longer serving you.
Don't waste years on a man who won't commit to you. Go find someone who will commit, as soon as possible.
you are doing fine .
your wife has help from so many people .. she just doesn’t want to do it . simple. i don’t know what to do , that would be very frustrating .
I get that completely but how am I supposed to cut off a friend of mine because he’s friends with my best-friend ex boyfriend when they dated for one year 6 years ago. And am I supposed to tell my fiancé he can’t have his friend around because years ago before he was even in the picture my bestfriend dated him???
This is definitely what I think. She had a few bucks the other night and first thing she did was go out to eat.
She only has a few hundered in her savings too, which is insane considering she lived at home and has a job.
If she had never had supportive parents, did schoolwork/ worked instead of being at home chilling out, and didn't have the option to move back home, maybe it would be a different story. Maybe I would try to find a way to feed us both even though I literally can't afford it. But I'm so frustrated. She needs to make less than 500 a month to cover everything. And instead of doing something she wants my food.
I will definitely talk to her if this continues to happen and maybe lightly suggest her moving home as well (if it happens again).
OP, kindly, respectfully, get some therapy. If you are so insecure that a hypothetical answer to a completely irrelevant hypothetical question about childhood lice, of all things, is causing you enough emotional turmoil to necessitate a whole multi paragraph post? My guess is that you probably have some shit you need to work through in therapy before you're going to be able to have a healthy relationship with anyone.
Thank u
So you met this perfect man and then threw him out the moment your toxic ex who doesn't care about you reached out? Any particular reason why you made this choice?
I did realize how bad it was when I wrote it out but she has stopped that since November
There is likely nothjing you can do about him and his new gf no matter how disgusting it is.
There is however something you can do in regards to your ex telling your kids to keep secrets from you. This is a huge major issue and 1 you need to sit and talk about. If he didn't want the kids telling you then I hope they aren't around her. A parent should be teaching their kids to be open and honest and as soon as you go down the route of telling them to keep secrets then that's a red flag. If you are both sorting out custody then I would raise this.
I’m sorry, but this isn’t gonna get any better. If he broke up with you before he will do it again. You need to take your own life into your hands and do what you want because he’s just gonna take it from you. He just want you to be as miserable as he is.
What was the argument about?
Nope single is not an option. I'd rather keep my girl.
Thank you. I hadn’t met my now girlfriend in person at that point so we weren’t dating yet but I feel guilty any time she mentions when we started talking.
Yes. He's cheating.
I can't believe I am so invested in this condom mystery. Please update.
Of course he does I'm just saying if you are going to give an excuse being fat isn't really an excuse.
She hates her because “she’s like her father”
Ok and wtf does that have to do with this post lol
Lmaoo no! I went at a teenager… then again as an adult after a DV type situation with my ex
Mate this guy is rude! I don’t get why so many people are saying you’re overreacting?? Don’t get me wrong, I like frogs, but if someone said I looked like one I’d think I had bulbous eyes or a weird wide mouth or something.
Aside from that, you were clearly upset about it and he had a go at you for being sensitive?? And he got you to apologise??? And this isn’t the first time he’s made a strange little comment to belittle you?!?
Girl, run.
I know some people are giving you shit, but I think you come across as very mature for a 22 year old
Is there a reason why you can’t share custody? My partner ended things with his wife after a similar situation (his wife cheated, not him), and his 5 year old is week on/week off between households. It works pretty well for everyone involved, his son adjusted to it fairly quickly and seems to enjoy having 2 families and 2 bedrooms. Also, I’m really sorry this happened. Infidelity can be absolutely soul destroying, sending internet hugs
Put the wedding on hold. Just focus on dating for a while. At 18 and 19 you’re too young emotionally no matter your educational achievements.
Clearly she’s a perfectionist who hates to “fail” at anything so let her focus on school and perhaps start therapy to let go of the negative self image and self talk.
Is your question “How naked and sexy am I”?
Who cares what other people think? Your life is in danger.
I’m sure you’re leaning towards giving him the benefit of the doubt. You are in a difficult position. But it’s smart to start look at this relationship (and all relationships!) a little more critically. Sometimes we get swept up in everything that we forget to protect ourselves.
Why don’t you approach him with your issues and see how he reacts? In a healthy relationship, you should be able to approach each other about anything and everything without worrying about being judged or “punished” your partner.
The biggest red flag I see is that he doesn’t want you to meet his friends. In every remotely serious relationship I’ve ever been in, we were always eager to introduce each other to our friends (but maybe not our families).
Add on that you’ve voiced that you want to, and that he hasn’t accommodated… ??♀️
In my 20s, I briefly dated a “D List” celebrity in NYC. He seemed great when we were together. Very loving and attentive. But there were a few times that I felt that I wasn’t a priority (He was very busy). So I tried to break it off a couple times because I didn’t want to be an inconvenience. He was always adamant that he didn’t want to, so we would go back to “dating” and eventually, I’d feel kind of forgotten again. He, like your partner, often threw money at the problem.
Long story short, he might have liked me and might not have wanted to break up, but his actions repeatedly showed me that he didn’t care enough about me.
I heard for years after we broke up that he missed me and that I had been a great girlfriend. That he didn’t know what had gone wrong- he was a “good guy” (spoiler alert: he really wasn’t lol) on paper but just terrible at relationships and I didn’t want to be a part of that as much as I liked him.