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48 thoughts on “Tefavega live! sex chats for YOU!”
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So is he going to think that taking care of your baby would be cringe and disgusting too? Changing diapers? I’d be rethinking this whole thing, unless you want to do everything alone.
Maybe check online for 'dogging' spots nearby or exactly at that spot in the forest. Because that is what this sounds like. The houses might be from Grindr or a similar app. Not saying it's 100% certain, but I really can't imagine it's anything else. I mean, It could be a fight club? Which would explain why he's not talking about it, but he is missing the telltale blackeyes and bruises so…
Maybe also take an STD test for your own piece of mind, random sex with strangers is pretty risky, if it is that.
Hopefully you can read all these replies whilst you're sprinting out the door.
He is full of shit
You're his nanny and his therapist without him putting in any work, so of course he would keep you around.
Frame therapy as a personal development tool that high-achievers use, rather than something weak and needy people do.
She’s being nice because you texted her on her birthday. She probably thinks you’ve moved on enough to feel comfortable doing so without thinking it will open a can of worms. Please don’t prove her wrong. Just say thanks and keep it moving. I had an ex like this and eventually realized what a dumbass I was being. I cringe now just thinking about it. Be strong, friend.
Why not get a folding bed for the living room and put him in your bedroom? At least have some night privacy?
The child won’t accept it until you see determined but space and a door would help
No one claimed “seeing someone” = “in an exclusive relationship” in the first place. That's all you.
That’s like taking someone to dinner for their birthday and only paying for their appetiser, and making them pay for the rest.
She’s likely touched out tbh. I only have one kid and I know I got over being touched all day and then having my kids sperm donor coming at me trying to get laid.
Oh honey, not even then.
People don't understand this enough. I agree that this is a great comment and lays it out very well
Explain to him what you expect of a house guest. Keeping the toilet and sink clean after use, replacing the toilet paper to its original position, washing his own dishes, respecting your rules for your dog, etc. Explain to him that his 30 minute showers have doubled your water and gas bill, and tell him that he either needs to pay the difference or shower at his own house. Tell him that if he doesn't respect these conditions, you won't allow him over as a guest anymore. These are not unreasonable rules, and respecting these conditions comes down to respecting you.
She indicated in a reply she appreciated my perspective. I wasn’t trying to negate anything she was feeling.
There’s a few things here. First, breaks are bullshit. They don’t fix problems; they delay addressing them. What do you expect this buffer to accomplish?
Second, even if we ignore all that, I unfortunately have never seen a more clear situation where a “break” was agreed to essentially to end the confrontation. He wants to break up with you. He woke up and said he wants time apart. I imagine you fought it, and as a result he agreed to a break so he didn’t have to argue anymore. But this is a break up. In a week, that’ll be confirmed. I’m sorry to come off as mean here as it’s honestly not my intention. I just want to point out reality.
Third, you’re sort of being dishonest here even if you don’t realize it. You start by saying this is entirely due to his family. You later say you have fundamental communication issues. I think saying you’re “blindsided” doesn’t make much sense knowing that these problems exist.
If there’s a possibility this can be repaired, it can only happen if you talk to each other, identify the issues, and work as a team to address them. That includes his family. If he needs their approval, then nothing else really matters and you’re fighting an unwinnable battle. Good luck.
Lying by omission is still lying. She should have told you her real age when you first started dating.
And she's not the same person. You might not even know this woman. How do you know anything else about her is true? How long was she willing to let you believe that she was 23 and not 19??
It sounds like ADHD to be honest. Especially the hatred of being reminded all the time, it used to make me intensely angry when I was unmedicated.
I felt like all the joy I derived from doing my tasks or helping someone was taken away, since it was now something that was expected of me.
I don’t understand how you can believe you’re a horrible communicator. “No, of course I wasn’t with another man and I’m not dating anyone else!” It’s very clear.
Someone will only believe you’re lying if that’s what they really WANT to believe. And you can’t win over someone’s insecurities with truth and facts, they’ll choose their own feelings every time.
Throw this one back, you’re only in for a future of painful accusations and constantly having to prove yourself, limit yourself and make your world smaller so as not to set him off. You’ve literally done nothing to earn such distrust.
Divorce your husband, and call the police on his coworker. “Hubby” clearly doesn't respect you at all, or your grieving process, and coworker literally committed theft
That is ridiculous. The courts are ment to literally divide any $ after specific bills are paid and even it out for the kids.
In my opinion. Something isn't right. But I'm not a doctor. Or a sex instructor. Or marriage counselor. I was brought up Catholic and had a serious situation where my mother insisted on purity. Something really bad happened with a very good friend of the family. He was 7 years older and I had known him 6 years. It was traumatic and I was never the same. I couldn't admit it to myself for 4 years. It was a long time ago and I've done work on it, however the influence of my religion and family really scarred me. Please don't get me wrong. I uphold all the values of that religion. It is just nobody told me I was still valuable, beautiful and an amazing woman if I wasn't a virgin anymore. It was not my choice so I broke into a million pieces. If I'm totally off base, off the mark forgive me. I'm just guessing here. I know what it is like to be Catholic. I love my life now by the way.
This screams that she cheated with this guy and is now trying to deflect things.
You’re only 19, a woman isn’t worth this much stress. I’d say move on.
You absolutely are being cheated on buddy. It may not be physical yet, but it will be soon enough. Honestly just cut your losses and leave her.
Interesting feedback- thanks. I didn’t necessarily want to save him, I just wanted to make him feel loved and cared for because I also have a traumatic past and know what it’s like to feel alone in the world. I think my caring was to overbearing for him?
I always date people from traumatic backgrounds because I have a traumatic background and feel more comfortable with people who do.
The best thing to do would be to remain friends, if you can handle that. Remember it's entirely possible you meet someone in college too!
Go for it! Don’t hold back on opportunities because of a relationship because it could potentially cause resentment down the line. You may regret The chance you never took and subconsciously (or consciously) hold it against her. 6-9 is a long time yeah but it’s doable. If it was a permanent job that would be different. Definitely make sure she feels secure and loved when you are away though, because ultimately the long distance is your choice.
Okay you…. Need to stop
You weren’t official.
You should have never went through his phone.
Your curiosity and insecurities are going to get you dumped lmao
bipolar does rear in stressful scenarios and in early adult years. Kinda sounds like it, and perfectly friendly and kind people do things that are so out of character. Unless she texts that she needs a ride to a mental hospital or is undergoing therapy, I’d leave it. sorry dude
I read this and was like, oh maybe I could give some advice. then I read the comments and responses from OP, and noped out real quick. It's too early in the day to get my head bitten off.
It’s highly unlikely you’ve really changed, even if you think you have. Let him go, don’t make life harder for him than you have. Get some therapy and focus on being your best self before dating again! You’re so young so it’s good to address this stuff now.
IIRC its called monkeybranching. Always keeping another branch open in case she needs a new monkey to hop to after her old one ditches her.
You need to get out asap.
If a strawberry test is the thing that ruins your relationship it might be for the best as it seems she hasn't moved on from the phone number incident.
How many times during the week do you walk on eggshells around him, afraid of his reactions?
I’m guessing several times per week. If so, then you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship.
He behaved like an absolute asshole to you and your kids, and now he wants you to apologize to him for making him act that way. He’s an abusive toddler.
Sorry but deal breaker for me. You guys all hang regularly but he doesn't want you there for his birthday? Sounds like he doesn't want you near his high school friends. Not once have I had a boyfriend I didn't invite to my birthday party, even if a new crush who's not yet a boyfriend I wanted them there.
This makes me wonder if he's got bad intentions with one of the guests, if he's embarrassed by you or the relationship, or something else is going on. You need to talk about this.
I’ve given many of my previous partners a “last kiss” during a break up. It sounds like you need to clarify this with him and directly ask him so you can find some peace.
Good that you guys communicated. Whatever happens, I hope both of you end up in good places.
Yes, as he finished a residency program.
Some doctors exclusively do research. Before medical school, I worked at a famous research lab with a cardiologist who only did laboratory bench research on genetic diseases.
Does she work?
Don’t take her back.
I'm sorry☹️?
Can he not look after his own kids? Or be tempted to say 'oh awesome, you are here to help. I'll be back later' and go out, either with the kids or without.
He doesn't want to get married and you've empowered him to keep pushing the possibility back. From his POV, he is getting everything he desires from the relationship.
So, either propose to him yourself or accept that he will not marry you and govern yourself accordingly.
If I were your fiance, I would end it and find someone who wanted to be my best friend.
Well if you're not getting proper treatment, the bitterness and irrationality would be understandable. Otherwise I'd stick with projecting.
People are going on about how he might like you and that may be true, but I would also be pissed that someone I hate is coming over to my house, especially if I knew it was going to be a regular occurrence.
It absolutely is a thing that experts recommend, to wait 24 or 48 hours to think about it. And that's to raise an issue in the first place
And waiting a few days to stress an issue isn't the same as a grudge, which is a long term building up of resentment. If the issue is important enough to address it's important enough to address a few days later. Otherwise it wasn't important enough to address at all.
What do you think the point of talking about offenses is? Scolding your partner? Getting an apology? No, not primarily. It's about communicating feelings to maybe prevent the issue from happening again, to feel heard and understood. A few days later doesn't affect that. It improves it, if you're able to communicate better with that time frame. Focusing on the time gap rather than the communication is just a way for the gf to avoid addressing the issue and make it about her.