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Your first step is to talk to a divorce lawyer – they will guide you through this.
Dude. You literally stole $2500. Would you stay with anyone who did that to you? ?
No, I am just new and inexperienced with relationships. Thank you for the advice.
Sure
I think your dad wants you to get married…
Bro she ain't your girlfriend no more. There's no way around it, she straight up emasculated you at the bar. Cut your losses right now. It sucks and I know how you feel. I think most guys have been through a situation like this. Try to keep your chin up bud.
if i had to take a shot everytime i see a post on reddit about bfs not wiping or cleaning their shit up, i would literally be dead at this point.
it's f*cking repulsive. idc if its a medical issue, he refuses to get help so he would rather deal with shit in his asscrack and underwear? and you're ok having sex with someone whose ass has crusty shit all over his genital area?
That dude is lucky he didn’t get his ass kicked. And how could you not know it’s actually a man? C’mon dude. For real?
i do NOT mean to come off like an asshole but if she brought up seeing other people more than likely she will do so wether you want her to or not. control what you can control and start your self improvement today. ?
Health declines if you let it. I am 35 and in the best physical and mental shape now forever, cause I have started prioritising it. There are things which are out of our control, but our lifestyle, movement, sleeping patterns, way we deal with stress and emotions, has incredible effect. You can be in your 50 and at your peak when it comes to health
I’m sorry but you shouldn’t be dancing with any other guys at the club. Do you want to act single instead of being home and committed with him. Guys don’t want a girl that goes out and disrespects him.
So, because you’re vegan, does that means you think veterinarians shouldn’t have the option of euthanizing a terminally sick and suffering animal? What if you are pregnant and the fetus hasn’t developed a brain? Or if you’re likely going to die or be permanently disabled if you carry the fetus to term? Anti-abortion means you won’t have a choice at all. And being pro-choice doesn’t mean you have to get an abortion, it just means you can choose. If I were you, I would make sure is politically for giving women the right to choose, and that he would just never abort himself (which is a super easy opinion for him to have since he will never be pregnant).
It's NOT you casing the problem!
That is what abusers do! They convince you that everything is YOUR fault. They wouldn't yell/slap/choke you if only you hadn't done [INSERT ACTION HERE].
He needs anger management. He can't control himself, and you are not qualified to give him the help he needs.
Until you get away, YOU ARE IN DANGER, and so is your daughter.
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You’re infertile and you have 4kids? Maybe the infertility is recent or you’ve just been blind to the infidelity. I would get dna tested lol.
Two months is not a long time to be dating. He may be burned out from work or he may have just changed his mind. People break up all the time. You are still young. I would recommend you just move on.
“only insecure guys”
please, kindly, fuck off with that misandry.
So.. You pissed because he has a hectic job?
You prefer a stay at home boy then?
Run. This is never going to change.
I read some of it, it was quite long. What I got was the 1st wife died so he can’t leave OP for her, I thought that was pretty obvious. I feel like OP is jealous of the love the guy has for his first wife which in my mind wouldn’t be unusual.
My guy, he is literally made of red flags.
Trust your gut. He’s mid /late 20’s dating a teenager. He’s probably judging you to see if you can be controlled and manipulated.
Talk about what his relationship is like with his family. There might be a lot of stuff you dont know about. It can also explain why hes not prioritizing introducing you.
Talk to your landlords. Tell them he is giving you major creeper vibes based on what he is doing. Ask them if any previous tenants have complained about him. Also tell them that if there are issues about trash cans or similar that you will handle them. Phrase it like you don't want to put them out. Ask if you can install a security system because you're not feeling safe.
I’m like this, I’ve woken up as my husband was entering me many times, several times I’ve been on top when I’ve woken. First time I freaked out and he’s like ummm you started this, I woke up to you groping me.
This. If you are gonna get married – do yourself a favour and get a prenup. It’s women like the OP that really fuck up things.
Anybody with common sense can tell OP will end up shagging the ex again eventually. OP – that chapter is closed… if you really loved your husband you wouldn’t even be considering this in the first place. SMH
I'm not sure if there's a way back from it. Tell her how you feel, don't pretend. If there's a way forward, it begins with communication.
My advice never fall so hot so early. You’re hurt over someone you weren’t in a relationship. I understand it’s confusing & can be a bummer because of the potential you seen in your future with her, but in my opinion you should be happy that you got rid of someone who wasn’t really interested as you were in them. We’re in the same age group, but I’ve had this happen to me at a younger age. I’ve been here before, and I can tell you man if she’s hurting you already imagine the pain she’d put you through down the line? The greatest part about this is there are other women out there who love consistency, and would be happy to enjoy a fella like you.
Your comment is not only extremely offensive, but also completely ignorant. Your own obscure opinions are not truths.
While I think addictions aren’t healthy, he’s not cheating on you. Being frustrated SUCKS, like yeah you had a baby which is great, but he is also human. Maybe he needs something you aren’t giving him or he’s picked up a habit out of frustration. He shouldn’t lie about it; he should say if he’s missing something in the relationship so he’s not back to using sex games to get off. You know about his kinks, are we keeping up his kinks and love for exhibition? Are we doing at least most of the sexual acts you were? Sounds like you both need to sit down and be 100% honest about where you are sexually and what that will look like moving forward with kids. Because he’s already backed up and making up for time and the disconnect will ruin you both if you continue to let the rift grow larger.
I agree with trishsf. She sent your photo to tell him to back off. She is committed. You have some issues that you need to address. Find a counselor.
You proceed by ending a friendship with a racist bigot. If you don't, you're validating their position.
Honestly I don’t know. Maybe he’s trying to cope, or maybe he isn’t as hurt as you thought he was and was perfectly satisfied with just having sex with you.
Either way, I advise you not to have sex with him again. If anything else, it’s a gesture of genuine remorse. You are showing him that you aren’t going to risk hurting him again just to have sex.
Did you make it clear that you wanted him to propose and that it was important to you?
You also have not proposed to him in nine years, and it sounds like you do not have good communication.
You’ve got got morals. Drunk driving is fucking stupid. Good on you
Lol it’s not that I’m trying to justify. I’m just stating facts. I didn’t wanna write whole ass 3-4 pages essay about the situation. That’s why I had to go back to elaborate a little bit but to each their own 🙂
I would never be with or respect someone who left their kids. Spouses… sure.. shit happens. But to leave your kids and fuck them up for life.. girl bye!!!
Pretty much, bad standing with family (me too so thats not a red flag) and all his friends are pretty much live so he didnt have anybody. There are a lot of other things im realizing that just arent enough to constitute staying with him. Im going to have a talk with him tonight and put my foot down, im going through a lot right now which is why i think im allowing this behaviour. No buts, this is just the first healthy relationship ive ever had so i really want it to make it work. But just bc he doesnt yell or get violent doesnt mean he gets a green light to overlook my needs. I just needed some help backing my thoughts, i dont have a lot of people i can talk to, the internets helping my backbone. Thank you
so ur boyfriend literally contributes in other ways? the problem is the gf isnt contributing to shit. and its nice that you dont care if pretty much living completely free on your dime, but other people do.
Yeah, see this is what I was hoping…I do have a tendency to read into things. Unfortunately evidence points to the contrary. I appreciate your response. Wish me luck out there.
Ugh sounds very similar to when me and my ex were together. He was completely uncaring about my healing, that it hasn't even been a month, or that he brought me an std while pregnant.
It worked out though. I got the kids, he got the freedom. Now that I'm older, guess who the (adult) kids wanna be around? Guess who the kids won't call unless they want money?
Yeah. As my kids say, fuck him.
Tell her that when you slep with Natalie, you were technically on a break so you werent cheating. Your fault is lying about it which everything would have been fine if she never found out, but she did.
To move on, just tell her again and again that you have got Natalie out of your system (have you?), and now are ready to focus on her alone.
This is not normal. She's hiding something. Prepare for fireworks.
You both shouldn't get married. Period.
I think you’re doing a good job. Keep doin what you’re doing. gently suggesting some inner work could be helpful. Take care.
If she threatens suicide call the experts then her parents. Then get out.
You've got this
I dont think you need his acknowledgment to know how you feel is valid. You know he's full of shit. Just believe what you're seeing and treat him like a cheater.
Sorry. I should have clarified. Both of my kids are adults.
This is terrible advice. The point in learning about love languages is about both learning to express the way your partner naturally gives a love, and learning to express love in the way that means the most to them. It's absolutely very healthy to put effort into expressing love in the way that is closer to what your partner wants, even if it feels awkward for you at first. That doesn't mean you need to do exactly what your partner wants, or that you shouldn't have limits, but being together with someone often means stretching out of your comfort zone for their sake.
Save the heartache and pain and break up now.