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Yeah full stop
so, you'll drop your partner like a bad habit if the're accused of something nasty. good to know
God you really are having a hard time reading huh.
no, just disgusted with you
It does sound like you’ve done a lot and you’re nearing the end of your tether, which is understandable. I think you’re also still fairly young and while she has some amazing qualities, she needs to do some work on herself before being in a relationship with anyone. It sounds harsh, especially from a stranger from the internet lol but I’ve been there. I’d say if you’re waking up and feeling dread at the thought of seeing her, that’s pretty significant. Pay attention to that feeling.
It’s hard to know when to end a relationship, especially when you see so much potential in someone. It can also be naked when it’s coming up to significant dates: Christmas, Valentine’s Day, birthdays, anniversaries – nude to end it around this kind of year but also really difficult to gear yourself up and be excited when you’re feeling off about the relationship.
Self harming is also so challenging to deal with as a partner, let alone everything else that you’ve already shared. It sounds like it’s all become quite toxic (e.g not feeling like you want to make new friends, constant need for reassurance etc). I honestly think she needs to start focusing on herself more but obviously that’s not in your control. You could encourage her to be honest with her psychologist or ask for a new one maybe, but that’s it really.
Also thank you! I wouldn’t say I love myself but I’ve certainly come a long way.
Right – but the headline here is he won’t stop worrying the kids are not his – kind of a no-brainer to start with a paternity test –
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You have 4 kids and you are out there donating sperm? ?
How long until you guys stop living together?
He either loves photography or he doesn't… If he loves it, getting coffee for a photographer that is more talented and successful than him would be a way to learn.
Whether you see it as emotional abuse is irrelevant. She’s complaining but not leaving. If it’s for financial stability more than his personality then she’s equally using him.
He’s not changing. She’s not choosing him because he’s flexible.
It’s her choice.
She’s had 10+ years of dating but been unsuccessful? Unless she herself figures out those reasons and patterns to break, it will likely repeat. Not to mention it gets more difficult to date with age.
This is absolutely ridiculous. OP, you are overreacting and you should probably figure out why you have such a strong reaction to it. Of course domestic violence is a serious issue, but he wasn't legitimately hurting you nor was he trying to, the gesture was for dramatic / theatrical effect and he communicated this with you. Making such a big deal out of him essentially doing nothing but use illustrative body language just makes you sound exhausting.
I had a similar thought in mind and would say that you're making it a low barrier to cross. The first step is to pay the amount due with interest and tag on another 50% for pain and suffering. Once this is paid, then contact can be resumed. Once contact is resumed, OP can then make the judgement on whether the invitation is warranted.
Of course he's not going to be willing (or able) to cough up the money. If he did, give that to the mom so that she can take it easy for a bit.
Comment Rule 1: All comments must be on topic and focus on the OP, in good faith. Derailing arguments, fights, and moral whataboutism is not allowed. Advice given must be good, ethical advice. Remember, the goal is to help your fellow human.