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It's a good MMO but the salient point is that MMOs are designed to hit that reward center in your brain, with every quest ended, every turn-in of resources or crafting of objects, every boss downed. It also has great writing and music, which makes it good for escaping a world where you're depressed and overwhelmed. Ask me how I know. I don't play anymore, but it was definitely a crutch in some dark times for me.
“It's cloud illusions I recall I really don't know clouds at all” ~Joni Mitchell
I would never keep a friend that I couldn't trust no matter how long I've known them. You don't get points because you're a good friend “sometimes”.
There are many health conditions that can cause penetrative sex to be painful – vaginismus, endometriosis, vulvodynia, etc. However, if you’re partner can’t be bothered to make sure you’re aroused before you have sex and refuses to use lube, I’d say that’s the issue.
It might seem easier to ‘push through’ painful sex than tell your partner HE’S not meeting YOUR needs but trust me, this will only make sex more painful in the future. Your body will anticipate pain and tense up whenever you’re about to have sex. You can actually develop/worsen vaginismus from continuing to have painful sex. I know because it happened to me.
Honestly OP, even if the sex wasn’t painful, what are you doing dating a guy who clearly doesn’t care at all if sex is enjoyable for you? You deserve someone who WANTS to turn you on and who derives pleasure from your pleasure. Your boyfriend sounds selfish as fuck.
You can’t really “force” yourself into it. Closest you can get is “trick” yourself into it but that’s not consistently effective and won’t necessarily last long.
Don’t fully understand this culture tbh. What if two people love each other but they don’t get the freedom of will to choose? Idk
The thing is, some ppl are asexual. & thats okay.
But entering a relationship you have to be upfront if you're asexual. Otherwise it's not being honest and transparent.
If she had told you from the start sex was something she was not interested in and you agreed that would be one thing. But she blindsided you with this & therefore was dishonest to an extent.
You committed to her with the idea sex would be apart of your relationship.
You're not compatible. & first love heartache hurts. I know. We all know. So solidarity to you. You WILL get through this. Stay strong.
Based fiance
What advice do you want?
You have way too many children for you to actually be a proper father to all 11 of them, and it doesn’t sound like you care anyway.
Paying for their necessities is a basic, being there when they’re unwell is also very basic.
I’m not sure what you’re looking to discuss. Tbh I would just discuss how you’re gonna go find someone else
He played you. She played him. They’re both sociopaths who need to erased from your life. I think it’d be a waste of positive energy and inviting negative energy (more dramatics) into your life to report him. If he loses everything, who do you think he’d come after? Sometimes, being all righteous is just for show. You don’t owe your future to anyone by doing the “righteous” thing; you’ll suffer the revenge (by a furious ex) all by yourself. Erase your ex and his equally sociopathic tart from your life—ghost and block.
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Amendment: I looked at some of the other expenses because I thought 60% seemed crazy/impossibly high and I had an excel error. Actual COL increase between the two places is closer to 30%. We’re talking about spending 1200-1600 in rent for a two bedroom in his city versus the 750-900 range in my home town. Vet care for our two cats, food, gasoline, vehicle maintenance, utilities, etc were all significantly more expensive as well.
As long as his name doesn’t go on the title and you want the house, why not. Then get a prenup if y’all get married. You pay all the costs with YOUR money, that’s your stuff. But I’m a cynical guy now who trusts no one.
On one hand she's lovely. She messages she loves me, I'm on her Instagram posts and she's introduced me to all her friends and even her co -workers know about me but on the other hand she is able to lie to my face, even after I told her honesty is important to me, she still stuck with her story.
I can assure you there are women who do this and far more and still cheat, I had an ex who tattooed my name very big and bold on her waist even though i told her not to, just to prove to me that she loves me and im the only one, and guess what, she was cheating on me, to this day i haven't seen the tattoo in person only on a picture the day she did it
Not every guy they cheat with will have an empathetic conscience and realize that what he's doing is bad and he needs to come clean to you, most of them don't really give a shit and the fact she has a boyfriend would just be more thrill to them. She continued to lie even though you told her how important being honest in the relationship is, that just shows she has no respect for nether you nor the relationship
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Professor's office. I call it a cabin occasionally because that's what the term was back in high school for me. It's out of habit.
You can’t change the past, there’s nothing you can do. We grow as we learn and we learn as we live!. Do the best you know how moving forward, that’s really all you can do. Sometimes it is too little, too late.
Your attaching strings as we speak. Just save yourself the trouble and stop having sex with this dude and move in. He’s clearly just interested in sex and has said so as well.
We can only go off what he tells us….and since he told us his wife is is unfaithful ..and we all know cheating is a character trait…then it's obvious this relationship was doomed It's best to leave now
You’re allowed to make rules for your partner, that’s how a healthy relation ship works cause you respect each other and want to make sure they’re comfortable.
Asking that she wear clothes isn’t an outrageous request and she’s allowed to say no, it just makes them less compatible and no one is in the wrong
He made you feel welcome before you got drunk and abused him. He told you to make it home safely before you got drunk and abused him. The actions he took before you got drunk and abused him have no bearing on how he responds to you moving forward. He’s made it clear how he’s moving forward: by not responding.
You weren’t drugged and repeating it over and over is simply you trying to convince yourself. Everyone else can see this for what it is and it’s unfortunate for you that you lost a friendship but you’ve learned a difficult lesson about drinking to excess in the process. Was “meeting friendly people” and drinking until you’re blackout worth the price you’ve paid?
I think you and I both know that it hasn’t been.
He doesn’t want anything to do with you and his silence is speaking volumes to that end. Respect him now in the way you didn’t while you were drunk. At least while you’re sober here and now you can respect his wishes to no longer engage with you.
Ultimately it doesn’t matter what you want or how horny you are. He doesn’t want to talk to you right now and that’s because of your choices. The sooner you start to sober up and recognize that your fun is destructive the sooner you’ll stop torching things you care about.
Her saying these things is (perhaps unintentionally) manipulative and unfair to you. Because you see the reaction you had? You see the pressure you felt? “I'm the only one that can make her feel safe and secure”. Is the thought that puts in your head.
And for her, if you stick around, she'll feel pressured, because she knows you want more than friendship. Even if she doesn't realize it, that will be going on.
She needs a good friend(s), family and therapy to get herself figured out.
This sounds like a business deal instead of a relationship. Break up with this guy and find someone who loves you for you, not the amount of money you earn!
Yuck, I bet the mess is from OP if I’m being honest…she has a million disgusting animals at this man’s house and asking him to clean up! YUCK!
If you were in his shoes, would you have handled it differently?
Yep, I wouldn't have bothered staying the night, but maybe he needed the sleep and didn't feel safe to drive
You’re an abusive piece of shit. Leave the relationship. The answer to someone getting physical is to remove yourself. You didn’t strangle her in self defense. You fucking strangled her and then tried to lie about it and gaslight her. What the fuck dude? You need help. You’ll wind up killing her if this relationship continues. Strangulation is the number one indicator that an abusive partner will kill their victim. You need psychiatric help immediately.
You intentionally avoid explainibg the trauma. Perhaps, because if you did it would raise questions how you trigger them.
If you want sth else then pat in the back and hearing you are correct, then provide actual substance of the problem.
She is spoiled above all else
This feels like another one of those made up posts for attention
You are in a mentally abusive relationship! You need to get yourself therapy so that you can see what is so obvious to everyone else. The manipulation of threatening self harm if you leave is so wrong. You said you’re graduating medical school soon, so I’m going to put this in a way you might understand. If a patient came to you threatening to harm themselves, would you sacrifice yourself to protect them or would you contact a psychiatrist to assess? Let him make the threats and just call in a welfare check! He will hopefully be taken to get help but I highly doubt that he has any desire to harm himself. His depression and anxiety is likely just another tool to manipulate you!
You need to get out of this relationship because it’s never going to get better. You’re on here defending him instead of listening to the advice that you asked for.
As bad as it sounds it’s also telling about yourself. Sounds like you would cheat.
This is borderline emotional abuse. He’s trying to guilt you into HIS dream of a SAHM and come home to a very hot cooked meal, all chores done and then in the bed for sex every night. He doesn’t share your dream of becoming a nurse .
He wants kids asap it sounds like before marriage even.
My advice would be first to make sure if you’re on birth control pills is to hide them. I’ve read many posts where the BF or husband would hide or throw away the BC pills so she’d get pregnant. If you use condoms make sure you use only the one you buy and hide so he can’t poke holes. Also seen men sabotage condoms. If you use condoms make sure he doesn’t stealth you as an “accident”. Make sure you feel regularly that he’s still wearing it.
All this advice is if you’re going to stay w him.
Y’all need to have a serious conversation of what y’all’s future together looks like. If he is serious that he only wants a SAHM & no compromise then y’all should go your separate ways.
But if y’all can compromise on kids and careers it might could work.
Is he in college? If so for what? And if not what’s he doing for his career?
Nursing school is hot and the first few years you’ll most likely be on nights. So having a baby quickly would be very hot to start off your career.
My wife is a nurse and I remember when she was in nursing school how hard it was. Then she was on nights until she went into home health. But then her hours were long. We didn’t have our daughter until my wife was on days and still it was difficult because I worked nights.
Don’t let anyone mess with your dreams. If they can’t or won’t support you then they aren’t worth your time
bingo
I'm trying to comprehend how a “normal” person would ever find telling someone their much loved relative died would be “funny.” That's not even remotely funny, and I should warn you, if this is consistent behaviour, it's one of the markers of a psychopath. Not all psychopaths are dangerous killers, but they generally aren't nice people.
If this is any indication of her general level of empathy, DO NOT move in with her. My mother turns 80 in a couple of months. She's relatively healthy, but if someone joked about her dying, I'd tell them to get out of my house, and possibly not come back. Empathy is a cornerstone of being a good human. If she lacks that, you're headed for a lot of pain being with her
You get closure by serving papers and cutting off his gaslighting. All for closure you keep torturing yourself. Is that worth it?
That's not for you to worry about. Only if he still messes with her. If so I urge you to care for yourself and remove yourself from this situation all together. We can't control others only us, we don't know what her real hang up is. If you're in a competitive spot, excuse yourself because fuck that, you know?
What don't you have in common with them?
doubt she has thought that far ahead.
I know this is a terrible financial decision. We just can't afford it. How do I convince him of this?
Make it clear being with you long term is contingent on him becoming financially responsible, which includes a plan to be debt free.
Put all wedding plans on hold immediately no matter how much you may “lose”. Then take time apart to think on this. Reconsider all red flags you may have previously dismissed
Sounds like they are or have been into each other if they both dislike each other's partners. I would just ignore them as it seems to be the norm for their friendship.
Yes that’s likely true, there has been times where I have said no and i’m done but he continues to try and that’s when I need to stay strong!
Same, also a dominatrix and have never gotten that feedback so wtf is with that guy
He will most likely just lie if you ask.