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i know that was very stupid of me, but it felt like she is the soulmate i've been looking for and if i could show her love, affection and care, she might just change her mind and fight for 'us' with her parents for their approval.
but thanks for the reality check, i guess i needed that.
I understood he did suggest it and she said no. I agree with you.
Honestly, I'm not 100% sold on the idea that nicotine leaves you sober. Or at least not for all people. I've smoked cigarettes for a short while, as well as hookah with nicotine. And it hits me really nude, especially if I haven't smoked recently or haven't eaten enough. We're talking about stumbling around or generally being very carried away. Definitely not a state in which I'd drive a car. If I smoke often for some time, the effect gets more subtle but it's still there.
In the end I just decided that I'm not going down this path, as I prefer to be able to drive my car around whenever. And it feels better when you know you and your clothes don't stink. Watching my husband stop smoking made me super happy I stopped before getting really addicted.
I did. Same excuse as “if I tried harder I would had won the tournament”
I think they broke up in june. I kind of feel the same way but you could also say why would he cut someone off for someone he just met… I really don't know
All great advice OP. No amount of begging sending flowers can change her mind. I do feel that something in writing sent to her, NOT a text in your handwriting on a big card. Tell her from your heart what she means. Then all you can do is wait. Never forget you have children from her. Good luck mate.
So I just have to part ways with my best friend, someone I've known for a quarter of my entire life? I'd like to think that's not the only option. It's a scary thought, I'm sure you understand my POV. Sucks that she's also my best friend because it will not be easy staying friends after breaking up yk? So it's all or nothing…
depends on who makes you feel better, it sounds like you love your gf but it also sounds like you settled, id break up with her personally
Looks like his true red flag self is coming out to play. Run.
Bollocks to that, all kids should be tested at birth tbh. Any woman who gets weird about it is shady. Even if you’ve never had a disloyal thought in your life, you’re telling me that you don’t want to give the man you allegedly love a lifetime of the same peace of mind that you have?
Firstly it isn’t a gear cupboard. Do you know how rinks are built? They most likely have 2 separate gendered bathrooms as clearly stated in the post.
Do you know how fucking impossible it is to put on hockey in a bathroom stall? Give me a break.
The rink is probably used for children sports too where they will legally need separate locker rooms.
What? Why would children “legally” need separate rooms?
And even if not a rink will have home and guest lockers rooms, which during practice would be male and female locker rooms if you’ve ever played on coed teams for anything.
No, the home change room will be for one team, and the away for the other. Do you seriously think the girls from both teams and the guys from both teams are changing together? Fucking ridiculous.
And we don’t know if there are 10 other women or just the 1, but we know there’s atleast one and she is separating herself from other women on purpose.
Yea, maybe her bf is also a controlling, insecure asshole.
Saw this sort of mind games used on my ex a lot she was a people pleaser and she just wouldn’t accept she was being manipulated. Like she had a guy threatening to kill himself (or me!) And she’d have to fix it. why HIS friends said so also told her not to tell me because I might go to the police and he wouldn’t cope in jail.
While asking the question, the only thing I had in mind is if it was the best time with me. After the silence, I realised he was thinking about his past experiences.
By “things you have to accept” I mean accept that she has had very satisfying and memorable sexual experiences before OP. That doesn’t mean that that sexual experience is cemented as the best she ever WILL have.
Engaged?????…they did the marriage after six months. SMH
They probably engaged one month after they met.
Divorce within 18 months fits about right.
That's American females for you, America has sexual hang ups about everything.
Cut your friend out of your life and mind your own business
I also didn't say he should engage the authorities, only that it sure looks a lot like asking for help.
I didn't say anything about the authorities. Yes, I said Op can report her but I meant it as in the Original post; He wanted to report her to the School Counsellor Administration is where I was going with that.
reaching out for help,
That's medical help. Which, to be fair to me is a different cry for help. She was in need of medical care, and asked for medical help. That is a type of help but not the same type that OP wants.
I understand where you are coming from, but the way I read and understood it was that she was asking for strictly medical help, and nothing more. She wasn't asking OP to help her get out of a DV situation, nor was she asking him to help her with food. With that she needs to ask for that specific type of help, but she didn't. OP wants to help her in a way she didn't ask for, and unwanted help is typically more hurtful than helpful.
“Edit: We've been talking and he's agreed not to see her until he's told her about me. I'm still not going home tonight.”
Oh, I totally WOULD. Check if he really stays home.
He can tell about anything to you and go anyways although he tells you he won't go!
If you’re not willing to be a father if she gets pregnant, stop having sex with her. Condoms fail. Pre-cum can contain sperm. Your reflexes might not be as quick as you think they are when it’s time to pull out.
Stop entertaining her.
Start putting your energy into other things and people that get results
Yes you should. Either way he's going to be hurting because you don't feel the same but he'll be alright.
I mean it depends on what you're putting out there. I doubt they think you're actually a murderer…but if you're really intense right away or something like that they may be cautious
You growing up with an alcoholic and then suggesting a stable man leaves an innocent child in this situation says a lot about your character.
I know a lot of people in long-term open relationships that work for them. If both partners agree to whatever the boundaries are and stick to them, that’s the key. When one violates the boundaries they’ve agreed upon together, not so much.
Anyway, you’re welcome to your opinion and judgement.
There's no perfect time to have a baby. You can try to make the situation better, of course, but a lot of people use that excuse to delay the situation.
Thank you. I just can’t help but overthink things like this
When I was younger I never would want to date or drink or have sex
You're 20. When you were younger you were a literal child.
Don't marry him! What other advice can you possibly hoping to get here?
It’s a great relationship… except…. He’s a serial cheater, he’s not remorseful, he’s emotionally detached, he won’t communicate , he’s not showing affection/love…. That is not a “great relationship “- like at all!!! Get some self respect, stop letting people treat you like garbage. Block him and work on yourself