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Birth Date: 2004-03-10
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the assumptions and judgements and pitchforks say more about the commenters than they do the situation at hand.
She didn't put in the 'passed out' and 'drunk' parts until after I expressed suspicion about her post. And I expected that to be her response.
you should be more alarmed. your responses are… ew. you say u grew up poor but actually can’t see the problems or don’t care enough. just that it “makes you feel uneasy”. feeling uneasy is like, the least of what you should feel imo esp with your background. hell, i didn’t have your background and i feel like your bf is a piece of shit ??♀️
No one owes you closure. That one is on you.
You sound exhausting. If you’re needing to have such challenging discussions at this stage because it’s not working for you, just walk away next time. People aren’t projects. The purpose of dating is to see if it’s a good fit. This wasn’t by your own words.
It seems like you want what you want when you want it and how you want it and there’s really no room for anything else. If it was so important to you have a talk, you could have chosen one of the times he proposed, skipped the gym even. But nah, you want him to jump through hoops. Yikes.
Yeah I get that. I've never been able to hurt people, even if they have been incredibly nasty to me, I put up with so much bullshit from my previous boss because I was too scared to even say “Hey, I'm really upset and need a break”. Same with exes, I've never in my life felt safe to set boundaries or tell someone if they upset or offended me. I've never raised my voice in my life.
I'll try find some therpay first, one step at a time I guess. Thank you for the encouragement.
For the accounts I’ve suggested we each have our own account to spend whatever we want on and then one joined that we use for bills or anything needed for the house.
Yeah, this would be the end for me. Really shows the light he sees you in; disloyal, dishonest, untrustworthy. What’s next, he’s going to accuse you of stealing from him? Some other awful thing that he conjured up? Jeez.
Tell her that part of beauty comes from the inside and that she ought to focus on that part now that she is becoming an adult.
Keep all evidence, video clips etc and keep a diary to document everything also seek legal advice regarding restraining orders etc.
Any advice thank you
He’s narcissistic. Read the book “Why does he do that” by Lundy Bancroft.
This is not what a relationship is supposed to be like. He does not own your body to use at will. You deserve better. Please read that book. It will open your eyes.
I went through decades of pain and abuse because I didn’t know what was normal and not in a relationship. I’ve since educated myself on abusive people and relationships. Save yourself years of pain and educate yourself in abusers now.
Thank you x
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He claims that the friendship was so convoluted and confusing to him and that […]
It's easy to claim things are complicated when they are in fact opposite. The fact it's his ex and not some random person is also a considerable thing. People are wary of exes, at times, with good reason. While you want to make another go of it, do be mindful that the way he's rationalized this isn't exactly owning that bullshit.
Well yeah, if the end of the relationship was amicable then yeah it's not crazy that'd he still be on good terms with the parents, plus we don't know the history of their relationship. We know they dated for 4+ years but we don't know how long he's known the parents, if he's known them for 10 years of course he'll still be on good terms with them.
You are 20 years old, and have been in a relationship with this person since you were 15. You need to be single for a while, find yourself and your own self worth. Love yourself first. This is just general advice.
If you do still love this guy, and want to continue to be with him, it is bad that he didn’t talk about it for four years, but the important part is whether he has continued with the chatting. And from your story it doesn’t seem like it. So maybe he also sees it as a mistake and is fully committed to you now.
Only you can decide whether you can relearn how to trust him. If not, please know that it is perfectly fine to be single.
You were kids when you got together. There is probably an element of seeing what’s out there that’s involved here. Opening up your relationship is not going to solve these problems so your only real choice here is to break up now before he cheats on you or break up after you find out. Either way this relationship seems like it’s over.
Ice breaker.. sent something confusing so you’d have a reason to actually text him
I honestly just wonder about the time based on the tone of the post.
But also makes sense to go slow here, if she like rice, don’t lose it. And walk everyday, now a workout, but a walk. Took me 16 years to make a real decision to take action to lose weight, much more weight than her.
I meant that their was some indications this would happen to her body I guess, idk how to explain it other than from experience this is what it comes to.
How desperate are you? He's very open about things which would give you problems down the line. Is there really much point identifying all the possible problems down the line if you'll just blithely ignore them? Sometimes the process of getting to know someone is to know why NOT to date them, as well as why you would.
Can you hire a nanny to take some of the childcare off of her hands?
Piece of mind is priceless. I never get it why people put up with this none sense. From your post it seems like he is the boyfriend and you are the friend.
Respect yourself and break it off.