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Damn, I couldn’t have said it better myself.
Do it, see if it bothers him.
Proceed out the relationship.
Every marriage has a prenup. If you didn't sign one, you inherit the states prenup and to put it mildly, family law in the west is broken.
It works okay for two people getting married at 20 or with similar incomes. However, for someone in their 30s who has accumulated some wealth relative to their partner it puts all of the financial risk on them.
I think it’s distasteful because that’s simply not what the foundations of marriage are built upon
I think marriage should be built on love and a shared interest in life and children, not on one partner carrying all the financial risk. Quite frankly to refuse to sign a prenup is a major red flag. It signals that you very much are aware of the financial windfall and will only proceed if it is in place for your benefit.
If you truly have no interest in the assets he accumulated prior to the marriage it's a pretty easy thing to sign. That's just where we are in the west these days.
He’s verbally & emotionally abusive. You can’t fix that.
…and automatically asigning extra power to the abuser. Telling the abused “there's no reason to fight for the right thing because he is going to win.” Yikes.