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She’s “married” to another guy and has like kids and stuff.
This. What's the story on this?
Why can’t people just say what they mean?
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That seems very mild and harmless.. I wonder if she is mixing it up with something else…
If you can’t find a positive quality worth staying in the relationship after 8+ years, the answer is yes, these negative qualities (no matter how minor), all piled up together on top of each, are worthy of ending this relationship. It has already gone in far too long. Do not waste your time anymore. Find someone who makes you want to stay with them. Who makes you happy and look towards the future. You two are, at best, dynamically incompatible.
Yeah 🙁 it’s still very fresh
I'm sorry this is happening to you. There's no easy way to do this without support. Abusive relationship is nude tk leave for that reason.
Rather than lying, try breaking up with him a public place. The more people you both know, the better. One common thing most abusers have is they are narcissists, their reputation usually meant everything.
And there is no way to control the intimate photos and videos, so it's better you get your parents' help. Trust me, no decent parents wanna see their kids in this position, LET THEM PROTECT YOU. Ask and they will protect you. Them getting mad at first is a given, don't worry about that.
You're trap because you are isolated. And that is by design of your abuser/s. Involve your family, involve your friends, involve as many common friends and acquaintances as possible, and get a blotter report to the police that this guy is making you feel unsafe. It will not get him in jail, but if anything happens (physical or photo/video leak) the police's eyes will be on him right away.
My husband doesn’t speak to me that way and tells me I’m beautiful. It doesn’t matter what I weigh, what I’m wearing, or what my hair is doing. If he spoke to me the way your bf speaks to you, I would’ve left him.
Is he fucking joking? Please leave him now. He’s already testing the waters, and by staying you already are setting yourself up for being cheated on. Now that’s one thing you’re going to constantly stress about because he he so nonchalantly put it out there. I’m tired of men like him and their bullshit excuses for justifying cheating. He can be single and fuck as many people as he wants to then. Girl, seriously, get out now. The blatant disrespect. If he won’t respect you, respect yourself and walk away from that man child.
Thanks for this. I think he got super excited and it was spur of the moment. We are usually quite good about communicating feelings and boundaries, so this really caught me off guard. I'm so sad but starting to calm down.
Do you think in this scenario, he’d have been wrong to be uncomfortable if his gf was going to sleep on the same bed as a straight male bestie who she grew up with and was platonic with? If you think he should be uncomfortable in that scenario, then you’re not being fair.
I guess in my eyes, people who think this way are not taking a bi couple as serious as a straight couple.
Yes girls sleep in beds together a lot and it’s not seen as weird. I’m 1000% certain that’s the scenario with his gf and her friend. However OP shouldn’t have to “fuck off” for being slightly uncomfortable here. His girlfriend IS bi, meaning she does find females attractive. She is attracted to females and is ok with romantic and sexual relationships with females. Her friend is also bi and attracted to females. Both of these two people could be attracted to one another and are now sleeping on a bed together, which for some is seen as an intimate thing.
Now does OP think that automatically mean she’s going to cheat? Nope. He’s stated that countless of times in his comments. He trusts her. He’s just simply uncomfortable. Which, is fair. And saying it’s not said is saying that a bi/gay couple isn’t as legitimate as a straight couple.
If you look at her post history, yes he is.
So what’s the problem?
“one of us comes from Greece while the other has a turkish background”
…oooooooooh
Yeah, that’s a problem
Sounds like neither one of these guys is “ready for a relationship” (even if one of them gives great penpal). A “love triangle” is when two people actually want to be with you, not when you're having/have had flirtations with people who are clearly still keeping all their options open. Point being, you don't actually have to make a decision here.
OP, if you don’t break up now then you’ll be like me, 2.5 years in and miserable. We barely talk to each other now but are still “together”. At this point he’s like a friend more than anything. The resentment builds up so much that it’s not even worth it for your own feelings.