We invited him because we didn’t want him to be alone and depressed, just looking for ways to stop him making the atmosphere negative. An example would be; if we’re all watching a goofy film and laughing at how daft it is, he huffs and rolls his eyes at us all being too silly. He generally lacks a sense of humour about most things, a goofy film is just one example
I’d rather have advice about how to go about this without dna tests
why? if your husband is the father, a dna test would prove him wrong. the only reason i can think of that you'd want to avoid it is bc you actually are sleeping with his brother….or this whole thing is fake and you're bored
So he’s known her since he was 12? Give me a fucking break. And the whole “she’s one of the guys” thing is total shit—unless he makes a habit of telling his dudes they all look beautiful, too. If she were really just “one of the guys,” he wouldn’t have felt the need to hide any of this from you. Have you even met this so-called lifelong friend?
An ultimatum at this point probably won’t do much. He’s already doubling down on not showing you the texts, and by now he’s likely disposed of every last one of them. And even if he does show you, what difference will it make? You already know he’s been lying to you. Plus, he’s still going to see her at work every day, and if you choose to stay, you’re going to have to on-line with the constant worry that he’s still fucking around behind your back. You don’t deserve that.
Be glad you found out about all of this before marrying him.
Always impressed by people here that have no self respect, expecially at 30. If someone cheats on you, you have no kids and are not married, then you leave her ass asap like damn
To be honest I feel like Reddit is massively overreacting here, and your original thoughts on the subject, that it was just a high school joke that worked out, were right on the money. But Reddit loves drama and loves to go straight to the nuclear option and convinced you that was rationalizing this away for him.
When I showed this post to my wife she had the same reaction I did. “Just tell him you know, ask for an explanation, and see if it’s satisfactory. No need to go straight to breaking up without at least talking about it.”
I have a gf who recently said she loves me and I’m like whoa are we there already?? We have lots of affection but “love” means a LOT to me. I’m certainly fond of her and like her a whole lot and think she’s cute but “Love” to me is so much more than that. I just don’t think we know each other well enough for that (though I love that she said it, honestly, good for her being brave and honest and vulnerable). “If I don’t love her, why am I in her life?” Well, I see the very real probability of love in my near future, so why should I bail out now?
new to this sub?
the wildest things get added to other people’s stories
We invited him because we didn’t want him to be alone and depressed, just looking for ways to stop him making the atmosphere negative. An example would be; if we’re all watching a goofy film and laughing at how daft it is, he huffs and rolls his eyes at us all being too silly. He generally lacks a sense of humour about most things, a goofy film is just one example
And it isn't even just about the finances.
He's lazy and doesn't do chores unless she threatens to break up with him.
I’d rather have advice about how to go about this without dna tests
why? if your husband is the father, a dna test would prove him wrong. the only reason i can think of that you'd want to avoid it is bc you actually are sleeping with his brother….or this whole thing is fake and you're bored
You’re not sure who’s kids they are, are you? You sly dog.
So he’s known her since he was 12? Give me a fucking break. And the whole “she’s one of the guys” thing is total shit—unless he makes a habit of telling his dudes they all look beautiful, too. If she were really just “one of the guys,” he wouldn’t have felt the need to hide any of this from you. Have you even met this so-called lifelong friend?
An ultimatum at this point probably won’t do much. He’s already doubling down on not showing you the texts, and by now he’s likely disposed of every last one of them. And even if he does show you, what difference will it make? You already know he’s been lying to you. Plus, he’s still going to see her at work every day, and if you choose to stay, you’re going to have to on-line with the constant worry that he’s still fucking around behind your back. You don’t deserve that.
Be glad you found out about all of this before marrying him.
We don’t know that she will feel that way. It’s possible she no longer cares at all for OP. Either way giving her a heads up txt is probably sensible.
I’m a family law attorney and based on the info in the post, I would assume the mother’s parental rights are intact.
Do you want her to treat any male children you might have like this??! Because she absolutely will.
Always impressed by people here that have no self respect, expecially at 30. If someone cheats on you, you have no kids and are not married, then you leave her ass asap like damn
Thank you x
To be honest I feel like Reddit is massively overreacting here, and your original thoughts on the subject, that it was just a high school joke that worked out, were right on the money. But Reddit loves drama and loves to go straight to the nuclear option and convinced you that was rationalizing this away for him.
When I showed this post to my wife she had the same reaction I did. “Just tell him you know, ask for an explanation, and see if it’s satisfactory. No need to go straight to breaking up without at least talking about it.”
People feel things on different timelines.
I have a gf who recently said she loves me and I’m like whoa are we there already?? We have lots of affection but “love” means a LOT to me. I’m certainly fond of her and like her a whole lot and think she’s cute but “Love” to me is so much more than that. I just don’t think we know each other well enough for that (though I love that she said it, honestly, good for her being brave and honest and vulnerable). “If I don’t love her, why am I in her life?” Well, I see the very real probability of love in my near future, so why should I bail out now?