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Thank you so much for your kind words. I really needed them!
Thats terrifying lol
Yeah. This is entirely r/thathappened ?. I can’t believe people are actually believing this.
The first step into improving your life is staying true to your word and seeing what crumbles around you
Woah, this seems a lot, I urge you to take care of yourself and your mental health first before caring for someone who seems too toxic from your description. You only have one life, I would suggest to get away from any drama that would break you down. I know a relationship is about compassion and accommodating each other. But I don’t feel it’s a two way thing in your case. Either make sure she takes steps to cure her issues or stay away from this ‘seems to be’ self absorbed person.
Get out. Duh. This guy's gross.
Your penis size is safely in the range where you don't need to worry about it (or, IMHO, talk about it). A lot of women don't climax during every sexual encounter, and a lot of sex is not particularly skilled, but people come back for more if everything else is good.
My advice: you've prepared as much as you can for the sexual encounter itself (though yes, practice good hygiene). Remember that beyond the sex you're interacting with a person. Make sure you remember that in the moment: prioritize making her feel comfortable, valued, liked, listened to…all that stuff.
Good luck.
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You two are adults. Communicate. Ask her exactly what type of relationship she wants, and what her bounderies are. If she doesn't know, then I recommend dropping her as a friend.
I don't consider myself narrow minded at all. Maybe its just a modern way of your friend saying she likes to fuck multiple partners. A new word for an old practice
And if you are ok with it all, then fine. Whatever suits everyone involved
Unless MIL is likely to me a major purchaser of your academic publications, then I'd let it go. I'd totally ignore it. If shes anything like me, she'll be getting a kick out of making you rise to the bait.
I find the towels hilarious and at some point in your future you might get the opportunity to retaliate in some form. If you plan on having family, it would be unfortunate if the grand children knew her as 'gammy' or something she wasnt fond of.
If that's not a possibility then you can develop your own 'pet' name for her, now that you are family. Imagine writing your Thank you cards to Maw Maw or some such. Theres a world of opportunity here to fight fire with fire.
Making a huge fuss over this could end in offending your husband at some point. While I'm sure he is happy to observe your choice, it is still his name after all and a constant stream of fuss over it could lead to irritation.
More fun to take the subtle approach. A person of your talents should be able to come up with a suitable counter.
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You're absolutely right, i did say i didnt want to ask my wife to sacrifice time with her family, especially as she may not see them for another year.
Im just worried as i love my wife dearly no matter how many headaches she gives me and have taken on a fair ammount of debt so we can afford a immigration lawyer and build a life together, i want her to come back alive and well and not in the mourge.
I showed my wife my post and expressed my feelings, she said she will be okay and not to worry.
But its very hot not to with the way that vehicle is driven
Actually, I believe there were more than that single comment I was responding to.
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Go for it. Defend yourself and show them your boundaries!
Unstable mental health seems to be a prerequisite for polyamory. It's little wonder that you would be drawn to it…
How do you know he won’t do the same? Talking about it isn’t doing it. You can want that for yourself and your plans may or may not come to fruition, he might not plan it yet take the opportunity if it arises. He’s only been in the post 6 months, is that right? Perhaps he just needs to have the experience of working first, especially if he spent a long time as a carer to his grandmother.
Redditors aren’t being unkind at all, they’re pointing out that your boyfriend said something dumb and inappropriate, and it doesn’t mean your dad is a homophobe who doesn’t support you. Maybe he does have an issue with your sexuality, who knows, but his reaction there, or even his attitude before that (maybe he was having a bad day or just doesn’t like your boyfriend’s vibes) isn’t an indication of it.
I’m sorry but as a gay™️, this is hilarious
My guy… If you think therapy is just “talking”, then you truly are a prisoner in your own head. ? You're self conscious enough to know you give school shooter vibes. It's not because you're lonely or “ugly”, it's because you expose yourself to the absolute worst the society has to offer (TikTok etc.) and then choose to believe you need to either conform to that or reject society. You set yourself up for failure. Only you can get yourself out of this situation. Stop sulking and worrying your parents and talk to a professional who won't just medicate you, but will actually help you stop this vicious circle.
Wait, did you ever ask her out on a date? So she said ‘no’ and remained your crush? Could you explain?
It's a setup, she is trying to steal the house from you. Only communicate through a lawyer.
Your Dad is a man baby. You are a grown ass woman, the fact he believes it's his place to tell you who you can have a relationship with speaks volumes. I can already tell that your Dad had made being a cop a personality trait. If your boyfriend makes you happy and cares about you, that is more important than your Dad's fragile ego.
Married with kids? I lean towards not contacting her. If you do keep it short and clean.
YES. Leave him immediately.
“If I didn't monitor him well enough” this sentence right here might help you understand what people are saying OP. It's clear your expectations of your partner are high, but from this sentence I'm getting the impression you hold yourself to a similar kind of standard in some ways.
So one thing I would really encourage you to start researching and discussing in therapy is codependency, because it sounds like you and your partner might be struggling with this.
In short although it's good to support eachother and be there for your partner, there is a point at which you can overshoot and cross over into codependency, which is an unhealthy mindset towards relationships.
Essentially you shouldn't feel like your partner is responsible for managing you or your feelings and behaviour because it stops you from holding yourself accountable and that stops you from growing as a person. And you shouldn't feel like you have to manage him or his behaviour and feelings, because that can enable unhealthy behaviour (like binge drinking) and can lead to feeling like you can't trust your partner or their judgement. If you think you have to monitor his drinking that means you don't feel like you can trust him to correctly judge when he's had enough.
This doesn't necessarily mean you two should break up, but it does sound like you need to evaluate your relationship dynamic and it sounds like maybe it's time for some self reflection too. This isn't a criticism, it's meant as advice. Learn to focus on being responsible for yourself, and allow your boyfriend to be responsible for his own decisions, especially when he drinks.
You can't solve each others problems. That's not your job. Your job is to look after yourself and find a partner that knows how to look after themselves too. Only then will you have a strong and stable foundation of trust and mutual respect, and once you have that you can hold eachother accountable on the rare occasion someone slips up or acts in a way that isn't ideal.
Damn y'all invented time travel?? R word is a slur since it's conception. How is it not disrespectful exactly?
I’d say don’t be nice, as being nice seems to encourage her to feel safe to be mean, be civil but also aloof. And people like her often don’t do that with everyone, just with people that make them feel insecure. So you could have done something that hurt her or she could just be jealous, or likes you, or some other random reason like you remind her if an ex bf. The issue here is if you did hurt her, emotionally stable adults talk to each other to work out problems, they don’t just act out meanly. So even if you did upset her, that’s on her to tell you, not on you to guess.
Oh so the posts she makes about toxic exes and trauma bonds is probs to do with him. But then they wouldn’t have stayed friends if that’s the case right?
Absolutely not. Anytime she gets bored/lonely/feels lack of attention, she while reach back out.
Just move on and get someone who isn’t attached to their any ex.
What for “on campus, he can’t come to me when I’m with friends” mean?
He won’t physically wake up and talk to you?
Just leave
Maybe he doesn’t want to come over. Maybe he does. Just ask him
There are many different strains of HPV – the vaccine covers multiple. Everyone should get the vaccine.
That show is amazing (except for season 4). I was really happy in season 1 to see Jessica Biel bust out with some real acting chops. She killed it in Candy, too. Maybe she’s found her niche in psychological horror? Obviously, the rest of the cast kills it, too. Season 3 (the one you’re referring to, for those that haven’t watched) was definitely the most mind-bending, imo.
That's creepy as hell. He should be reported for kidnapping/illegal detainment. That is not a trust exercise!
Same. My wife actively uses my phone. We share a laptop with all our passwords saved. I have 2 other PCs in the house that have no locked passwords.
We also never go through each other's private conversations… It's called respecting your partner
Okay, two things.
She 100% was having an emotional affair with Elmer, and part of her concern about this is her projecting on you.
And you are not working on this with your wife. You describe her as nagging, and not as a team member. Regardless of whether or not you’re having an emotional fair, you’re being driven away from your wife.
If you want to save your marriage, I would tell Edwina you need to stop seeing her while you salvage your relationship with your wife. And I would insist that you do marriage counseling with your wife.
Do not leave the house.
I want to as I mentioned as that has always been something I wanted to do all my life. But I can't since I mentioned I'm unable to find a job, until then I'm broke. Not even here in this and not even internationally as my CV doesn't even make past the shortlisting phase to end up in the interview rounds despite of my good GPA and academic activities in college.
I'm trying to re-write a novel, a first in the triology of books I had planned. I was rejected by a lot of publishers during lockdown in 2020 when I was still in college.
Therefore I revamped the whole story as a reboot and that is my last straw. I don't think they will accept my manuscript again thid time as it requires a talent agency and estabilished authors and recommendations etc but that is my final hope. If that goes well, I might be able to move out, although I cannot say that with certainity as anything could happen and my bad luck could keep getting worse.
Eh, I think if he complains about the gym thing, the best answer is to invite him along. He most likely won't accept, but if he won't join you, he has no grounds to complain.
You've made positive changes and I think he's insecure that you'll find someone better or more attractive than him now.
His attitude about this entire thing is gross and unsupportive. You could try couples counseling, but I feel like it's a huge issue if he can't even be happy and supportive of the person he loves. I think his buddies are probably placing things in his head too. That's a very common culprit I've noticed.
So.. invite him to the gym. Ask for couples counseling so that you can get to the bottom of his insecurities and express how upsetting it is that he can't be supportive of your goals.
If couples counseling doesn't change anything, tell him that you're done. You need a partner, not someone that's going to make you feel like crap for levelling up in life.
he knows he's making you uncomfortable. you don't need to make excuses for him he is genuinely being a creep.
How tf does an 18 year old even end up getting in bed with a 37 year old
Like what possessed you
Unfortunately, to get over this mess, you need to break up, and completely cut contact with her. It might cost you a lot of time, and effort to build life without present, but it will be life in which you can be happy. Life with her will only make you miserable. The longer you wait, the more you will suffer.
awesome.
I personally think he’s a POS and very crafty at not crossing boundaries in an obvious way. he has no business DMing your friend when he has a GF. absolutely calculating, disgusting, and overall ridiculous. that sh*t would have me fuming as well. your self restraint is impressive.
good luck with continuing to hold your tongue. you’re a kind friend for her having her back even if it’s behind the scenes. it’s info you can give her if she comes to you in the future.
so he was cheating on you?
My husband has taken them before. I will say that while he does have a brusk personality, the pills definitely got rid of any social filter he may have had. I had to get rid of them myself.