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  1. Honestly I’d take a step back and reevaluate. Why does he think it’s ok to borrow such a large amount and forget to tell you the details? How is his living in the moment going to affect your marriage going forward? Who will be responsible for the household bills? Will you have complete joint accounts or personal accounts with a shared household account? How often will he need to borrow to pay his bills. What will this look like when you have kids and have to leave the workforce if you choose to stay home and care for them? (Those last few are very specific because I know someone in my life who was screwed in this scenario)

    This is for the down payment for the house. It’s a big purchase. What are his plans down the line for other major money decisions? Buying a rental home, replacing the roof, paying for the children’s tuition. Is he just going to tell you he can handle his half and you find out at the end that he was relying on his brother?

    Can you trust that you are going into this marriage with someone who respects you and your joint financial decisions? What will it take to keep this from popping up in the back of your head wondering what the next payment will affect? What happens if something catastrophic happens and one of you loses your job or ability to work? Will you still be able to make the payment to both his brother and the bank? Does this make his brother part owner of the home? How is his brother or his family about money? Are they the type to give freely or will they hold it over your head? How comfortable will you be attending Sunday dinner with the family knowing that you are sitting across from a man to whom you owe one hundred and fifty thousand dollars.

    These are just the things that popped up in my own head. Maybe he comes from a rich family and they’re just rolling in the dough. Maybe this is a drop in the bucket. Maybe it’s not.

    Either way y’all need to do a deep dive on what your financial future looks like. Pick up some books and do deep research. Good luck.

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