My (23f) boyfriend (29m) wakes me up a million times a night trying to have sex. I’m exhausted and cranky. How do I stick up for myself on this and frame the discussion in a way that doesn’t make him feel hurt?

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So we recently moved in together. We've been dating for two years. This is really my only big issue. I'm starting to feel mentally foggy and drained. I barely get any sleep.

A few times a night, in his sleep he will try to have sex with me. I've woken up to hands down my pants. Sometimes he'll be gripping my neck. Pressing himself into my pajamas. If I sleep without bottoms on, I will sometimes wake up to him poking the tip inside me. I've woken up because he is on top of me and since he's dead asleep, his entire weight is on me and I can barely breathe or move.

I will then wake up, and try to get his attention to stop. Usually he wakes up violently and starts yelling at me but stops and goes back to sleep. Then I will wake up to the same in another couple hours.

I've had several conversations with him about wanting to sleep on the guest bed and he starts freaking out because he thinks that means I don't love him anymore. He's convinced our relationship will end of I sleep in a different bed. A few nights ago I slept on the guest bed anyway and woke up to him getting in bed with me.

Idk if I just need to be more firm, if I should ask him to see a doctor, or what. Other than this, our relationship is good. Besides the fact that I'm often cranky from getting no sleep at night.

submitted by /u/Throwra89005
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