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Model from: fr
Languages: fr
Birth Date: 1996-09-30
Body Type: bodyTypeThin
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
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Eyes color: eyeColorHazel
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To play a bit of devil's advocate, why 3 years? Why not 2 years and 9 months? Why not 4 years?
I don't think it is so much about time as it is about having the time to learn about the other. So focus on learning about one another. Have the hard talks about kids, money, politics, values, religion and so on.
At 10 months into a relationship you are past a bit of the initial infatuation phase and have started to see some things in the other that are less than absolutely ideal. Can you live with that Every Single Day for the rest of your life? Does she squeeze the toothpaste from the middle of the tube? Or worse, does she hang the toilet paper the wrong way (under is wrong, of course)?
How do each of you deal with it when the other expresses criticism? Can you fight fair? Can both of you just shut the hell up long enough to listen to the other when they are saying something you might not like?
Where do you see yourself in five years? No, really, where? Do you assume you will always live in the city where you are now? Does she want to move to some horrible place that would be unacceptable to you?
10 months isn't too short for some. 10 years isn't long enough for others. Don't spend your life staring at dates on a calendar and focus instead of the points of potential conflict that really matter.
His wife knows about it, they have consensual sex outside marriage. They used to date when they were younger and was able to be seduced when they met later on in life.
thank you
OP, is there anyone else that can back up what your boyfriend is saying? Because if you have no idea where those words came from, then you might not have even said them.
Punishments are never a part of a healthy, adult relationship. If you're mad at your partner for something, you talk about your feelings (use “I statements” – e.g. “When you do/say X, I feel like Y…”) and then you work out a solution to the issue and how to prevent it from happening again.
I have a hunch that your boyfriend is doing this on purpose. There's a couple of reasons he might be doing this:
1) He wants to break up, but is too p*ssy to do it the old fashioned way – so he's making you feel shitty, which will make you dislike him enough so that maybe you'll leave him.
2) He's negging you. This is where a person makes another person feel bad about themselves in some way, so that they stick around because they believe they can't do any better. It's common for guys to give back-handed compliments to their female partners, for example, to make them feel too ugly to get anyone else. Thus, they stay with the guy, even if he starts behaving like an ass.
I feel like option 2 is more likely, as he knows now that you're desperate to keep the relationship with him, by any means possible.
He fabricated an incident where you messed up, you then try to “make it up to him” by doing all this nice stuff, AND he can set a precedent where he talks down to you as a “punishment”. It'll start as a short-term punishment, then he'll keep extending it, and finally you'll get used to it.
This is how severe abuse and DV starts. Get out, NOW.
Change how you talk about your body to your bf. It's obvious that you have insecurities about your body, so try saying “Can you reassure me that you find my body attractive?” It seems like that's what you need, so just ask for it.
I love Cali Reggae and the music and people have the best vibe. I've made friends, there's concerts, so much positivity. Facebook, Instagram and Reddit, shout out to r/CaliReggae, have so much to offer. I listen to Stick Figure and SOJA so beautiful. Follow Kyle Smith, god he hustles, hardworking, talented. Brendan Clemente and his big heart and killing it on the Making Friends tour. Find your passion, and live.
What the hell does being vegan have to do with being „anti abortion“?
it's a knife. a big knife but just a knife. What's scary about it?
Self Defense is a basic human right and criminals will have knives, guns, tazers, etc.
What are you going to do for the 45 minutes it takes a cop to get to your house when someone with a knife shows up? entertain them over tea?
She should not make this relationship “permanent” if she has those thoughts. Marriage won't fix those problems, it might get worse. So tell her, be honest and support her. There's a 50/50 risk she might be mad at you but at least you tried. She should not marry this guy with these thoughts in her head.
That is 100% too much to ask. Super unreasonable and unrealistic. Any man who tells you he only jerks off to you and you alone is lying. Even the most innocent man is still gonna crank it in the shower to the nude blonde with the fat ass in the grocery store lineup.
You don’t need any help from us?
You seem to know what your issues are.
Start being better to this poor girl or let her go.
Do self reflection, understand your own short comings and make a conscious effort to grow as a person before you break this girls heart.
Congrats Momma on your new child.
well that victim mentality is for sure not gonna help you find a relationship
It's abuse because he knows it gives you that reaction, and he does it anyway, then twists and manipulates you into it being your fault somehow.
Lol I get that. Luckily my hubby and I were both obviously on the same page when we got together.
Dignity? Happiness? Someone who loves me? Someone my age?
I guess grab the stash. But I would pick happiness first tbh.
Why haven’t you outright discussed the future you want and the future he wants. If they don’t match then you aren’t compatible.
He’s been telling you what he wants and ignoring it, not discussing it but staying with him, is giving mixed messages.
INFO: When you try to help, what exactly are you saying/doing?
Also, ” have to bite my tongue to cushion the reason shes not doing well.”, what would you say is the reason she is not doing well?
You're not happy and it doesn't seem you imagine it changing for the better with him. Also, he is likeky to get hurt but you can't avoid it. Plus if he finds out one day on his own that you don't like him that much it will be more devastating. Tell him and hopefully whatever you arrange for your future would be more enjoyable and lasting
If it was the other way around I wouldn't have an issue. I have some hobbies that I enjoy doing so I'd be able to fill my time there. I think we both struggle with how much time we need with each other. She needs more than I do it seems. I would say we spend most of our free time together and I enjoy doing so. I think my worry is that 'most' will turn into 'all.'
This is like a meme about someone being pissed that the person they are with cheated on them in a dream. A dream and this person is ready to nuke your relationship. Good to know he feels his time is so precious.
Her boyfriend could not realize having sex with an unconscious person who couldn't consent wasn't okay?
If you're having trouble articulating something, just ask ChatGPT!
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My 40-F husband 41-M have been together 17 years, and married for 13. When I graduated university I wanted to get a tattoo of a very specific thing that related to my time there. However, it then comes out that he doesn’t like tattoos and doesn’t find them attractive on women; so I put that thought aside and moved on, yet didn’t forget about getting one. We’ll recently I turned the big 4-0 and it’s come up again. My husband is angry with me and I want to go through with it. Oh wise fellow people of Reddit, please help!
I would discuss this with husband in a similar way that you’ve written this post: you worked hot this week, you only had one day off, he agreed to stay with you, he was unable to say no to a friend, he left you. Do you think he has the capability of recognizing how his actions made you feel?
Live can work fine if it’s video which basically all teletherapy would be. But church-based can generally be less effective.
The standards women set for men these days. SMH