Really wish half the other comments could realize this instead of, “hE's a RiGHt wINg nUTjOb rADicALiZinG YoUr sOn”. People are allowed to think differently; the real issue here is the content the uncle sent the son.
I am 70 years old. I collect social security and I work a part time job so I can eat and keep the lights on.
When I was 60, I got 2 jobs, working 55+ hours a week, one job was minimum wage. It was hardest on the weekends when I worked both jobs, 16 hour days. I lived in the basement (it was a nice basement) of a friend's house.
If you and sibs start giving her money now, it will never end. I had an absolutely inept egg donor who was constantly hitting me up for money. It went on for 20 years until I had enough and said “No”.
Your mother sucked the life out of your childhood and she will continue to do so IF YOU ALLOW IT! The best thing to do is not to start giving her anything more than info for her to take care of herself. She is the perpetual victim and will create whatever sob story she needs to get you to support her. She needs a job. Walmart is always hiring!
Give her a list of local public service agencies she can contact. At minimum, if she has no income, she will qualify for food stamps.
Her message was rife with guilt and manipulation. Don't respond with anything more than “So sorry (not sorry) but I am not in a position to loan you any money.” Or ignore her, but do not give her money.
Again, that is so sexist to assume that any woman with a man is just after his money. No. I am not a sugar baby. No he is not my “sugar daddy”. Grow up
In other words the wife is cheating. Well high probability. This is whag the op intuition is telling him. New friends usually mean this. People don’t magically gain new friends. See. This too many times.
Technically, in the conservative and tradition world, the woman’s family does pay for the wedding. So it’s not way out of left field for him to bring it up.
Why have you met her parents if this is just casual.
I think it will be very difficult to have a friendship with her father but a purely sexual relationship with her.
You need to just tell her that you are not interested in a relationship right now but would be happy to keep hooking up if she’s interested, but that you understand if she’s not. Then you have to let her choose, respect her decision, and accept that your golfing days with dad are likely over
Sequester her if you will and tell her you know what's going on.
If you've done any research about cheating and discovery of such behavior she will deny and then trickle truth you. Say things like it's not serious and they're just friends etc. You might never hear the full extent of it. But if you want to have a lark, call the number with her on speakerphone and tell her affair partner that you know what's going on and that the gig is up and you want to know everything. They may just hang up on you but it will probably ruin the relationship. Either way your relationship is probably trashed. Sorry. Good luck.
Really wish half the other comments could realize this instead of, “hE's a RiGHt wINg nUTjOb rADicALiZinG YoUr sOn”. People are allowed to think differently; the real issue here is the content the uncle sent the son.
Because they aren't happy with it
I am 70 years old. I collect social security and I work a part time job so I can eat and keep the lights on.
When I was 60, I got 2 jobs, working 55+ hours a week, one job was minimum wage. It was hardest on the weekends when I worked both jobs, 16 hour days. I lived in the basement (it was a nice basement) of a friend's house.
If you and sibs start giving her money now, it will never end. I had an absolutely inept egg donor who was constantly hitting me up for money. It went on for 20 years until I had enough and said “No”.
Your mother sucked the life out of your childhood and she will continue to do so IF YOU ALLOW IT! The best thing to do is not to start giving her anything more than info for her to take care of herself. She is the perpetual victim and will create whatever sob story she needs to get you to support her. She needs a job. Walmart is always hiring!
Give her a list of local public service agencies she can contact. At minimum, if she has no income, she will qualify for food stamps.
Her message was rife with guilt and manipulation. Don't respond with anything more than “So sorry (not sorry) but I am not in a position to loan you any money.” Or ignore her, but do not give her money.
Again, that is so sexist to assume that any woman with a man is just after his money. No. I am not a sugar baby. No he is not my “sugar daddy”. Grow up
In other words the wife is cheating. Well high probability. This is whag the op intuition is telling him. New friends usually mean this. People don’t magically gain new friends. See. This too many times.
One no is all it takes for someone to not be invited to stay. You need to work on the jealousy and insecurity though
OP is going to be the last gf he will have for a very, very long time.
Technically, in the conservative and tradition world, the woman’s family does pay for the wedding. So it’s not way out of left field for him to bring it up.
And the gear that could walk on it's own if it wasn't securely zipped up in the bag!
You might wanna take her to a therapist.
Ypu are being emotionally abused because he cannot control his emotions. You leave is what you do. No partner should make you feel this way.
And the 10 year age gap is a big red flag. Women his age would NOT put up with his tantrums so he targeted you.
Why have you met her parents if this is just casual.
I think it will be very difficult to have a friendship with her father but a purely sexual relationship with her.
You need to just tell her that you are not interested in a relationship right now but would be happy to keep hooking up if she’s interested, but that you understand if she’s not. Then you have to let her choose, respect her decision, and accept that your golfing days with dad are likely over
You're nineteen. You're technically still a teenager. You're gonna look back at this when you're thirty and be so embarrassed.
And the advise you want is?
Set comments to new. Helps me sometimes.
Sequester her if you will and tell her you know what's going on.
If you've done any research about cheating and discovery of such behavior she will deny and then trickle truth you. Say things like it's not serious and they're just friends etc. You might never hear the full extent of it. But if you want to have a lark, call the number with her on speakerphone and tell her affair partner that you know what's going on and that the gig is up and you want to know everything. They may just hang up on you but it will probably ruin the relationship. Either way your relationship is probably trashed. Sorry. Good luck.