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She's cruel and uncaring, and when you try to bring up your issues, she invalidates them. You deserve better.
Ohhh I see sorry I deleted it before you commented i just did a comment on the whole thing instead So she’s making him sleep with her?
Well I am a woman but sure ok
Thanks for your advice, sounds similiar to my thought process. Really appreciated.
I'm glad y'all don't see me as the villain in this situation thank you for answering my question
People like this clown don't give a shit about the effects of rape until it happens to their daughter or wife. I wouldn't waste any more energy talking to him.
She likes you and you are very fortunate. Don’t mess this up. Good luck.
I disagree with you to the fullest. I think what OP did is not cool, and there are boundaries to every relationship. For example you don’t buy a coworker something for $150. But you also don’t go out there and cheat on your boyfriend for it. She could’ve been mature and communicated with him why it made her feel uncomfortable, but she chose to go out there and bang a random dude. I doubt it’s her first time finding a reason to cheat on OP. Run and don’t look back OP. This isn’t normal behavior imo.
Why do guys all think of the same scams smh
Yup, and isn't it interesting how every single religious person has their own moral standard that seems to supraceed the religions moral standard based on their individual circumstances?
I'm not trying to be a dick, but I used to be religious too. What's the point in holding on to belief if your morality is literally better than your religion's morality? God is just the morality of a time long passed, a very useful way to hold people accountable and provide a moral baseline that is now outdated and unnecessary.
I’m calling bullshit on this post, no rational mother of a 4 year old and carrying a baby would go to shooting herself as a response to this.
If this is real then Reddit can’t help you, you need therapy. Not just for addressing your own self worth, but whatever else is going on in your life that’s making you unhappy to take your own life. Also need to address the fact you think that YOU need to apologise as the victim of this.
Bare minimum, no connect with your sister until you help yourself. DON’T APOLOGISE. Go get help!
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I really hope you don’t raise your son to think like this…
If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck then it's probably a duck.
My father knows he doesn't have long. He is already talking to me about selling off some stuff we don't need etc. I'm just afraid of putting it into words.
I don't think you're understanding what their saying. They are saying gay people would never be allowed to share a locker room together by the same logic that says this woman can't be in there with men.
They are calling it out as ridiculous, as it is
Saying no to sex because you don’t want to have sex is not manipulative. Just let him know you aren’t feeling up for sex and that you want to spend some time just connecting as a couple emotionally.
Hold her to it. If she doesn't change by X, you leave. Let her know ow how much time you are giving her.
Hold her to it. If she doesn't change by X, you leave. Let her know ow how much time you are giving her.
Sometimes people need to be dealt with a little harshly. I have a friend, 22 and a few months ago she dated a 40 year old colleague and it was like a reddit post in real life – told her how mature she was for her age, we have a real connection blah blah. Anyway dude turned out to be a complete douche and had already slept with another 23 year old from the office and was just doing the rounds. Anyway we all told her when she met him, but maybe we were too polite about it
It’s the same thing.
Agreed. Honestly if I were her, I probably thought wearing more than boxers around my daughter would have been a no brainer. She probably didn’t even think it would need a discussion. Never assume though.
I liked him. But, my friends said he might see what I said I’m a bad light and not see me as a serious person to date.
I did consider the caveat and that is also one of the reasons I ask. As lovely as it sounds I don’t think that is a possibility and I think between that and the mental state has led me to this decision tbh
So you got drunk, made a jackass of yourself, and somehow he is the bad guy? Op wtf are you smoking? Cause I'd love something to take me to another reality
You don't have to cut her out completely, but some time apart here would be useful. Tell her you need some space for a bit and start pursuing friends and girlfriends away from your friend. Hopefully over time you will be able to return to her after having moved on. You will move on, but you will have to make a concerted effort to do so. Stop feeding your crush.
So because she's nice to you sometimes, you're happy to be miserable the rest of the time?
Is your relationship good, happy and healthy at least 80% of the time? Not before, not when you first got together, but now?
People have a habit of being on their best behaviour, or love bombing even at the start of a relationship. Then after a few months (or only 1 in your case) the real them comes out.
It's up to you to judge, but if you're hanging round for when she goes back to how she used to be, you'll die waiting. Hopefully that's not the case here.
•The thing is he is physically affectionate with me on and off he can do it for a bit and then push me off and well sometimes I try to hug him and he pushes me off, it’s not really forced king physical contact is just normal stuff that I think I’m allowed to do in a relationship like a random cheek kiss or a random hug.
•I don’t have a disability that prevents me for doing the chores I do all of the cleaning of the house except for some of the trash which sometimes it’s furniture since we just moved were trashing old one and changing it for new one, I don’t think I would be able to lift some pieces of it if I lived alone probably would need someone else. Other than that I can do every chore by myself. I think it’s fair he takes out the trash at times when I do the whole house cleaning plus cook for him
•Also yeah I agree it doesn’t make him more likely to cheat yet then again he downloaded Grindr while we were dating and got a premium sub for it for 4 months I found out a month ago or so and have talked to him about if he was gay and he said no that he only liked girls I promised to support him and he still denied it, he goes out with that friend at least twice a week and I don’t want to get jealous or anything but they always do stuff together and when I talk to him about stuff I’m interested in he literally says that he is cooler also btw he remembers his friends birthday and full name ( he’s known him for 2 months ) and not mine and we’ve been dating for 3 years
I think that if I ask someone to not do something multiple times and they keep doing it, that 1. (assuming it's a reasonable request), they don't respect me, and 2. they're being an asshole who purposely does something they know I don't like.
I don't date people when there is no mutual respect involved, and I don't date assholes. Sometimes, unfortunately, those cards aren't shown until further into the relationship.
Stay? And she knows she has 'won' and will continue to bother you with that, and probably find other things as she thinks are funny and game play. Are you able to not give a shit anymore?
Leave? And you're standing up for yourself. It's telling her that you get to determine the way you allow yourself to be treated.
Get a lawyer and send your ex a “cease and desist”. Your friends can be witnesses of the lies he is telling.
He should be scared by getting that and hopefully will stop.
Also, tell your friends the truth about what a horrible guy he is and that you do not have cancer!
When it comes to “Mental Health Therapy”, it very often is “You get what you paid for”. If you are shopping at the “Dollar Discount” for therapy, you'll likely be switching therapists, or be getting poor therapy.
See if you can find someone from another connection/friend. The type of therapist that someone has been dealing with for years. They likely have a lot of good experience, and maybe they can offer an affordable price. But shopping the Google list for the cheapest rates is likely just going to be throwing the cash down the drain.
This and if you are forced to marry this woman take every measure possible to not have children.
As a mother myself this breaks my heart. I've never seen my children as an investment. My dreams for them are to be and do better than I have. I want them to be happy. I am so sorry you're going through this OP. I wish you the best of luck and please keep us updated.
Sometimes you have to put that trust into practice. You either believe she can handle herself as a being with agency and the ability to choose what she does or you don't. If you can't trust her then end the relationship now before your anxiety spirals even further, I suppose.
She lied because she felt you thought you were entitled to her story. You are not, as you seem to know, that assumption could have come from her old relationship.
What do you mean “hell no”, isn’t that kinda the same thing? Because it’s your sister in law and you see her regularly?
Let her go – she made her decision and you should respect it.
Did you agree on whether it was allowed to see other people?
Respectfully… find your spine and dump him.
You’ve accepted this for this long so take control of your life and don’t let him rob another day from you.
If you don’t then there’s no room to complain.
How long ago was the conversation in insta?
If your work environment is that hostile, I would brush up my resume and look for another job. Preferably with a real HR department, that cares about the well-being of ALL their employees.
Buddy, she's hunting for that fucking perfecto Five-course meal type Herculean Dude with the nuclear powered submarine cock. But sees you as “the practical choice.” The chicken ?fried steak with fries ? dinner guy with the needle dick.
If I were you. You need to wonder if she is shopping for your replacement or has someone in mind. Her words describing you as practical aren't really reassuring and projecting great confidence in the relationship. She's exhibiting red flaggish behavior. Take heed and tread lightly. She'll could drop you in a blink of an eye. To her, that would be the “practical” thing to do.
It’s 2023 ask him to marry you