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Life isn’t all about relationships. Trust me. Everyone on this forum including me has put way too much emphasis on romantic relationships.
Soooo serious question: Why don’t you just turn tables on him right off the bat. For instance, You know when I asked you not to look at that woman’s chest, I caught you starring for long periods of times. I almost had to wipe the drool off your mouth! You know how hurtful that is to me?? (this is where you turn tables!!) I swear, I hate myself. I’m just not good enough. I wish I go to sleep and never wake up!” (See what I did there?). Turn the tables… and if he tries to turn them on you, you say no no no!! IM THE BAD PERSON! And you walk away not allowing him to console you right then and there unless he chases after you. Whatever you do, keep the table turned…
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It’s pathetic doing so much for a man that treats you worse than a dog. You’re so much more capable than that. You keep talking about physical labor like there isn’t jobs you can do where you’re required to do zero.
Gross, you thought this baby would be your one way ticket to dependa status. This poor kid doesn’t stand a chance.
The only reason is because the pregnancy is happening in their body and every person has the right to bodily autonomy. If men where the ones with the uterus and the ability to give birth, then it would be the mans choice entirely.
This detail is really important. Your wife does has a reason to be uncomfortable with her house being messy around your mom because your mom has judged her in the past. Your mom may have only taken a judgey tone with her directly a couple times, but I’m sure your wife has picked up on her old school beliefs in many other ways. If you are admitting that your mom has judged your wife for not being a traditional woman who does all the cooking and cleaning, trust me your wife has picked up on that.
A lot of people on here are trashing your wife in the comments. Your mom does seem nice and she may not have done anything wrong, but this is a bit of a natural consequence for her. She judges your wife’s household and consequently your wife is uncomfortable with her around when the house isn’t clean and she isn’t presentable.
Cohesion isn’t going to make any of it better for their relationship. (If it can be called such)
But other than that you are absolutely right. She’s just placating the situation and he’s hoping the stalling that got them to her 35th year will mean she’ll have to except she’s never going to have children.
He might not even want a child and just want her to help get the house before kicking her to the curb.
Edit: spelling
What about the deposit? Paying towards a mortgage is just called rent
Mortgage is on him. its his mortgage. You should cover utilities.
9 months, i wouldnt even be living together. IF i were you, id be keeping the apartment.
It sounds like he's making a big statement on not going due to OP's “rudeness” in the hope that the hosts ask OP not to go instead. I'm getting really manipulative vibes, just like he showed with OP's ex
These methods work better at getting pregnant than as contraceptives.
Don't be gaslighted.
My best friend and I are both straight. We call each other babe or love. If we're watching a move we'll lean on each other or one of will lay down with our head on the others leg. Putting our arm around the other isn't uncommon either. We're both affectionate people by nature. There's nothing sexual about it. It's just us being comfortable with each other. Every friendship is different. I don't think what they were doing is proof they are more than friends. If you want to know sit down and talk to them.
It’s not clear she pays for the groceries. She says she has it “covered” whatever that means. Maybe she just does the shopping and organisation.
Good luck! ?
Yes. That is abusive.
You've been together for three years and he's pressuring you to do the unreasonable thing of throwing all your chips in – do you even know what he plans to do with your money once he has unimpeded access to it? Not only is he unreasonable, he's guilting you with “trust issues.” PLEASE DO NOT MARRY THIS GUY!!!
Yeah, I'm not going to lie, John's behaviour really comes off to me like that of a closet racist. I've found gay men especially to often have some nasty opinions about Asian men. If you've got any gay friends, ask them about how often they see “no blacks, no Asians” on dating apps.
I’m so happy to hear you communicated and got through that bump together! I hope your wife is doing okay (and you, too!)
It's passive aggressive AH behavior.
Look, an amusement park trip would be my idea of hell with my one kid, let alone three kids.
But I'm gonna use my grownup words and say I don't wanna go, or I'm going to suck it up and be a good sport since it's a short outing.
Instead this guy picked an argument, freaked out his family, and left his wife to wrangle three kids alone while texting her incessantly.
You really shouldn’t bring up the past especially since you and he addressed it 10 months ago. It seems to me that you want to end the relationship and are bringing this old issue up to make it his fault. Just say you’re having second thoughts about the relationship and keep it in the present. Hammering someone over the head with a historical issue is emotionally abusive.
This has been so validating. I actually thought I was crazy. I really did. I even got testing to see if I was a narcissist because I thought I was just always wrong and couldn't see it.