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46 thoughts on “M-A-D-O-N-N-A on-line sex cams for YOU!”
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No means no.
And it works both ways. If you don't want to do it, you don't have to do it. If she doesn't want to do something, then she doesn't have to do it neither. Intimacy is about 2 people connecting and both having fun, respecting each others boundries.
Its great she is in therapy! Give it time.
Consider some sessions for yourself, they will give you some insights and some skills to use to not only help support your partner but to apply in other areas of your life too!
Best to you?
Maybe she's not that into you but her sister thinks your cute and she's trying to be nice and see if you 2 have a connection.
Could be a test of trust and respect and you don't do anything with her sister.
Could be the making of a nude 3 some with 2 sisters…
Lots of options with most having good outcomes. Take her out and see how it goes. Read the body language and do not make any first moves. If there is any action let her initiate anything physical. This includes holding hands.
On a side note preface how old are you and the girl your dating? How old is her sister? Age can be a factor as well
The rules and boundaries should never be unspoken, that’s the overall issue here. He pressured her into something that she didn’t want, and is now blaming her for crossing a boundary he never communicated. He said he’s the one with experience, if that’s true (and I doubt it is) he should have known better than to just dive in without A LOT of communication.
Babe, you're fucking other people wrong! /s
Sounds like a self-serving opinion on his part. Did he think you would be okay with what he was doing ? Doubtful. Ofc it's cheating.
Lol, sis, this relationship is not going to work out unless you convert to being a JW.
It’s corny, and personally not the way I handle my business as a man. However, some people are different and feel the need to share this type of stuff. Red flag? No. Corny? Yes.
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It's a language exchange app. It doesn't have the same expectations as a dating app, so chill.
Just tell him you didn't want any identifiable info on your profile at first and you're sorry you've been a little dishonest, but now that you're becoming friends you want him to know your real name. Maybe ask to be friends on social media and see what happens.
We had been talking for a month and we're clear about our expectations. But guess you are right, he was just looking for a hookup and not a relationship. Else, he might be bit respectful. I wouldn't consider him right for ONS too.
Jahovas witnesses are known to only start serious relationships with other javohas, for a future with this man its highly likely that he will expect you to convert, from what i know they usually drop this bomb once the relationship is solid to coherse you into their faith. Not everyone is like that ofcourse.
If you see a serious future with this man, you need to be aware that he might require you to convert as a condition to keeping the relationship going, if you're not willing to do so then best to cut your losses as early as possible.
You literally move out of the country after going on a date?
Get as much pussy as you can. That should be the mindset even if you have higher-minded personal goals.
You're right. I hate her for this, but there is nothing i can do. And im sorry you experienced something sinilar to me. You put all this effort in to show your partner love and affection. Whike my ex told me she loved me it always sounded forced and awkward, but i overlooked it to her social awkwardness, so while she told me she loved me, i wosh now shed have never said it back because at least then her silence wouldve been the truth, compared to the lies of her voice.
I whole heartedly agree with you. The only one I really pity and feel bad for is the baby.
Link?
Can't he leave her and get a divorce? He doesn't need her cooperation for either of these things.
This isn't a preference that you didn't get. This is neurotypical deciding for a neurodivergent on what they should be able to handle. They have known you for quite some time if the proposal happened. That means that they know about the sensory disorder you have. They decided to ignore it because they wanted the proposal to go a certain way.
Their way is a preference, if they're typical. Yours is a fundamental need. What they did isn't any different than a person proposing with fireworks to someone who has a PTSD that's triggered by loud noise.
But it's always on us neurodivergent to bend to the typical world around us. We already have to do it on a daily basis just to have productive lives. There was no reason that you couldn't have been taken into consideration.
Autism, neurodivergence is hereditary. If you plan on having kids and you being the carrier, your partner needs to get educated about autistic people. They should do it for you too, but you're an adult who is making a choice to be with them. Kids don't get to choose their parents.
Before I continue, when you say “as planned,” how long has this been planned for?
Why would he be mad?
If he did not want to be interrupted he would have locked the door
Writing to her won’t help. You need to set and repeat boundaries: Mom, Your anxiety is not my task to manage. Please get therapy. If you contact my friends again I will ask them to block you. Your excessive reaching out is not a sign of caring, but of anxiety. You are making your problem into my problem, and this needs to stop before I end up blocking you myself for my own peace of mind. You need therapy Mom.
I don’t believe she was being abusive at all. This man is a lying sack of shit. If she was physical that’s not okay. I’d bet money she was trying to get away from him after he had enough of her “disrespect”.
I would suggest asking around your college/university and see if there are student jobs available. I'd also take advantage of your schools counseling center. Ask around and see if there are other girls you know from your school who are looking for a roommate.
What you need to hear is that no one is owed your time or love. It feels like the end of the world right now but your romantic partners don't define your life. This is an unhealthy situation for you to be in and I think you recognize that which is important. I would focus on going to college and enjoying the experience if you can. You're going to get through this, sending you a virtual hug!
Thank you! This is one of the best comments! I love it you’re not judging me but giving me the best advice ever, I appreciate it ?
Wow I did not think someone else with an autoimmune disease would see this and respond! I’m so glad because although the different diseases vary I’m sure you probably can relate to the stuff I talked about. You know the struggle and how tough it can be. Thank you for validating my feelings and assuring me I made the right decision. These comments seriously have lifted a weight off my chest. Also, I’ll 100% take your advice about not responding to him or being in contact. He keeps asking to call me so he can “finish all he needs to say”, but I think it’s best to just cut off all contact at this point. Thank you again! ?
That's exactly what I think, but he manipulates me in a way that makes me wonder if what I'm thinking is actually right and I'm the one in the wrong side?
That's a problem. You're making a big ritual of thanking her for it instead of giving her a kiss and a thanks
I’m not sure why you’re downvoted here.
The only thing I agree with any of these crazies about is that if you feel he cheated while you were seperated, then you technically did too. I don't think it's fair to call it infidelity, as he never asked for a break, he asked for a seperation.
But otherwise, keep your baby. Don't even worry about anyone or anything else. If you've always wanted this, then now is your change. Right now. And you may never have another.
Seriously, the amount of women who want to have children with a dude who is incapable of empathizing with them as their significant other is heartbreaking.
Some dusty ass man: you as a woman not being capable of my personal breeding stock is hurting my feelings
I would say adoption is an option for most people, but he sounds at very least emotionally manipulative.
Ummm…sounds scary. I wouldn't stay with someone like that.
He's basically always horny and only advances any physical movements because he's horny and not because he's affectionate.
Creepy vibes.
I hope you realize this person is not your friend.
At this point, based on her actions, I would definitely say he needs to put some space between them. I will give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he’s just trying to be nice to her and isn’t cheating, but he HAS broken a boundary you set. Furthermore, he knows this girl wants more than a friendship. Because of this, he needs to separate from the friendship (at least for now) and try to allow her some time to get over him and move on. Maybe one day, when she no longer has romantic feelings for him, they can be friends again.. But for now you need to tell him it’s time to take a break from this friendship, if not then you need to break up with him. This current dynamic is not fair to you.
My honest best guess would be sympathy or to feel anger towards you. Basically she's making you out the bad guy in her eyes so she can play victim. She's doing this to either get over you or to elicit sympathy from others. Both of these are highly likely, the real reason only she knows.
So you left her to her own devices the whole time? Did she know anyone else at the funeral?
Obviously some people did, and I don’t care if they do or don’t. It was cathartic for me to write it out.
What was the reasoning for you to comment in the first place out of curiosity?
since i am unsure if he likes me or not i have thought about telling him how i feel, and if he rejects me at least i will know for sure and it will be easier to move one but he didnt really tell me hes not into me since i didnt confess, i was just acting friendly to him
No, no. That's not autism behaviour. That's an arsehole move.
What you're doing right now is white knuckling…that quitting drinking without getting help and it's almost guaranteed that you won't stay sober. My bow ex quit for 13 months like that before relapsing. It also was no fun being around him because he was still the same depressed cranky always tired guy but now he no longer had his only coping skill. It was almost worse then when he was drinking. The substance is only a small part of the problem. Addicts self medicate. So if you don't get the underlying issues addressed and treated and get therapy to learn healthy coping skills you won't stay clean. I lived alcoholic hell and recovery hell with my now ex. I'm hoping you want to quit for yourself because if not you won't stay clean either. And also understand that you can never touch alcohol again. You can be clean for years and when you take a drink again you brain will go back to where it left off when you quit and you will relapse. Alcoholics cannot drink in moderation. Get help if you're really motivated to quit.
My dude. She's trying to use you for your body.
Yep, and if there weren't a reason for monitoring visits, why would he let the mother do this, instead of getting a court order for his parental rights?
At the least he does not want to parent his daughter and is fine with a few hours here and there. Probably “supports” the kids by contributing what he feels like when he feels like it, too.
I'd be curious why so like you. Has she ever shown interest in you? Do you tend to drop off the face of the earth when you get a new bf? Looks more envious than anything
You might have more success posting this to r/BDSMAdvice.
I’d say you need to stop playing/step out of your dynamic until you get this aftercare situation sorted. It sounds like this is really doing you some harm, and that’s antithetical to what kink is about. I’d encourage you to also think about your own limits—if a certain act or type of play is leaving you feeling this badly, this consistently, then it’s okay to say you don’t want to engage. A good Dom will respect that (though I would also argue that a good Dom would help you explore why it makes you feel the way you do to try and help you form more positive associations, if it was a limit that you wanted to work through).
As to actual solutions, I’m going to make the good faith assumption that your partner is not a shitbag, and is simply young, oblivious, and (it seems) has different aftercare needs—some people do need space and to switch gears completely to decompress. I’d suggest coming up with a protocol—he always does x, y, and z things immediately following a scene or session, then goes and does his thing.
To help this along, maybe part of your pre-scene prep could be gathering your aftercare items so they’re ready to go. Maybe you cue up an episode of your favorite comfort show on your laptop and throw your bathrobe in the dryer for ten minutes. Have a cold drink on the night stand and a couple pieces of really good chocolate or another favorite sweet ready to go. Depending on what kind of play you’re doing, keeping a set of baby wipes handy, some body lotion, arnica gel and/or antibiotic ointment nearby is a good idea too. If you have a favorite stuffed animal or pillow, make sure it’s close by, etc.
After you play, maybe your aftercare protocol goes something like this: he cleans you up and you both share your favorite part of the session, or he gives you whatever type of praise you enjoy…if your dynamic is bedroom-only, this might be the time you transition back to your everyday headspace, and having him praise you and reassure you could help with that. This also would be the time for any applications of lotion or first aid (my Dom does this after our impact play sessions) and cuddles. Then, your partner could go get you your now-toasty robe, wrap you up with your stuffie or pillow, give you your chocolate and drink, press play on the episode you’ve got ready to go, and leave you all cozy in the bedroom while he goes and does his thing to decompress and transition back to regular life. Maybe you agree that he needs to check in on you periodically afterwards (timer or alarm on his phone or watch to help him remember?) and make a point to drop another compliment or “good girl,” whatever does it for you personally. I would like to stress that this is part of the deal when you Dom or top in a BDSM context—you’re responsible for your sub’s well-being, and that includes helping them regulate the physiological and neurological processes that inevitably occur when you engage in this type of play.
Wow I wrote a novel, sorry!
Big takeaway: hit the pause button until you figure out how you can both meet each other’s needs re: aftercare. If after all that, he still doesn’t make an effort to adjust, then it might be time to think about your long-term compatibility, especially if kink is integral to your intimate life. As a fellow subby lady, I’m here for ya if you ever want/need to chat ?
Good luck!
You may have a lot of love for her but you need to decide if that love is the sort of love that results from relationships. In your case, it doesn't seem like it is. She might love you, but it doesn't seem like you love her in the same way. I'm not sure if that makes any sense. You would be doing her a disservice if you decide to go monogamous with her and you didn't truly love her in the way that she ought to be loved. You would also be doing her a disservice if you continued to be romantically involved with her but not in a monogamous way. Perhaps I'm wrong, but it seems clear that she wants a monogamous arrangement and any agreement to anything else would be made only because she wouldn't want to lose you. So I think you have to decide if you really love her, if you could envision yourself loving her and only her for the rest of your life and finding happiness in that.
You sure she's just hanging with friends and sleeping on the side of the road? That sounds dodgy as all get out. She doesn't listen to you, she lashes out, she's run away before (what?) and threatens it again (while having a child at home), withholds intimacy. I can understand why you'd be feeling distant. Is there a reason she can't get her own water/cereal? And what in the world got you so mad at sugar containers? It just sounds like a nonfunctional mess.