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You can want sex and think you're ready for sex and even be in the mood for sex, but a woman's body doesn't always play along. I've had this issue since I noticed with my first bf in my early 20s. It took a while to figure out what was going on and I even saw my doctor but they weren't any actual help in my case (old male doc who ignored most of what I said). Eventually I learned how to speak up for myself and my needs and not be embarrassed of my own body and feel like a failure for not being able to do something that seems so simple. For me it was either that no foreplay happened (obvious), or even if there was foreplay to my completion, I still somehow wasn't fully relaxed. I'm 37 now and I still have to put my hand out to hold my bf back at the beginning of any penetration so he doesn't accidentally hurt me. And after around 30 seconds I can let go and I'm all good. It's just that first minute where I need patience and he's very understanding. I guess I would question how that first minute or two of penetration goes for you. Are you trying to go as deep and fast as possible right away? Take some time with it. Tease her with it and start with slow shallow movements until you can feel her become less tense. Watch her body language and her face for any signs of pain and back off as soon as you do. Maybe think of buying her a toy and letting her explore her own body and feelings around penetration on her own so she has a way of finding what's comfortable without the pressure of also dealing with your needs. Of course this is all based on the idea that she will be up for trying this again at some point in the future. I would definitely leave that to her and not put any additional pressure on her right now. Also, I'm only sharing from my perspective so it may not apply to everyone. I also don't share her trauma so my perspective may not matter if this is the main issue. Good luck.