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Kira aka Droolia Roberts, 21 y.o.
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Start by apologising for all the things you have done (not the “sorry, but…” ones that don't mean anything though). Add your contacts and that she can give it all the time and you have to wait till she reaches out to you. Your expectations are probably very different from here.
Also… don't involve your parents, that might feel like betrayal for her.
You’re probably right
What the hell? She's being unreasonable. I wouldn't keep any valuables in a room in which I know there is a good chance for sperm to be flying every which way. 😀
It was an accident anyway.
How long ago did this accident take place? The reasonable time frame to be extremely angry about this is minutes.
Yeah that would definitely be too strict for me at that age. Sounds like you should move out if you can make it financially.
This
I wouldn't say anything. Let them ponder on it and you and your husband can laugh
These were classic durex ones we had issues with. They're given out for free at uni and through our public health system. Never had a problem with them with smaller partners, I can't stress enough how abnormal he was though – the act of getting them on was painful. Sex itself was a bit of a mission.
Respect his boundaries. The relationship is over. Leave him alone.
It doesn’t matter if they did, it’s over. Stop reaching out to her and try to move on.
Best way to handle that is to take 50 mg of Viagra, and achieve that teenager (it's so naked you could crack walnuts with it) type of wood and then run her through for like an hour….she won't complain again….
Perfect
Cheating on your pregnant wife is insane. You can pass STI’s onto your baby. Some people don’t deserve to be parents or partners.
I don’t want her to change her body for me, I want her to get healthier and there is nothing wrong with that, you don’t want good things for your partner?
I said something like that about casual.
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That’s extremely awkward and embarrassing, also that’s allowed on TikTok so idk…?
Jfc, the bar is SO low, why would she stay with him?!
Thank you! ❤️
Have you tried hanging some super churchy stuff on your door? Big old cross, Jesus loves you doormat, that kind of thing? (No crucifix or statuary, nothing Catholic. You wanna shop the clearance section at Hobby Lobby or Mardel.) Experience suggests that the only thing that's gonna make them leave you alone is if you're already “saved.”
I did not ask for advice on how to interpret him, I know him well enough that these are not mixed signals, but on what I can throw in my decision making process whether or not to stay by him while he is working on his issues…
Looking at your responses, this man is still living with his girlfriend, but villianizing her while claiming she’s his ex that he lives with to co-parent, and I bet he says he’s only there for the kids sake. Did you know this is a very typical routine in a cheaters playbook? How else are they going to manipulate a woman into their bed who may have issues with being a side piece?
Are you sure you want to play with fire and have your heart ripped apart? Do you think you need this in your life? It’s not good for depression. Let’s say you get him, he dumps her, and therefore you helped home wreck. Your prize is what? A guy who’s going to make you out to be a bad girlfriend he just co exists with til he can move out, next time he’s on the market for a new side piece once the novelty of you wears off?
He's a drug addict and will always be a drug addict. If he's just recently sober he still has a long ways to go. Is he getting professional help? Meetings, weekly therapy etc? If not I'd dump him right now because recovery is a lot more than just not using a substance. Also it is not your job to help him get or stay sober. You can't even if you wanted to. He hasn't been treating your right for a long time. Start having some self respect. This guy needs to focus 100% on becoming sober if he's serious about it. But as someone who was married to an alcoholic for several years and also went through recovery process with him…..I wouldn't ever do that again and for sure wouldn't waste any time on just a bf. You have no kids you have nothing to tie you to him long term other than the fact you can't let him ago despite him not treating you like a human being. I also highly recommend you get therapy for yourself to work on you and boundaries and self esteem. Because you're going to continue to attract unhealthy partners and eb a doormat as long as you don't fix yourself
While that is true, I think the girlfriend is setting a boundary for their relationship. What is missing from this being a boundary is what she says she will do if that boundary is violated. “I would like for you to honor my boundary in our relationship of neither one of us having lunch with and/or hanging out with coworkers and friends of the opposite sex without others present (ie: alone). If you violate this boundary, I will/my option is to do :___.”
You are not throwing away 6 years. She threw away 6 years. Yes time to move on.
This was wrong on too many levels
Only married two years and you want to leave, sex is robotic, you don't feel seen, and he's texting other women?
It's ok to say, “Well, that was so mistake!” and fix that mistake.
Now! Before you get saddled with his kid and are stuck with him in your life forever.
Someone make this comment stay at the top ..!!
omg i can’t believe some of the stuff i read on here ..
self esteem is sooo important along with so many other things
And you, my darling are having an emotional affair. I would suggest you break off the relationship with your boyfriend. It’s really unfair to him. Most of us get into a relationship hoping to be the soulmate. Nobody deserves that that’s a decent human being. So just break up with her boyfriend and then you can just be with your soulmate. And he can go on and find somebody who really loves him that can be his soulmate.
marriage or not, how have you both not talked about long term plans yet?
You need a plan. The thing that will make you feel better is having a plan to act on. To do that you need to find a lawyer or counselor.
You said you liked photography? Offer to do headshots for people for a couple of hundred bucks. I know someone who does this for LinkedIn profiles and makes a killing. She is in NY and now has a booming business. Or photograph something else. You can find dozens of online communities on how to get started and free classes on photo editing.
Once you start taking some kind of action you will feel less lost. Make yourself do something for 30 minutes each day. No excuses.
Well, for starters, stop treating her like a friend and start treating her like you would someone who you'd want to court.
I get what you're saying about the first dates. But to put it bluntly, if nothing is different from when you two were hanging out as just friends, that's a sign youre doing something wrong. But you already seem to more of less know that.
You know her very well at least you should. So how do you think she would be woo'd? Do that.
Good riddance
did a line of coke off his dick
This is amazing, I'm dying here.
My boyfriend could propose to me with a frickin fruit loop and I'd be overjoyed. Seems she's showing you she highly values material goods. How does that align with you?
You have a good friend. He is right. There is a reason older people date people who are half their age. The best man you've ever met is dating someone who he can manipulate.
Honestly? Still debatable. I'm letting him believe I've forgotten about it and then check his phone to see if it's the same. He deactivated his account as soon as I told him to (I told him in a rage, I know I shouldn't have done that) but with no question he did it. So idk, I'll have to see where this goes and what I find
I didn’t even notice the age gap. I’m a 36 year old dude for what it’s worth. Maybe my age and gender alone is enough for intagram to put me into an algorithmic category. I stopped pretending to understand any of this shit years ago honestly.
She is also still pretty young. Unfortunately she doesn't have perspective to appreciate everything else he brings to the table more. She seems the type to only learn in hindsight.
I paid for my wedding. It was small and easy to manage financially 🙂
You are not crazy you are calling her on her shit. The fact that it gets so overblown is because she is hiding something and KNOWS it’s wrong… so now she turns it on you and it’s your fault. She will only take you seriously if you take it seriously. Start looking into divorcing/ separating and only think about reconciliation if both of you take couples therapy. If she doesn’t take it seriously then you know what your relationship means and where you are at this point. Stay strong don’t give into her manipulations.
Yeah just break up, sooner the better
Toxic masculinity is a baaaaad thing to be taught growing up. It literally takes me being racked with grief to start crying, it aint fun being unable to let out emotions when needed because you got taught that “men dont cry”.
What are you not saying? How much is you best friend time, is you larping as an adult couple that is kid free? How much of the child mental load is just on your wife? Also how much money are you spending on a friend? If your wife not your bf because you pushed 90% of parenthood on her as well as household chores and she resents you.
I don’t think this will cause as much drama as you fear. Roger knows he was a shit dad who missed a lot of your milestones. Deep down, he knows he doesn’t deserve to walk you down the aisle.
Tell Roger what you told us. That you see him more as a friend and not a father figure. Remind him that Roger was there for the naked stuff and you feel like it’s not right for him to have to share on the good stuff. He’ll understand. He’ll be upset, but mostly at himself.
Once your dad is on board, your grandma will follow. She’s most likely concerned about her son’s feelings and not yours. Once you assure her that Roger is at peace, she’ll let it go. If not, it doesn’t matter. It’s YOUR day. Not hers. She can either fall in line or not come.
All will be fine.
I don't think you can come back from this.
But that's your choice of course.
She doesn't really sound all that nice. Sure, right now she's PRETENDING to be nice…but what happens when she gets tired of pretending?
And what if you've got kids and own a house together when that happens? Perhaps she will meet someone else and decide that rather than being lucky to have her, your luck has run out and “you never deserved me anyway..”
I think it's basically going to die anyway now,although you might be able to force things to keep going for awhile…which could be trouble, if you keep it going long enough to have kids or buy a house together.
It's a shame because your hobby is actually a good hobby, means you stay home with her, helps you to save money, teaches you stuff…it's a shame she did not see how good she had things.
Why do you think you have a right to be in a bathroom.with her if she expressively says she doesn't want you in there?!
We just have really good chemistry and I know I'll never find someone else that would share the same level of chemistry
He didn't meet this women at a work conference. He met another woman at a bar, when he was drunk and mad at his gf. He then stayed out until 5:30 am. If you think that's just meeting “an acquaintance” than you are naive.
Yeah I’m glad too
He gone now no more 40 your old ?
Largely a western concept.
She’s not an “abuser.” Unless this has happened before, it’s a one time occurrence that was triggered by you being disrespectful by snooping on her phone as she was passed out drunk, and trying to start an argument while she was clearly intoxicated and incoherent, and also probably triggering some PTSD she has.
I don't see a reason as to why she would lie about something like that. Come to think of it, i find it strange as to no one in their friend group just kicked out this guy. This whole thing is just… odd
Ew lol. How transactional are your relationships?
I drive 99% of the time because I like my car and my boyfriend’s a shitty driver. I also don’t let him pay for gas cause it’s my car and who cares. At the end of the day, he buys food or something and shit averages out.
Ew lol. How transactional are your relationships?
I drive 99% of the time because I like my car and my boyfriend’s a shitty driver. I also don’t let him pay for gas cause it’s my car and who cares. At the end of the day, he buys food or something and shit averages out.
Ew lol. How transactional are your relationships?
I drive 99% of the time because I like my car and my boyfriend’s a shitty driver. I also don’t let him pay for gas cause it’s my car and who cares. At the end of the day, he buys food or something and shit averages out.
I know I do, i threathened him to not come to my house anymore since I'll get the popo's involved and he got pissed and went on a social media binge tirade with his posts. As long as he doesnt touch me Im good but how bitter do you have to be to dedicate months of your life talking about one person. Jesus christ.
How much is therapy? Money is pretty tight rn, any other alternatives that would bear similar results?
It's really sad. Tbh. To just give up and accept it.
And what also gets me is when people say they don't believe in getting help. Well I think your attitude and behavior states otherwise.
Thank you so much for this, honestly this might be the most helpful comment in terms of moving forward with my current partner. I used to journal a lot, I imagine getting back to that will be very helpful. I have lots to reflect on for sure and I’m grateful for the interactions.