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Who got her pregnant then?
I don't think you're transphobic. I think you made an error in how and the way you maybe told this person. I think the jump from people making mistakes that affect people who are trans gets lumped in with transphobia. I don't think your decision came from a desire to hurt your brother because he is trans but since the lie concerns the fact he is trans people are missing the mark. Had this been some other secret it wouldn't have mattered he was trans. It's about the secret not what the secret was.
I think if this was a post designed to spark hate for trans people it would have had a different focus. But it's really about secrets and lies and there is some nuance there. Fwiw I know many posts here are fake but I respond as if they are real anyway.
She’s probably already moved on tbh. Co sided yourself single and take it from there.
Naw, you gave in to an impulse but don't obsess over this. I wouldn't recommend even apologizing. Distance a bit, she'll probably understand even without you saying anything.
Understood.
Bad advice.
It's a very bad idea to buy a house with someone you're not married to.
Ur friend has a drinking problem. U shouldnt need to drink at a kids party at 11am. Tell him hes free not to come so he can drink.
Good point, thanks
I'm only adding one lil thing. How you ask. When you tell him you were gonna call but noticed the number changed, say how weird it is, then give a reasonable but wrong answer like oh my sister was on my phone, lil witch probably did it. He'll either admit it was him, honestly not know, or he'll double down on the sister story and agree with you, and he'll be absolutely sure your sister did it. The latter is your answer if he really did.
If we all paid for confidential therapy everytime family or in-laws pissed us off we would never get anything else done. That was her safe space to vent in that moment and your dads illness is likely weighing on her too. I doubt she is heartless. I am sorry about your dad but just let this go.
This guy seems like an absolute jerk and you deserve better. None of this sounds healthy or normal. I've been married to my husband almost 28 years and we have had plenty of disagreements and in all that time he and I have never spoken to each other the way your boyfriend talks to you. It's toxic.
I lived a very similar situation.
I stayed. For a lot of reasons. Mostly low confidence, and kids.
We are currently in a decent spot. But it has been 12 years of really heavy work. And I’m in a spot now that I know I will never walk through that again.
Leave.