Please, he will never make you happy. You want a relationship with someone that you can share your emotions with, who understand you, that loves to touch you. A relationship that isn't so factual. Love is not everything.
As someone with autism that has problems with emotions others, doesn't like to be touched, need much time for myself and is pretty much asexual, i know my restrictions. I know i can't be in a relationship with people that has “normal” expections, i would make them unhappy. And i just knew that what i have is autism since two years, before i just thought i'm strange.
Your bf knows his behaviour will make you unhappy longterm, so why even ask you to marry? Why doesn't he go to therapy? Just this self-diagnosis?
You will harm yourself again and again. And he won't change. Because he will never be fully the partner that you wish to have. So ask yourself why you stayed with him so long? Because you felt back to turn his back because of autism? But it is part of his character!
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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Hugs Hugs Hugs My heart hurts for you. I have been in your shoes. My first baby was born still at 38 weeks and it was the most devastating, life-altering experience. Your heart is broken. Your soul hurts. Now, you have to deal with a cruel man – yes he is cruel to say those things to you. Too many people believe pregnancy is easy and always has a joyous result. It doesn't. Conceiving can be naked and pregnancy can be brutal.
Personally, I think you need to talk to a therapist and find a support group for women who have experienced pregnancy and infant loss. There are groups on-line that can be so helpful. It helps to know you are not alone and there are women who understand. They may be able to help you talk to your husband.
Until your heart and soul are ready to try again (it took me 4 years to try again), you need to take care of yourself. If he can't understand your pain and support you, he isn't ready to be a father.
An adult conversation … where you shut down the way your wife with a speech impediment is most comfortable communicating when she is upset? After allowing your mother to change the details of your wife's nursery she was creating for her child? And claim you are a great listener? That's some seriously narcissistic BS.
Exactly, I don’t understand why grown ups would think not knowing every single friend of someone you aren’t “best friends” (as in, knowing each other forever and spending almost all of your time together so it’s inevitable) with is a bad thing. The friend seems to be otherwise a good person and friend, but just doesn’t feel OP is as close of a friend as OP does. That doesn’t make the friend fake or whatever.
I didn’t want to type a novel. Here are some other anecdotes to help explain why I’m feeling disappointed: 1. Three weeks ago when our with other coworkers, a friend mentioned me and Luke are cute together. Gabby responded with a scoff under her breath. The friend noticed and called her out on it, she just ignored us for the rest of the night. 2. When Luke first asked me if I wanted to be exclusive, Gabby responded with a laugh. 3. Luke and I recently took a trip to Hawaii. Not once did Gabby ask about how it went. In fact, she never asks about how things are with us even though I actively ask about her and her partner, and comment on how great he is for her, how happy I am for her, etc.
Actions speak louder than words. Your partner is just telling you whatever he thinks he needs to say to make you stay. If he really wanted kids then he'd be trying to get his act together, save up money and expressing desire about the subject in general.
You're wasting your remaining fertile years with an alcoholic man who doesn't want kids.
Speak to a lawyer asap
Yes I am, unfortunately. Time to wise up and face the music
You are doing the right thing for your self and your daughter. Your wife needs help though.
Please, he will never make you happy. You want a relationship with someone that you can share your emotions with, who understand you, that loves to touch you. A relationship that isn't so factual. Love is not everything.
As someone with autism that has problems with emotions others, doesn't like to be touched, need much time for myself and is pretty much asexual, i know my restrictions. I know i can't be in a relationship with people that has “normal” expections, i would make them unhappy. And i just knew that what i have is autism since two years, before i just thought i'm strange.
Your bf knows his behaviour will make you unhappy longterm, so why even ask you to marry? Why doesn't he go to therapy? Just this self-diagnosis?
You will harm yourself again and again. And he won't change. Because he will never be fully the partner that you wish to have. So ask yourself why you stayed with him so long? Because you felt back to turn his back because of autism? But it is part of his character!
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Hugs Hugs Hugs My heart hurts for you. I have been in your shoes. My first baby was born still at 38 weeks and it was the most devastating, life-altering experience. Your heart is broken. Your soul hurts. Now, you have to deal with a cruel man – yes he is cruel to say those things to you. Too many people believe pregnancy is easy and always has a joyous result. It doesn't. Conceiving can be naked and pregnancy can be brutal.
Personally, I think you need to talk to a therapist and find a support group for women who have experienced pregnancy and infant loss. There are groups on-line that can be so helpful. It helps to know you are not alone and there are women who understand. They may be able to help you talk to your husband.
Until your heart and soul are ready to try again (it took me 4 years to try again), you need to take care of yourself. If he can't understand your pain and support you, he isn't ready to be a father.
An adult conversation … where you shut down the way your wife with a speech impediment is most comfortable communicating when she is upset? After allowing your mother to change the details of your wife's nursery she was creating for her child? And claim you are a great listener? That's some seriously narcissistic BS.
No because in both cases youre scolding a disabled person and telling them they have no business getting married.
Exactly, I don’t understand why grown ups would think not knowing every single friend of someone you aren’t “best friends” (as in, knowing each other forever and spending almost all of your time together so it’s inevitable) with is a bad thing. The friend seems to be otherwise a good person and friend, but just doesn’t feel OP is as close of a friend as OP does. That doesn’t make the friend fake or whatever.
Ok and? What kind of response are you looking for here? We can only make guesses as to why he was staring but won’t really know.
Ohhh you’re a troll lol
I didn’t want to type a novel. Here are some other anecdotes to help explain why I’m feeling disappointed: 1. Three weeks ago when our with other coworkers, a friend mentioned me and Luke are cute together. Gabby responded with a scoff under her breath. The friend noticed and called her out on it, she just ignored us for the rest of the night. 2. When Luke first asked me if I wanted to be exclusive, Gabby responded with a laugh. 3. Luke and I recently took a trip to Hawaii. Not once did Gabby ask about how it went. In fact, she never asks about how things are with us even though I actively ask about her and her partner, and comment on how great he is for her, how happy I am for her, etc.
i think you got it right, thank you for explaining, the totality is right, hes very generous and i shouldnt get so upset over one gift.
How would it be possible to love someone in a month?! How do u know u love him? When did he become ur bf?
Actions speak louder than words. Your partner is just telling you whatever he thinks he needs to say to make you stay. If he really wanted kids then he'd be trying to get his act together, save up money and expressing desire about the subject in general.
You're wasting your remaining fertile years with an alcoholic man who doesn't want kids.