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I don’t see why you don’t stay at the hotel. You can go out for a dinner by yourself at your favorite place in down town, or meet up with friends. Then when her party is over you can A. Go back to hotel and have hotel fun with your wife B. Go to the after party that spouse all go to that you mentioned
But this sounds like a trust issue more than anything else. You need to have open conversation with your wife. You seemed concerned about her coworker. Just talk the issue thru. Open conversation only leads to stronger marriages as long as you both are willing to listen. Try to keep it to “I feel” statements