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Yeah.. well it’s becoming more apparent now. Thanks for your feedback ❤️
Exactly the fwb shows she really doesn't give a shit about him
You met him a week ago and he’s mad that you’re tired and won’t help him satisfy his sexual urges.
He should be trying-to-impress mode this early.
Are you impressed?
Came here to say this. I didn't bring anyone home to meet my dad because he was a volatile, abusive drunk. So when anyone doesn't want me to meet their family I believe them the first time.
I agree that you shouldn’t ask trap questions, but I don’t agree that we need to respond with only hot truths to try to correct the behavior of people who do. The reality is people get insecure sometimes, we’re all human. We all have weak moments. Sometimes you look to someone for a little reassurance and you don’t phrase it in the best way. The kind thing to do is to offer the reassurance.
Vagina troll?
If either of you think this method is a way of preventing pregnancy, you are fooling yourselves. If this was foolproof, all the other contraceptives would not have been invented. Tell him if it will make you feel better, but it‘s Russian roulette every month in any case.
not very verbal about his feelings but his actions are undeniable
This makes me think you're on the right track with packing him meals – if he's an actions-speak-louder-than-words type of person, he'd rather you do something for him rather than telling him words.
Totally.
i feel like this isn’t something you should be pondering about lmao. do you actually wanna associate yourself with a bigot and then potentially bring children into it? like come on.
He… gets like that a lot. Whenever we fight he calls me all sorts of stuff. I try to forget about it
Same for men. My ex used to do this. He would always be overly excited about a book or new album – and it was always recommended by, or a favorite of some hot girl. And he would always pretend like he started having that interest organically. When I would point out the obvious connection, he would pretend as if he didn’t find her attractive or that she wasn’t “his type.” That blatant gaslighting was honestly one of the worst things anyone has ever done to me. It ruined my self esteem
50/50 only makes sense if both partners make equal amounts or both parties are willing to on-line at the lower incomes level. Bills should be split proportionally.
I'm not trying to invalidate his feelings. I understand why he feels this way given the beliefs he has about my action. But those beliefs are wrong. I don't value him or our relationship any less because I tried to hook up with some else so quickly. I am autistic, maybe that's why I didn't know the unspoken 24h rule though I'm still not so sure I agree with it. I was active in r/deadbedrooms because the last year we didn't have a lot of sex after he pushed me to do things I was uncomfortable with, which generated a lot of anxiety about sleeping with him in me. I didn't feel like I could say no even when it hurt.
Soon this turned physical
It was already physically when he started to Sexually Assault you.
It got to the point where I kept saying no and it ended up happening anyway. He even did it when I was sleeping and when I woke up and shouted at him he started crying so I comforted him. This happened multiple times.
I'm sorry, but what he did was Sexually coercion. It's a form of Rape. You could make a police report about it, if you want too but it's a long and tedious process that leaves no room for healing until after the court hearing is done. I'm so sorry you had to expirence it.
Turns out he’s still speaking to my ex actively even after he found out what he did to me.
You can't control who he doesn't or does talk to. If he's friends, then distance yourself from your brother as much as you can, but you told him relative information about why he is a bad person, unfortunately its up to your brother to decide if he believes you or not. There's really nothing you can do about it.
Then she can respect your lifestyle. Your wife needs to grow some balls and stand up for you. She is an adult and she let her mama take away the game
I think you’re right to be upset. He is objectifying Asian women to the point his friends ridicule him for it. They know he isn’t just happening to date Asian women, he’s fetishized them.
You talk about how kind and sentimental he was and how you adored him? That immediately read to me as your ex being really affectionate with their new puppy. That’s not the dynamic you want in your relationship
What you're describing is a relationship where you've got to know each other and it's not a good fit, so it's time to end it. Your emotional needs are NOT being met because you are with someone that you don't have an emotional connection to. It's ok to call it. Most relationships aren't lasting, recognizing that earlier would probably reduce the divorce rate significantly. People seem so reluctant to end “wrong” relationships and just stay together and get married then wonder why. It's fine, she's not for you. Someone else might be.
Unless you're fully prepared to leave this job you can't say a thing. You're management and so by definition uttering a word about this is de facto sexual harassment whether she welcomes it or not. She's also dating someone else. So if you can't keep these feelings to yourself start applying for other positions so you can get away from the temptation. If you've worked your way up to supervisor it would a shame to destroy your career and make yourself unattractive as a hire anywhere else just to clear your conscience on this woman.
He’s a pig. Cut your losses and move on. He doesn’t respect your boundaries at all.
Stop talking to him. Not worth it, he’s clearly an ass.
Not OP, but my understanding is that OP is attracted to penises and wants her partner to have a penis. Since her partner is a trans man who has not had bottom surgery, he still has female genitals. Therefore, the sex can be described as “f4f” because both people have vaginas (f for female).
From what I can gather, the genital preference seems to be the biggest issue, which is why that’s where OP kind of drew the line. Nothing but respect for her. Trans people are 100% valid, but so are genital preferences.
It’s crazy that you did what you did. It’s crazy that you told you him about it, apparently not knowing how something like that would be received. Just crazy all around! How did you think he was going to react?
Thank you so much for your response. There is an age gap between them. I think he’s like 38 and she is 25 or 26. I don’t think she’s all that into it. I think she likes some of the attention, but she doesn’t come on to my husband at least not in front of me. I actually feel a little bad for her. It feels so gross how her husband talks to and about her. She’s a newlywed they have only been together a few years. Maybe she hasn’t laid down boundaries with her husband. IDK
Totally agree with therapy. My heart is broken and I feel so betrayed and angry. This isn’t a mess we can’t walk through alone. I told him that we need to go, but we haven’t gotten into that further yet.
We won’t be spending any more weekends away with them. I need to declare that very clearly though. I am afraid they will still be around occasionally hanging around his sister and her husband. They on-line a few hours away so it isn’t like we will run into them around where we online.
The Quran is clear and it’s not debatable. The question is would me going to the wedding endorse his Union? I should have asked this in the Islamic sub
You should tell him
Of course it's possible, but the internal feeling about oneself in any situation counts for a lot.
And seeing as how you're mostly making this about yourself, I'd say it's highly likely she doesn't feel really seen by you yet.
I think taking the time off to travel, mourn, grieve, and reflect on what you want to do in life is not only perfectly ok but quite productive for you in the long run. You've got a lot of adult decisions to make coming your way, and you need to be in a good state of mind before you make them.
You also don't need to be giving any explanations on how you are paying for your activities to anyone.
That said, you have shown incredible maturity in how you've handled marriage, house ownership, and career choices that came your way so far. Wanting to get engaged but have a multi year engagement and not wanting to buy a house in a place you don't know you will want to stay or know you won't be able to support in the long run are all sensible financial decisions.
I'd recommend investing this money for the time being until you are no longer mourning, have a clearer future outlook, and are more knowledgeable of money administration.
I'd also recommend stopping discussing this topic with your grandparents. Just tell them the inheritance is being taken well care of and you won't go into details with them.
Another story of marrying before you’re ready because of religion. Sorry, but it’s over. Next time spend a lot of time before marriage. Make sure you are sexually compatible and get along well by living together first.
In this post I've kept the details short but he explained a bit more about his triggers, but still not really enough for me to understand them fully. He was for a long time and takes antidepressants but not ATM. I'm not sure if there is something he needs to work on? It seems that he has accepted his situation. That's why I'm not sure if it's okay to ask him to work on his triggers. I don't want to disturb his “peace” Is this topic something that he should work on with a therapist maybe?
Seconding this. He's a creeper and she needs to realise this.
You need to dump him.
That’s a huge jump to conclusions, bud.