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Agreed. Guess my main point is the bf has a double life. She doesn’t deserve to be lied to and cheated on with anyone regardless of sexual preference.
Give her some space to process her emotions. Then talk to her about it. Listen to how she really feels without judgment. Seeing things like that is extremely damaging it just doesn't go away. It burns and she probably now feels humiliated, inadequate and second rate. She might choose to walk and that is ultimately her choice.
Maybe it's time to stop with the secret codes and just sit down with her and pop the question verbally – without any puzzles, riddles or codes involved.
I was talking about your case specifically.
Like, Are you not getting married after 5 half a decade together because you still dont know them well enough? In that case, can we really ever know someone fully? Arent we always changing as a person? and if thats not it, then why stay together?
Its not a big deal. I just dont understand the thought process, you know? maybe you guys dont want to get married and are happy just being gf&bf, thats possible too. You are right, we are all different and you surely have your reasons. Thats why i added the “imo” in the first comment.
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You are too young to be worrying about that, it may have been an excuse for a breakup because he couldnt find anything wrong with you as well so he resorted to that or it may be that someone who doesn't have divorced parents think that things cant be talked over. In any case just move on, he isnt going to figure anything out and he made clear with his actions while you were crying that he didnt want to be with you
block them and or delete their info and social media.
then you can go wherever you want to. ask yourself want you need in order to process everything that went down in a healthy way.
counseling can always help give you some clarity and help you maybe deal with things.
give yourself grace and time. Don't be any in any rush to follow some made up timeline of how things should go after a break up.
Normally I never support forcing someone to get rid of a pet, but that poor dog is being abused and neglected. That amount of time in a create is what is creating the anxiety. He needs to contact a rescue group and let that poor dog go to a home that won't neglect him.
As for your relationship with this guy, he's a jerk. He 100% ignored your expressed concerns and got a dog anyway. That is terrible in a relationship. Is this really a guy you want to be with?
So my advice? Convince him to find a home for this poor dog then after that is done dump his ass and find someone who doesn't disregard you so badly.
go to a clinic if you can. explain your situation, they tend to work with people from many economic standings and are often more than willing to help you work something out!
don't be afraid or embarrassed, you did nothing wrong and are not alone
He is politely telling you he wants to end the phone call. 1 hours is a long phone call, I couldn't imagine talking to anyone for longer than that
quit stringing her along ya silly goose
Is he doing it on purpose? Perhaps throwing a lot of toilet paper first, then poop, then more toilet paper, to make sure that the toilet indeed gets clogged and thus forcing his wife to deal with it? Even if it's not on purpose this is 100% a control issue and possibly also a fetish but it's being done without consent, so, totally wrong.
Maybe you can offer a compromise, like once a week you meet him at the park and let them spend time together?
It doesn’t need to be a huge break up. Send him a text message. Say that you know he lied to you about who he was meeting up with and that it’s over.
Would you let your boyfriend be friends with his ex?
My mom is the same way, it makes her happy to give gifts for special occasions even though I always tell her I don’t need anything. Just smile and say thank you. Regift it to someone who might like it or donate it after a bit of time.
You know blackmail is a crime right? Who's going t9 randomly blackmail you and your gf because of an old porn video somewhere? How valuable could that be?
I mean she manipulated him, grooming is much easier to do in intimate or familial relationships because of the connections and need for dependability.
Better question is where do you get off blaming a victim of a cheater for wanting to believe them when they’re asking for help?
You need to start having discussions about his her parents will interact with your kids if you're thinking about having them eventually. Obviously your children couldn't visit them at their house, it's unfair on older kids and dangerous to you get ones. I would also advise inviting them to stay with you to see what they're like as guests in your house because that could also be an issue.
You are single. You have no obligation to your ex. Her insecurities are hers. Unless this other woman played some part in the breakup, she has no good reason to feel insecure about the current situation.
Women….
The latest one was a phone conversation where we talked . I got quiet and almost hung up. The next day she texted me about hiking and she said I must be in good shape…actually here is her exact comment . “Wow…you have been climbing that muntain for years. No wonder your wives die. They are not used to so much strain.”
Yeah exactly. There’s not shortage of porn. I guess it’s good he does t seemingly engage with people but it’s just weird. Why even. Like he’s keeping track or something. Or maybe secret account? Was the account one you are aware of at least? Like an older one?
Communication is always good. If it’s entirely “innocent”, which it could be, at least you can get in the same page in terms of expectations. I’m sure he’d be hurt if it was you doing that. Sounds like he was uncomfortable with the meet me you had which you deleted.
I’m glad I’m older and I passed all that shit up. I can’t imagine how much that complicates relationships. I wonder if ppl even meet each other without technology anymore. When I was single dating websites were for losers. Now everyone uses them. A few years ago i was “seeing” this woman and she was telling me all the shit that’s available now for dating. I felt so fucking dated. Hahaha. I met her the non technology way – in a grocery store. She told me it was the first time she had met someone without an app or thru friends. Hahahaha. It’s like that’s how it used to be for everyone. My real life is always swiping right or left!
I can’t rule it out however she hasn’t given me any indication otherwise she’s failing mentally. We talked frequently and other than a stray memory having a different person than she thought (was it my mom or her daughter that took her to that store one time) she seems fine. She’s always been highly emotional as long as I’ve known her, overly so. And that’s only increased with age.