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It's mind blowing how many men don't take any responsibility for their own reproductive protection and then are shocked when they get “baby trapped” after having unprotected sex.
Do nothing! Ignore him, don’t text him, don’t think about him.
Move. On.
She is an alcoholic. It’s not how much or how often you drink, it’s how what you drink affects you. This is not a moral or intellectual failing, it’s a medical issue. I think of it like an allergy, but instead of hives or breathing problems the sufferer loses the ability to moderate their consumption, which leads to all the issues that come with being too drunk to function. Unless and until she accepts that she is an alcoholic ( or allergic to alcohol), treatment will only be a temporary solution. Do with that information as you will
Ok… let me say this first because of how it comes off… You don’t get to give your wife permission to attend a work party.
That said…
She wants to be part of the group.. she is new and does want to miss any part of the night. This is good for her. For the guy… you will have to trust her… You can ask that she texts you when in the room because you are nervous the guy will try something inappropriate. You can even say, but this is about your concerns… not her inability to handle herself.
You can tell her you are disappointed to not be invited, and ask her why… If other spouses come… but in the end you need to let her handle her career her way.