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Legally it can twist in to “she have a % of your house”. Ask her to pay for shopping and other bills. But if u still want to go for rent, get her to sign a contract
this is a great description of the ONLY thing that ever worked to release me from a similar kind of circular loathing and hate. With the step father who repeatedly raped me as a kid and teen….at some point, and I mean DECADES of therapy…..at some point I had a realization of the poverty of character that existed inside him his entire life, of the absolute devastating loneliness and desperation living inside him, to twist him to become what he became. Similarly, John's husband may well have had a massively void existence from the past which he is helpless against and manifests to YOU and other as this vicious, memory stealing/polluting bullshit “joke” behavior. We all know he's just absent the love he needed, but he's still responsible for his choices as an adult. Let's say you can actually find out that he never had a relationship (including his current marriage) which gave him anything of value, even that won't help you, you'll just wish it had left scars on him visibly…….it would just feed your loathing and anger. If, however, you could talk to someone like a therapist about this, a trauma specialist (because this is the circular thinking of trauma and ptsd) you might be lead to discover your own understanding of how your pain is a clear indication of what he lives with on a minute to minute basis, his whole life. At that point, when it dawned for me, I no longer felt anything but horror at how we had BOTH been treated, and sadness has wained since then, but anger/rage disappeared in that instant of understanding. He's dead and gone, but I never forgave him. I understood him, which is even worse in a funny way, because you know more about your attacker than they know about themselves when you understand them.
I want you to have freedom from this legacy. Find a good trauma therapist and go for specific reasons around this. Give your happiness back to yourself.
xo from a granny who giggles instead of rages