37 thoughts on “Gisellereyess live webcams for YOU!”
Honestly I think I'd leave.
Educated as he is, most people are not able to completely override prejudices that they have had instilled in them from a young age. And I say that knowing that his prejudice is likely to be rooted in actual family events, and not just an inherited preference.
If its causing him this much turmoil after only 3 months then it stands to get a lot worse before it gets any better. If it gets better.
Probably at the start he was ok with it because you cant have mattered to him when you just met, but now that feelings are developing he's realising that the feelings are not quite enough to cancel out the lifelong anti Russian sentiment.
Or, hear me out. It might just be an excuse.
I have no idea what went on in his family and I wouldn't suppose to say exactly how much his familial history should influence him, but it may be that he doesn't want to go forward for some other reason and is kind of using this as a cast iron reason why, because let's face it, neither of you can alter the facts of your birth.
The reason I mention this is that his knee jerk panic reaction now, at this juncture isn't exactly in keeping with his supposedly highly educated status, and previous exposure to things Russian. Perhaps I've read too much fiction recently but I kinda have that 'something doesn't add up here' feeling and I'm not sure why. So I'm supposing at this point.
Either way, if you were my kid, I'd say leave this. It's only been 3 months. He's not all-in for whatever reason, and believe me you need someone who is all-in regardless to get through a lifelong relationship.
yeah that’s definitely crossing a boundary, i suggest maybe talking to the friend about it? & if they can’t respect you or your partner than maybe cut them off
My fiancd did this to me a couple of years ago. We weren't having sex and he kept convincing himself that i was playing with myself because i didn't want to hang out with him and was going to bed early. Truthfully, i was just overwhelmed with him and the relationship, but i wasn't going as far as pleasuring myself. It got to the point where i pulled down my pants to show there wasn't wetness and told him if he didn't stop, we were done. He finally got the point and chilled tf out. We are a lot better now, after a lot of growth. I hope you can put some sense into or think about whether this relationship is worth the torture.
Yeah i did express to him several times that i didn't like communating by text too much for this very reason… But he on the other hand hates phone calls. He did offer that i send him voice notes instead but i don't especially like that option for several reasons… I'm not used to using voice notes at all, and i'm also rarely ever on my own so i don't feel like it's very practical for me on a daily basis, + i'm still left with having to interprete the tone of his texts on my side of the conversation
Thank you. That’s a good idea. I already dread knowing that’ll it’ll break her heart. I want her to visit me but my mom has been pretty vocal about not allowing that. And my sister has extreme OCD and fear about leaving our parents side. She thinks if she isn’t with them at all times they’ll die.
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OP barely did anything wrong. She’s been supportive of her sister, going NC/LC with her parents because of how they treated her sister. All she pointed out was that she wouldn’t have mentioned her period pains if she knew the gf was trans as she didn’t want to make her feel awkward. Yes, she was upset that her sister didn’t tell her but the parents overheard them. She didn’t out the gf on purpose. If they didn’t want her to know, they shouldn’t have brought it up over a comment about periods pain, a topic that shouldn’t make anyone feel awkward.
Then it’s a moot point, it’s the exact same if you fell for someone who was already in a relationship; don’t ask them out and ruin a relationship
Yeah I think we’re both inexperienced, i don’t know about his past I just know he’s for sure not a virgin but doesn’t seem very experienced to me. Im certainly not experienced but I think I know more than him. Im happy to listen to his needs and don’t mind criticism. I hope he is too.
I’m in my mid 40s and I don’t mention that to be dismissive at all: because by the time I was your girlfriend’s age- I had learned from a very early age that a lot of guys absolutely cannot deal with a simple “No.”
I hadn’t quite gotten to the point where “I’ve got a boyfriend” was something I had given up on: but, the thing is, no. Many of them don’t care.
The way she rejects people is based on her experiences, and most of the women you know have creepy stories going back to childhood, let alone guys that don’t make you feel like “No, thanks” will suffice and I didn’t stop saying I had a partner because it often doesn’t work: I stopped saying it because it shouldn’t matter what comes after “No, thanks.” People should back off but, they just don’t.
Don’t take this personally, it’s in no way about you. Instead, while bearing in mind that “I have a partner” is sort of a 50/50 thing in terms of whether the guy cares about that or not: have her tell you some of the horror stories about rejecting advances. I guarantee she’s got them and that’s why she’s come up with the method that makes her most comfortable in getting them to leave her alone. Odds are, she’s had to do it for a very, very long time: most of us have.
Eh it could go either way at this point. It's in her court. Don't be pushy. Don't be a jerk. Don't ruin this for yourself. When you see her, be nice, talk about normal things. Don't bring it up. Don't hang around waiting for her to bring it up. Just be cool, man
Did I read her post wrong? He said he is more attracted to her personality than her looks. He never said she was not attractive, just that he loves her personality more.
Looks fade; a personality cannot be faked. OP needs to view this in a more matured light.
First off, unless he's actually making plans, divorce isn't on the table yet. Get into couples counseling and keep working hot on the exposure therapy. Exposure therapy is actually one of the most effective and best proven psychotherapies that exist. Your chances of beating this are very good.
Stressing nude about your marriage now might be a little premature. It's definitely something to bring up with your therapist. I struggle with a “host” of anxiety problems as well. Before you let yourself go through the gamut of thoughts and emotions (“predicting the future” in psychology speak), try to figure out if it's even warranted yet. And good luck!
I would ask her why she isn’t investing it or putting it into a retirement account. When my husband gets a bonus from work we do home maintenance and invest the rest. That’s the most prudent way to manage the bonus. Giving so much of it away is poor fiscal responsibility.
I’d talk to her. Say you can’t accept it because it is t in her best interest to give it away. Ask her to invest in her retirement account or get with a financial planner to start an investment portfolio. Say you appreciate the gesture and a celebratory date would be nice, but since she earned this bonus through her own hot work, she should reinvest it in her bright future
This reply answers your own question. The lack of safety and security means you were not getting what you needed from the relationship. That's a perfectly good reason to break up.
No i dont want childcare from them, its more are they making enough effort with regards to seeing her/bonding with him? Should i be doing more? Should i be expected to always have to take her to my dads, or only be able to see my mum on set days? Etc etc
Well that was an instantaneous reality check huh never really considered that especially seeing as I've been very transparent with my therapist and she always told me I'm just young and it's normal
I was thinking of one of my friends. Sometimes he's been there for me when I really needed it, and other times he's unexplainably a big flake. But I've come to understand that's just the way he is as a person. He's still my friend, even though I won't count on him in every situation.
A lot of it is personality differences. I'm guessing you're an introvert, and your friend isn't. If you find a fellow introvert, they may be able to better relate to the kind of friendship you are looking for.
You feel like a third wheel because you ARE the third wheel and not the priority since your bf is adamant that he will never leave moms nest. Because of this, he will likely loose out on ever being able to establish a normal relationship with any woman as long as mom is living which will likely be for a really long time. So you have some important decisions to make in regards to your long term future plans. Do you see a future with a man in your own home you build a family with, or the next 20 or more years under his moms control, influence and like a third wheel in a home you can’t really create and make as your own comfy space?
Honestly I think I'd leave.
Educated as he is, most people are not able to completely override prejudices that they have had instilled in them from a young age. And I say that knowing that his prejudice is likely to be rooted in actual family events, and not just an inherited preference.
If its causing him this much turmoil after only 3 months then it stands to get a lot worse before it gets any better. If it gets better.
Probably at the start he was ok with it because you cant have mattered to him when you just met, but now that feelings are developing he's realising that the feelings are not quite enough to cancel out the lifelong anti Russian sentiment.
Or, hear me out. It might just be an excuse.
I have no idea what went on in his family and I wouldn't suppose to say exactly how much his familial history should influence him, but it may be that he doesn't want to go forward for some other reason and is kind of using this as a cast iron reason why, because let's face it, neither of you can alter the facts of your birth.
The reason I mention this is that his knee jerk panic reaction now, at this juncture isn't exactly in keeping with his supposedly highly educated status, and previous exposure to things Russian. Perhaps I've read too much fiction recently but I kinda have that 'something doesn't add up here' feeling and I'm not sure why. So I'm supposing at this point.
Either way, if you were my kid, I'd say leave this. It's only been 3 months. He's not all-in for whatever reason, and believe me you need someone who is all-in regardless to get through a lifelong relationship.
So from your post history it looks like you're a complete doormat mate.
I'd suggest you grow a spine and stand up for yourself, unless you have a humiliation fetish, then have at it I guess.
yeah that’s definitely crossing a boundary, i suggest maybe talking to the friend about it? & if they can’t respect you or your partner than maybe cut them off
My fiancd did this to me a couple of years ago. We weren't having sex and he kept convincing himself that i was playing with myself because i didn't want to hang out with him and was going to bed early. Truthfully, i was just overwhelmed with him and the relationship, but i wasn't going as far as pleasuring myself. It got to the point where i pulled down my pants to show there wasn't wetness and told him if he didn't stop, we were done. He finally got the point and chilled tf out. We are a lot better now, after a lot of growth. I hope you can put some sense into or think about whether this relationship is worth the torture.
My guy she wrapped her legs around this “male family friend” ??
lost me at “i was able to talk her into ending it with her gf and start seeing me” ???
Yeah i did express to him several times that i didn't like communating by text too much for this very reason… But he on the other hand hates phone calls. He did offer that i send him voice notes instead but i don't especially like that option for several reasons… I'm not used to using voice notes at all, and i'm also rarely ever on my own so i don't feel like it's very practical for me on a daily basis, + i'm still left with having to interprete the tone of his texts on my side of the conversation
Thank you. That’s a good idea. I already dread knowing that’ll it’ll break her heart. I want her to visit me but my mom has been pretty vocal about not allowing that. And my sister has extreme OCD and fear about leaving our parents side. She thinks if she isn’t with them at all times they’ll die.
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I'm curious… what is white (or dark) rum mixed with flavored seltzer water called? I drink it all the time, but I'm sure it has a name.
If your gf is aware of your actions towards your crush- I kind of understand her point
OP barely did anything wrong. She’s been supportive of her sister, going NC/LC with her parents because of how they treated her sister. All she pointed out was that she wouldn’t have mentioned her period pains if she knew the gf was trans as she didn’t want to make her feel awkward. Yes, she was upset that her sister didn’t tell her but the parents overheard them. She didn’t out the gf on purpose. If they didn’t want her to know, they shouldn’t have brought it up over a comment about periods pain, a topic that shouldn’t make anyone feel awkward.
Then it’s a moot point, it’s the exact same if you fell for someone who was already in a relationship; don’t ask them out and ruin a relationship
Yeah I think we’re both inexperienced, i don’t know about his past I just know he’s for sure not a virgin but doesn’t seem very experienced to me. Im certainly not experienced but I think I know more than him. Im happy to listen to his needs and don’t mind criticism. I hope he is too.
I’m in my mid 40s and I don’t mention that to be dismissive at all: because by the time I was your girlfriend’s age- I had learned from a very early age that a lot of guys absolutely cannot deal with a simple “No.”
I hadn’t quite gotten to the point where “I’ve got a boyfriend” was something I had given up on: but, the thing is, no. Many of them don’t care.
The way she rejects people is based on her experiences, and most of the women you know have creepy stories going back to childhood, let alone guys that don’t make you feel like “No, thanks” will suffice and I didn’t stop saying I had a partner because it often doesn’t work: I stopped saying it because it shouldn’t matter what comes after “No, thanks.” People should back off but, they just don’t.
Don’t take this personally, it’s in no way about you. Instead, while bearing in mind that “I have a partner” is sort of a 50/50 thing in terms of whether the guy cares about that or not: have her tell you some of the horror stories about rejecting advances. I guarantee she’s got them and that’s why she’s come up with the method that makes her most comfortable in getting them to leave her alone. Odds are, she’s had to do it for a very, very long time: most of us have.
Thank you.
Eh it could go either way at this point. It's in her court. Don't be pushy. Don't be a jerk. Don't ruin this for yourself. When you see her, be nice, talk about normal things. Don't bring it up. Don't hang around waiting for her to bring it up. Just be cool, man
What a strange comment to make.
Thank you for the kind words. That's a good point about purity culture and not learning what healthy romantic and sexual relationships should be like.
And what weight is he pulling?
Did I read her post wrong? He said he is more attracted to her personality than her looks. He never said she was not attractive, just that he loves her personality more.
Looks fade; a personality cannot be faked. OP needs to view this in a more matured light.
First off, unless he's actually making plans, divorce isn't on the table yet. Get into couples counseling and keep working hot on the exposure therapy. Exposure therapy is actually one of the most effective and best proven psychotherapies that exist. Your chances of beating this are very good.
Stressing nude about your marriage now might be a little premature. It's definitely something to bring up with your therapist. I struggle with a “host” of anxiety problems as well. Before you let yourself go through the gamut of thoughts and emotions (“predicting the future” in psychology speak), try to figure out if it's even warranted yet. And good luck!
He’s had to apologise to your family- that was probably the worst but- the other person is a stranger.
I would ask her why she isn’t investing it or putting it into a retirement account. When my husband gets a bonus from work we do home maintenance and invest the rest. That’s the most prudent way to manage the bonus. Giving so much of it away is poor fiscal responsibility.
I’d talk to her. Say you can’t accept it because it is t in her best interest to give it away. Ask her to invest in her retirement account or get with a financial planner to start an investment portfolio. Say you appreciate the gesture and a celebratory date would be nice, but since she earned this bonus through her own hot work, she should reinvest it in her bright future
Agree! I’m a wife and would understand but she may need some extra reassurance that she’s enough for you, OP
This reply answers your own question. The lack of safety and security means you were not getting what you needed from the relationship. That's a perfectly good reason to break up.
Saaaaaame they are so much children. being an adult around teens has made this concept more revolting, and it already wasn’t a pleasant one.
Don’t get me wrong I love my students, but they’re just little babes in the world.
No i dont want childcare from them, its more are they making enough effort with regards to seeing her/bonding with him? Should i be doing more? Should i be expected to always have to take her to my dads, or only be able to see my mum on set days? Etc etc
Well that was an instantaneous reality check huh never really considered that especially seeing as I've been very transparent with my therapist and she always told me I'm just young and it's normal
Glad to hear it!
I was thinking of one of my friends. Sometimes he's been there for me when I really needed it, and other times he's unexplainably a big flake. But I've come to understand that's just the way he is as a person. He's still my friend, even though I won't count on him in every situation.
A lot of it is personality differences. I'm guessing you're an introvert, and your friend isn't. If you find a fellow introvert, they may be able to better relate to the kind of friendship you are looking for.
I think as long as you're clear about the fact that you're not sure about long term and that it's like a FWB thing, you're good.
If I could award this answer I would! ??️
I literally had no idea. Like you would have better opportunity to convince me the sky is green than try to get me to believe she would do this.
You feel like a third wheel because you ARE the third wheel and not the priority since your bf is adamant that he will never leave moms nest. Because of this, he will likely loose out on ever being able to establish a normal relationship with any woman as long as mom is living which will likely be for a really long time. So you have some important decisions to make in regards to your long term future plans. Do you see a future with a man in your own home you build a family with, or the next 20 or more years under his moms control, influence and like a third wheel in a home you can’t really create and make as your own comfy space?
She is overreaching one on one sounds like a date!!
He has a say too. You tell him and see if he is ok being a father. He has every right to know