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Sounds like your relationship has been going down hill for some time now. Enjoy it while you can.
“I think some people do feel like it's part of their identity.”
I feel like those people are either stupid or liars.
Your boyfriend will “let” him cover?? You don’t get a say in that??
I don’t kind of get where your bf is coming from. You don’t really feel like you can relax when you have overnight guests. However, it’s just once a month, then bf should suck it. He should suck it up it were once a week. Any more than that and I’d be uncomfortable too.
It's only once a month. Bf is unreasonable.
30’s and 60’s is the correct age range
First off I am not a teenager, I am 20. Second off I realise in this situation I am in the wrong, I am going to apologise to my BF. Third off, I do contribute to rent, he doesn’t want me to contribute to household bills I have offered.
Most people don't go through and read all the comments so you will just end up with 5,000 people calling you a cheater for saying it's not an option but not why in the main post.
No this was posted earlier.
Also make the point about your pain and the relief it provides, would you want a loved one to be in constant pain? Pain drives people insane. Not treating your pain can be worse than the illness. And you are using it in a supervised, controlled manner.
Build a bridge and get over it.
As someone who encourages her husband to look at beautiful women I have to say he is wrong here. It only works if everyone is comfortable with it. You are not and he knows that so he needs to come up with a better reason as to why he is doing this. I’m sorry to hear you’re dealing with this, I just want to say I think you have a right to feel the way you do and are not a nagging wife.
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If you're not comfortable doing something, don't do it. I've seen so many instances where the boyfriend kept nagging the girlfriend into this scenario, she eventually gave in and felt filthy and horrible for a long time afterward. It doesn't matter how much you love him, boundaries are there for a reason. If he keeps saying “I love you, we should do it”, it sounds like he's trying to manipulate you into doing what you don't want
Don’t do it. Trust me.
You married a cheater. What did you expect?
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Hahaha oh man you just pulled that one right out of her butt didn’t you. Classic Reddit, well they must be a narcissist because every parent who had a kid with issues does.
After being in a toxic relationship where my partner was cheating on me with some girl I considered a close friend of ours/sending me mixed signals all the time, I would encourage you to refrain from trying to make sense of your partner's actions, its a waste of time and effort because you can spiral and think and think and think but you'll never understand those actions because your not that type of person. I have realized, and this may not be the case in your situation, if you think of every action as a lie to cover something up, it makes much more sense.
Nothing to steal when she’s giving it away.
Hence the term misogynist
Mhmm. Kay. You'd rather not be told that she's got anything at all wrong because she's your perfect princess and you're not being used because you're choosing to give her literally anything she could ever want.
Mhmm. Kay. You'd rather not be told that she's got anything at all wrong because she's your perfect princess and you're not being used because you're choosing to give her literally anything she could ever want.
You say she’s a friend In need, my first thought on this is she could be going through something right now personally and is having a hot time and isn’t trying to hurt you. Without knowing why she’s doing this I would have to say yes that would be extremely petty of you to sabotage her.
what's his monthly salary/expenses?
Do you know any younger children under 5? If you drink their urine (doesn’t matter the relation, only the age) it might give you some courage to have the conversation. Good luck.
Thank you for your advice
Couldn’t have said it better.
This guy is in multiple bands on top of everything else and prioritise spending quality time with her outside of the bedroom. However he’s made it crystal clear how much of an inconvenience she is.
Dude , just let her find someone who will treat her properly.
If you are not comfortable confronting her write a letter or a quick note to inform her of what you know and if you want to avoid the drama block her on everything till you are ready
Ask if she has a preference, if not, fix what you want. If she doesn’t like it, then tomorrow she decides.
Get as much evidence as you can, take screenshots of everything. Put it on a USB. Use it in court. Fuck that dick and his witch.
Love is not a solid reason to tolerate emotional abuse. You are a victim of abuse.
Distance yourself. Ghost and block her. She deserves not 1 more minute of your life.
The world is full of wonderful faithful people. Get out there and find one.
At this point, I firmly believe the content you consume = the kind of person you are or want to be.
Look at me, I’m an asshole on the internet in my free time. I think that fits me to a T. My other stuff is like yours, fashion and hobbies. I’m more honest on-line than I am in real life. Aren’t you? You’re not talking to your neighbour about this shit you came to us.
Your phone/internet history is like a personal diary. Fuck, if one of us dies a loved one and I have standing orders in place to destroy all very hot drives, phones and written journals. It’s that important to us.
He’s spending all his free time looking at scantily clad women/girls. What’s that say about him? What’s he got hidden in his dark secrets? It’s probably not the terrible mid 2000s fanfiction somebody else is trying to hide.
Sorry I wrote this on my phone and half asleep. What happened is two days ago he told me the truth about sexting with a 16yr old at 21yrs old. I had asked him about it a couple times months ago which was when he lied each time.
That's abusive. You're using her.
its a break up
or if she was a good person who got fed up
My money is on this option.
I would have never had a kid with a man so immature and cruel as to find people's anger/frustration laughable. He is an immature AH.
Who wouldn't be upset about a partner stealing $300?
Ask for the money back and ask why she thought that was even ok.
If someone is repeatedly asking you to do something you’re uncomfy w, that is coercive :/
the only thing that should matter is you don’t feel like it, it is his responsibility to respect that, it is not yours to make sure he feels pleasure.
Idk if breaking up w this person is on the table for you, but at the very least, I’ll say I’m sorry this is something you have to deal w. That sucks and is not ur fault. ❤️
why are you even with him
Me too. I’m hoping he’s cool about it and we can just have a nice heart to heart. I couldn’t care less about the actual relationship. I just hope he takes the opportunity to tell me the truth. If he can do that, then it’s all good. Don’t really give a shit about the past relationship. But lying about things creates distrust, distance and suspicion. I don’t want to on-line like that.
They never worked together. Which I should have picked up on because they dont even work remotely in the same fields. But I had no reason to think twice about it.
Groomer alert.
How much cleaner is it now? ?
THIS GUY SUCKS. Your past isn’t the problem. He is immature and misogynistic. He does not love you. Break it off. He’s playing you and he won’t date you but it’s okay because he sucks.
Nope. I'd divorce him.