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Talk, chat, call. Maybe it was a bad day. Maybe he has a history. Idk, but if it was a first time thing between you and him, it’s worth to talk and make things right.
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Call the police.
It sounds like your girlfriend and you want different things at different times. She has a timeline: move in together after a year, proposal in the third year, married by year 4, and probably kids a few more years after. This way the kids can grow up and move out before she's 50.
Moving in after only a year of dating would be too soon for me, and it seems like you feel the same. My biggest worry in your situation is things not working out so you need to move out, but since your parents thought you were gone they no longer have room for you. So you would need to find your own place.
I also was taught that you should on-line together for at least 3 years before getting married. This is not something everyone needs to do, but it was advice my father gave me, saying 3 years is enough time to make sure you can live together without honeymoon brain.
Anyways, at this point in time, I suggest thinking about what you want in life from yourself. What do you need? What are you willing to give up? She has laid out her wants and needs, so you should do the same. Do you want to be married at some point? Do you want kids? What do you want to do before that? If you two are not compatible, it's best to find out now after only a year.
A lock or a doorstop is a good idea, but You should get a camera as a safeguard. Make sure no one knows you have it and make certain that it is hidden somehow so that the creep won't notice it.
Grey rock! Stop giving your mom so much information about your life. YOUR life. Not hers.
The engagement is between you and your affianced. Not her. It does not involve her one little bit.
The eventual wedding is ALSO not about her. Your children, should you have them, are also not about her.
You need to flat out tell her that her involvement is minimal at best. You also need to tell her that failure to back off will result in a very decreased presence in your life. Good luck!!!
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It's easier said than done. I'm scared of him 🙁 The fear is nude to get past.
It sounds like you shouldn’t have kids or date someone who has kids! There is nothing wrong with that, but now you know.
Why do you keep spamming this?
The thing with jokes about serious topics is that they A) often contain some truth and B) because they often do contain truth, are also often understood to contain truth because it's very possible.
So I'd say stop with those weird jokes about serious topics or even insecurities. Doesn't matter if you stay with you current partner or it's towards any future partners, you can't read minds or see the future how they'll be reacted to.
That being said, your partner saying she'll always have her guards up around you is concerning. Either you've made way more weird jokes and comments and destroyed her trust, or she has serious trust issues. The therapists are a good start, also calm open and serious conversations with your girlfriend. Not when you are arguing, plan them. Sit down at a table, think about separately beforehand what you wanna mention, be careful about speaking in sentences like “i feel” instead of “you should”, be calm, don't call names, don't joke, give each other space and time to talk. Then you can maybe find out if the relationship is salvageable.
Your sister is mentally ill (something from the B cluster, I would say borderline). And spoiled. She has done unacceptable things and hasn't suffered consequences. Well, she will suffer one now.
we were bantering back and forth and at some point i said i was gonna go get with someone else as a joke and he responded with well okay i have my lineup ( part of me thought he brought that up bc i expressed concern about it earlier and he knew it would be a good jab)