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Um this behavior by him is entirely inexcusable and wrong. Name calling and degrading you is not ok and “punishment” is not okay either. He either accepts your apology and you both move on and focus on your relationship or he breaks up with you if he can’t deal with your behavior but this is completely fucked up and I’m so sad that you are asking how YOU can fix the situation when it seems like you’ve fully apologized and taken accountability for your actions. If he can’t move past this, he needs to end the relationship which I realize sounds sad for you, but the reality is, you are going to make mistakes in this relationship again if you are together long term, do you really want to be with someone that holds things over you and PUNISHES YOU every time? Because his behavior is scary and controlling and will escalate. This is not a good person and I hope you stand up for yourself.
That is in no way normal. You should dump him, dont have children with him please they will be traumatized!!!
This exact situation happened to me when I was younger. It took me a while to process. It is absolutely rape
Only answer op should look at
Y'all are not dating, she is free to see/talk to whoever she wants. I'm not sure why you want to be involved with someone that essentially told you she is not interested in pursuing a relationship.
Yes, your wife is a cheater, at the very least emotionally. It doesn’t matter if she’s never actually slept with any of these other women; what she’s done is just as bad.
She’s also extremely selfish if she insists she gets a pass for sharing naked photos of herself and sending inappropriate messages to them. Just because she never got to explore that side of herself doesn’t make it any less hurtful to you.
Frankly, you should speak to a lawyer about filing divorce papers if she continues her behavior. There may not be any other way to make her see how despicable she is acting.
Move on and ghost him back. You deserve better.
It’s unfortunate that some people want dumpster fires.
up ?
So your 40 year old boyfriend who is half your age is manipulative and a lier. I feel for his kids they didnt ask to be here but yet there here. And they have a dad who didnt want them. He lied about who they were and says he was baby trapped. Who's to say hes telling the truth about that. You have every right to be upset he sounds immature for his age and yes this is a red flag.
You burst the tire, you pay for it. How is this even a question?
M should lose F’s number. Go no contact and never look back.
Jesus. Why didn't you drop all this info in the post to begin with?
Why the hell are you even with this person? Dating them sounds like being in hell. I'm not trying to be rude at all when I say this: Time to grow a pair and dump her. Don't you have any self-respect? You deserve better than this.
very – he's selfish and opinionated
and he wants a “pure” woman to be with, he's a child
You’re absolutely being manipulated. I know you’re scared, but you need to just leave. Or kick him out. Idk how the lease is set up where you are, but just do it. Again, it’s scary I know, but you’re not happy, and honestly, it sounds like you’re mentally unstable. He’s using you. If he’s homeless, that’s on him.
If it’s your name on the lease, tell him he has 2 weeks to find a new living situation. Or if you’re fearful that he’ll hurt you, go to the cops and ask them what the laws are. If the law is on your side and you can legally kick him out, have a cop with you when you do it.
You need to start prioritizing yourself.
You've come to no firm conclusions about sex, love, romance, or even whether your GF is lesbian or bi, DESPITE the fact that each of you finds the other a safe place to explore and experiment, and have been at it for 12 years. It is a strange form of compatibility that has now allowed you both to experiment with everything and commit to nothing.
You speak only of your fears, not of your hopes and dreams. This helps explain why after 12 years of experiments, this is where you've ended up.
If and when you discover that you've focused your hopes and dreams on your childhood friend, you'll be ready for the final experiment. As to whether such a discovery awaits you, and after how long, only time will tell.
They take a hell of a lot more abuse than just dropping to break. This was intentional.
I get the creeping sense that I will never be ready for adult relationships.
Good God. YES. GET TF OUT OF THIS.
Earth will be fine it’s just all of life that is what gets killed. Earth has survived bigger things than nukes. Earth will be fine it’s just all of life will most likely go extinct until all of the chemicals go away
I am sorry You’re so naive or you were raised to think otherwise but your wife clearly has not desired to have children, marrying someone because you think they may change their mind about important life decisions is a gamble, so now you’re going to face divorcing your wife because for some reason you thought even if she’s never spontaneous and she plans everything step by step, the only thing she would be spontaneous about was children.
If it were that likely to be a set up, the police and the prosecutors would not have wasted their time to take it to trial. Unless he was acquitted because some last minute evidence proved that someone else did it and he just was at the wrong time in the wrong place, or the accuser was the daughter of the chief of police, or that everyone involved is a known racist and he happens to be the race they hate, if it made it to trial he certainly did it.
Missed opportunity, should have turned it into a threesome…
oh i totally agree with you about that. i think there’s a lot of very valid criticize of OP, but i didn’t think the point i was responding to was
I know we are all strangers here, but I genuinely hope you overcome this and won't let it break you as a person. You did nothing wrong except love someone unworthy of it. This is a clean slate for you. You'll meet someone worthy some day! You seem like a genuinely good heart ?
Yes you are being judgemental but that's OK. Youre allowed to be.
Give him space to let this process.
Do some real work on yourself. Why did alarm bells not go off when this started? Who texted whom first and how many chances did you bypass to short circuit your flirting? Why, other than you momentary guilt, would stop this from happening the next time some random guy gives you attention? Why is lying so easy to do, especially to someone whom you claim to care about?
Any person who put some dumb fucking “cultural” tradition above the desires of their partner, knowing FULL WELL it makes them uncomfortable is not someone you want to be tied to.