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It's HER FAULT …. screw that … emotionally manipulating you
Baby trap you? You know what you are doing and how babies are made. You are trapping yourself. And repaying evil for evil makes you what? The good guy? Nope. That karma will swing right back around to you. And seems like you don't care about her anyway, she's just a whole for you to insert your immature little dick into. Grow up. Act like the almost adult you are. Tell her you're leaving and why, take your shit and go. No need to be a POS on top of everything else.
Gotchu, just be smart next time. I wouldn’t say let this situation stop you from sending stuff in the future, especially if it’s something you enjoy doing. I’d say just make sure it’s for someone who you know got the right intentions, and remember, as modern day poet Cardi B once said, no face no case. I live by that, and been doin this same things at the same age. You’re prolly gonna be fine, stay aware of your situation, but don’t lose sleep over it. And just in case nobody else shared this, if anyone ever ever sextorts you, don’t pay the money. It’ll only let him (or her if you swing like that) know you’re willing to pay, and they won’t stop getting money/whatever tf from you. They teach us that at boot camp in the usmc cuz I guess marines are stupid and think with their d too much and send pics to some guy in India. Just play the game smart. Even now, you’re not in a bad spot. He is your bf after all. Just hope the worst case scenario doesn’t happen.
Do you own the house (or have a mortgage on it) or is it a rent/lease.
If own, then get a lawyer to draw something up so him giving it to you as part of the separation in exchange for the half of the savings. Provided that when you sell it you will get more than what he is taking.
If lease, tell him that before he can take anything from the joint account, his half of the rest of the lease must come out of the half that is his, and must be either paid to the landlord now, or put into an account you control.
I suggest you replace your husband with a financial advisor :)… I know it's not that easy tho. Plan your escape.
Well, she has made it clear that she does not want kids. Do you have made it clear that you do want kids. So there is obviously a mismatch here. If you stay together one or the other is going to irritate the opposite. If my wife and I were in those shoes, I guarantee one of us would’ve backed out right away. It’s almost like you’re asking for relationship problems in the future.
So did she or didn’t she have the money to pay for your education? If she didn’t have it and y’all couldn’t earn it, what was she supposed to do?
You are in an unhealthy relationship. If you’re young and new to dating you might think this is normal. It’s not. A girlfriend who cares about you and who is a good normal human does not say “you’re annoying. i hate you. You don’t love me.” Your anxiety level is not healthy or normal. The way she winds you up is not normal. This is a lot of drama. She isn’t kind. You deserve to know what normal dating feels like ?
A lot of it is mental, stress, nerves, insecurities, etc etc all of that can make it really really fuckin hot for her to get there.
If you wanna give it the ol' college try. I'd usually say experiment but you're outta time, make sure your nails are trimmed, tease her a lot, work on foreplay and fuckin pray buddy.
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She’s stonewalling. Not an atypical response when we get into arguments.
A light, playful slap in the arm could MAYBE be ok as a joke/comedic effect as long as you’d be ok with it and it was clear all round that it was not painful. Slapping you in the face? Oh no, absolutely not, doesn’t matter if it hurts or not, a slap in the face always has the intent to hurt and humiliate. Walk away from this – she will do it again.
Yeahhhh that’s no longer a friend hun, at least if I was in your situation he wouldn’t be considered a friend anymore
No, this is over. Just let it go.
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For one, take your kids off your damn profile. There are far too many creeps live. It definitely comes off manipulative too.
Second your post history is suspect to a degree. It seems like you married a teenager, knocked her up and is surprised she still wants to online like the young person she is. And you definitely live! to control how she dresses and behaves. No wonder she’s pulling away.
I consider this rape.
Being a furry is a hobby. Even if he's not in it for the sex, so it's not necessarily a fetish, it's still just a hobby.
The way he “came out” about it implies to me it might be a fetish thing?
Either way, that's not something I'd think needs a coming out. If you're into scrapbooking or age-play in the bedroom, either way I don't need you to tell me about it unless you want or expect me to join.
Being gay isn't a choice. Being a furry (making or owning furry art, participating in furry culture) is. If he's attracted to anthro animals and this is what he was telling you…that's a fetish, then, and not something generally to be shared with people without first getting their consent.
I'd give him space. Maybe let him know you're giving him space via text, but give him space. If you laughing genuinely triggered his PTSD from coming out, he needs some time to chill and gather himself.
(Still) having sex with reach other?
Maybe he's telling you he doesn't care, but hoping you'll come around and change your mind? Who knows.
If the friendship doesn't feel right or authentic to you then you can end it. That's up to you, and you don't need to justify it to anyone
Ok, firstly, I only see one red flag in this post. There are no issues with a guy having sentimental attachments to his childhood items – I feel like you're trying to find a problem in that because you think it's an “ick”.
Secondly, plenty of guys struggle to finish in the bedroom, and it's more common than you think. Drawing negative attention to the situation won't help matters though. If you like the guy and want to make things work, communicate with him about his like and dislikes in the bedroom and explore sex together. Sex isn't a race and nor should you be keeping a scorecard.
In terms of the taking time off work part. I can see where he's coming from maybe? Favouritism at work is incredibly frustrating and he's perfectly within his rights to take time off work if he's entitled to it. It probably did him a lot of good if he was experiencing burn out because of his job.
So the red flag I didn't like was how he spoke about his colleague. This could well be a result of work frustrations again. But how someone speaks about another behind their back says a lot about their character. Keep any eye on that kind of behaviour.
But from reading your post, it looks like you might be looking for reasons to not like this guy. In which case, you need to sit down with yourself and decide if that's the case or not.
Good luck!
Thank you for your response! Meshing with other people will help. I didn’t realize how bad it was until recently and now take her jokes as “don’t make friends with them” as more sincere efforts to isolate me as her therapist. Will definitely be ghosting.
Get in line 😉
I would say it's pretty common to be attracted to the scent of your partner…
Noted. But honestly she says she is sad but it is so overused that I am beginning to doubt it. She is home-sick yes. But there is honestly no other reason to be depressed.. I know her life back and forth.
Jeff goldblum said that in jurassic park in 1993.
Open marriages are always a bad idea
“Sorry I'm bisexual, we can only be fuckbuddies.”
Then do not have a baby for 5 years and go to gigs, go out, have holidays together. Be two adults having fun. Get off the bandwagon and live the life you want to online, not the stereotypical one.
Collect evidence.
Talk to a lawyer.
After you k iw how the divorce process works and how it will shake out for you, you have the opportunity to have one last heart to heart. Let him know it's his last chance, and he has to take immediate action to resolve the issue which could be counseling or therapy. He has to make the effort here, not you. If it comes to divorce, and he starts giving you grief, let him k iw that you will be telling your family and his family why you are getting divorced, and you have the proof to show everyone. At least he can't spin the truth and blame it all on you. Addiction or not, no one is likely to take any if that story lightly.
“…every single person who has bought family a house keeps it in their name and at most does a life estate…”
That not only isn’t true it’s a really awkward and inflexible method. A trust and trustee is much more flexible and efficient. I’ve used it to buy and/or 4 houses for family members in the last 10 years.
BTW, the brother isn’t the only person “in finance” ?
Two things, you have trouble opening up, so you’re not going to get involved quickly or have as many options. Others open up quicker, thus have more options, and don’t stay single as long. So what you believe is a reflection of interest and commitment is simply a reflection of how open you vs your partner are. If you’re worried about interest or commitment that’s reflected in how you treat each other once in a relationship. And fir that, google the importance of validation in relationships, bids for attention in relationships, magic relationship ratio, and conflict resolution skills, as how well you both do that for each other is more an indication of interest and commitment that how slowly or quickly you commit in the beginning.
I’m happy to give him enough space to have an affair, just so he is respectful and nice to me. I have tried talking, asking him what he wants, counselling, etc. he is just not interested
He would have to spend roughly a dollar a minute.
That’s really fucking weird and none of the reasons I can think of for why someone would do this are good with the most harmless one being she’s a gold digger
How long has you known each other before you started dating?
Deep down, I know that in the end, the relationship wasn't right for me. I tried not to show it, but I was really hurt every time she gave me different reasons (ex. losing interest / busy / want more tension in relationship / etc) to break up with me.
But now I understand that she did it not because she didn't love me, but because she wanted to better understand her own feelings and “test” the strength of my love. That was the toxic & immature aspect on her. But now that I understand that deep down she always loved me, what I did after the break up made me suffer in pain. Thus, I'm thinking that maybe me and her could grow together and become better partners in the future. I at least know that I grew as a person and could be a better person for her.
It's just that if I tell her everything, it will surly make the process of healing difficult. It's already super difficult for her (and for me). Do you think that telling the full story to someone you love is the right thing to do even when it would make her suffer more pain?
Yeah but thing is he was on his phone. Multiple times he was on snapchat just talking to his friends during the event. Guess it left a bad taste in my mouth when he could talk to his friends but wouldn’t bother to respond to me
I don't think that it has to do with either of those. She's never expressed interest in a threesome with another man, and I've told her I wouldn't feel comfortable with it as well.
There are no rules but you two sound like a good fit for it. Do you two communicate well? Because shit is going to happen and you two are going to need to talk it out without yelling at each other.
Need an update on this.
So instead of talking to a therapist, he talks about a private matter to a group of friends, who will in turn mention it to others at some point. Then comes back to justify it. That's a pretty awful person.
There is no excuse for his blatant insensitivity.
Sadly, as a teacher around young people a lot, I encounter many young men lacking social skills and lacking a mouth filter. Because I see a lot of immaturity in young men, I worry about my school-aged daughter being able to find a well-socialzed young man someday. They are a minority.
Because good men are hot to find today, you have a decision to make. Do you work to correct your BF's focused insensitivity, or do you chance it and start new somewhere else? This decision is yours to make.
You can try to talk to him about it. It is great that you recognize that your breasts have imperfections too. Reality is a good place to start your conversation with him. You need to tell him how hurtful his words are, and that it ruins intimacy for you. You should also include him in conversations about any future body modifications; although, the final decision regarding your body should be all yours.
That said, I can tell you that men get turned-on visually. So, I have to ask …other than another operation, can you do anything to maximize your sexy look for him? Can you accent other parts of your body that are sexy? Can you mask the parts you don't think are sexy? Would you consider wearing sexy half-bras or even getting tattoos?
I went there because a previous GF was a mom, and she was sensitve to scars and stretch marks from her time being pregnant. She would hide them from me by always wearing a garter belt or leaving her skirt on.
Best of luck.
The best thing to do is to be open and honest with her.
Start out by asking her if you're interpreting things right. If not, then you'll be saving yourself some embarrassment. If you are, then let her know if you're open to it or not. You said you're on the fence. I think you should really think about that, too.
Also, does the boyfriend know it's an open relationship? You shared this in the cheating exposed subreddit. If she's just saying that it's open and that's not truly the case, then I would find a way to let the boyfriend know she's telling others she's available. If both parties agreed to an open relationship, then disregard this last bit.