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Why blow up her spot? She’s sending them to someone that’s not you. Please respect her privacy.
Make a light hearted joke about it. Ask her if she if it's as good as it sounds.
If she’s completely inconsiderate of his time and life but has issue with his decisions that don’t affect her life in a comparably meaningful way start planning your exit. Planning your exit is just collect other options until one is good enough to jump ship for. A lot like job hunting …
Nailed it! ?
Get evidence of what shes doing. Record from your phone. Hide it somewhere or a camera. Take photos of any bruises she leaves. When you have enough evidence AND its safe for you and your kids go to the police or someplace safe. If you stay in this relationship it wont just be you whos hurting your kids will too.
Also, users rom r/legaladvice may be able to help you more. Look them up on reddit
I didn’t want to go along with it. He showed up to walk me home and my boss asked if he wanted a job. I didn’t really know about it until I got off work
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Leave. Don't look back. You were there for her hardest part of life and got her through her depression which is awesome. But then, when she felt better about herself, she left you in the dust. Personally, I'd feel used if that happened, but that's just me. She's at least being honest that she can't commit to your relationship. Because it's very apparent that she can't. She's enjoying her weight loss, her new feel-good attitude far too much to settle down right now. She wants to enjoy it. While there is nothing wrong with that, she is wrong for stringing you along in the process. She wants to keep you around so that if she falls back into those bad times, you are there to pick up the pieces again. Please don't allow that to happen. Please have more self-respect than that. You are worth more than that. It'll be naked, but block her everywhere, stop talking to her, and cut off all connections with her.
“Period cramps. Jesus. If I only had $20 for every girl that used that as a teen.” Sounds pretty mean the other way around, huh?
No one has ever gone through puberty as both a boy and a girl, so you have no idea what it's like as a boy. I also have no idea what it's like as a girl. But I trust and listen to girls when they say that period cramps suck. It would be nice to have the same courtesy extended.
Perhaps you enjoy the compliments you receive because you wanted to be a cook, but I don't see that as fishing for compliments. You just have a talent that you love to share. Nothing wrong with that.
We haven’t had many chances to see her and my mother was really hoping to have both of us there for once.
Don't forget to use the phrase we are just like sisters a lot
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We have been living with my mom for the past few months and it has been really naked on our relationship and individually. My mom is a bit of a hoarder and this makes my boyfriend crazy but also it makes him not participate in chores or dishes. I gladly do all the cooking but his unhelpfulness over the last few months has been the main reason we fight. I have trouble working 40 hours and doing all the cooking and cleaning. I have a horrible temper and being at my mom’s triggers my ptsd so I have been struggling to control my emotions. Plus just being exhausted from having to be my boyfriends full time house servant really doesn’t make it easier. I’ve had some really nasty days and he knows that this environment is toxic for me and not ideal. We would never have been here if it was not the only option.
Well in October we decided to start apartment hunting. No luck the market is terrible and we don’t make enough. Cue more fights.
About a month ago he tells me he found a place. I’m excited and just want to get out. We work completely opposite schedules so in order to expedite the process I said to him to just go see it himself and let me know. He comes back tells me it’s nice and we should go for it.
I’m happy and say ok go ahead with the application and ask if I need to do one. He said no and I think it’s weird but ok I trust him. And my credit sucks so I figured this was better and I would just be added as a roommate.
So as it turns out he completely blindsided me and got the apartment all for himself with no intentions of me moving out with him. He keeps saying that I can move in eventually but that wasn’t part of our original plan.
I’m so heartbroken I feel like he broke my trust. He saying I’m being dramatic and enforcing a narrative when I say I feel like I’m being abandoned. I want to break up and have said so many times but he won’t leave my moms house and just keeps insisting it’ll be fine. I’m not sure what to do?
tldr; boyfriend is moving out without me even though we agreed to do it together keeps saying nothing about relationship will change.
I see what you mean. I used gay to identify him and avoid confusion at first, and stopped using friend after describing what he did. I apologize if I offended anyone
I just dont want to come off as controlling, insecure or wanting to ruin his fun.
Seriously? This was not self defence.
I would encourage you to see a therapist. That will help you with the depression and how to navigate things with your parents. I suspect that your parents may be manipulating you into thinking some things are normal when they most decidedly are not if they felt comfortable doing this.
No, your title should read my boyfriend is cheating on me, do you plan on putts up with a cheater? FYI, you should not put up with a cheater!
I can relate because I'm similar to your boyfriend lol. He might be unaware of how negative he comes across and how its impacting the people in his life. Sit and talk with him, tell him how its affecting the relationship. Set boundaries, stuff like no politics when you're spending time together. Keep him accountable when he slips back into negativity. Tell him to find more people who share the same interests in politics as him. Good luck.
May be she couldn't afford it and she trying to buy herself some time .
Just another reason not to have a gender reveal!
I've lost family. I know many people who have lost family. I don't know of anyone who resorted to violence in their grieving though.
Fly you fool
Just tryin to point out that your wife is probably right and you should stop trying to make a bad decision for your family, goodluck.
You are prioritizing someone who doesn't prioritize you. Your bf is immature and does not meet your emotional needs. You've told him how you feel. He has made no effort. It may be time to move on.
It sounds like you’re the male version of dickmatized. You’re not thinking clearly.
Use protection and make sure it’s your own you brought with you. Or she will have 6 kids….and 4 baby daddies.
fuck that. leave the poor woman ALONE. you are a PARASITE in her life.
I always hate it when people tell their partner some thing like this. First of her ex didn’t come back and probably doesn’t want to. But instead of facing reality, she’s taking her pain out on the one person who is shown up for her and loved her. I don’t know if you want to stay with her after that I think I would feel tainted. And frankly it’s been such a short time of dating. I probably would just cut her off and let her go. Nobody wants to be second choice.
Please I am not crying, I didn’t mean to offend anyone, what structural problem if I may ask?
Oh crap
Yeah that's fucked up. If this anger is about other things or if he's just an asshole fine, but objectively this was not OP's day to do this task and standing her ground is in no way something to apologize for.
If her boyfriend is feeling stretched thin with his work schedule and home duties that's a conversation they need to have level headed. Calling people names instead of talking about what bothers you is for children, and he's acting like a child.
We split everything 50/50, so I don't pay for anything for him. He has a steady job, just not good with his money.
I agree that if you are minus 20k in money, you shouldn't want to buy something that costs literally 35k.
Unsafe; he has said that he gets really frustrated and feels like he “picks him up too rough”- he told me this recently sense I got back from being out of town. And I didn’t leave them alone. My brother was here to help. Am I worried he’s going to severely injure or kill our child? No. But he is visibly angry and frustrated which makes the whole process of getting him soothed and back to sleep much more difficult. I am not sure if you have kids but, they can definitely tell and feel when you are upset with them. Which in turn makes them more upset.
I think you need a legal consult. Her actions indicate she is leaving you without you knowing.
That’s fair. Any advice on how I can get over this? I really hate that I’m even feeling this way. I hate myself for it. I guess that’s part of why it’s bothering me so much
He's a veteran in these streets ???
Accept that you are not going to change him. No one has that power, nor is it your responsibility.
Setting an alarm to wake up for work is completely reasonable and responsible.
What you can do is raise your concerns and have an adult conversation. Can he wear earplugs to sleep?
Is the drinking a deal breaker for you?
Does he work on a different schedule than you?
Sincerely curious about how you didn't know about his drinking, unless you thought he'd change or you could change him once you moved in together (relationship fallacy #1).
“…he can acknowledge that it’s a socialized preference that is irrational, but it’s strong and subconscious enough to turn him off from sex.”
He told you it’s ingrained enough to be unable to have sex with you. The only way to “work through this” is accepting his irrational aversion and having to be clean shaven if y’all have sex. That’s something you need to process and make a decision before y’all get engaged. Oral sex from him is not a compromise. You’ll still have to shave, or have sex knowing he’s physically turned off by apart of you. Pleasuring each other should not be transactional.
Y’all talk about marriage and kids—all fundamental relationship pillars to be on the same page about. That’s great y’all are. But whether you acknowledge it or not, sex is a pillar you have to be on the same page about; that could be you conceding to shaving every time or leaving.
The main question is can you tolerate this dynamic for the rest of your life? Are you okay relying to frequent masturbation to be baseline satisfied?
It’s interesting you didn’t answer my question if he tries to satisfy you in other ways besides oral. Sexual compatibility isn’t just about this issue, it’s the emotional connection, sex drives, kinks (or lack there of), etc. I’d look at this as whole.
I agree with you completely. If she doesn't disbelieve the rumor, she should be helping you to resolve it. If she's OK with marrying you with this possibility, that brings her into question as well. Does she really think you may be hiding or abandoning a child and that's better than “causing trouble ” for someone accusing you of it? If you have an ex who never told you she was pregnant, dont you both need to know? Also, is she taking some unnamed person's word over yours?
Put the whole thing on hold indefinitely, if you don't want to call it off.
So he did so much all to die on this dumbass hill. This can only end well. So important to him he can go find your father on his own and not include you at all give him a name and tell him good luck
Doing this would be stupid. A person that cheats once will probably cheat again. Long distance relationships don’t work…unless they do and then you end up married for 40 years like me. But if you do this you are going to have to support the child into adulthood regardless of whether she cheats, doesn’t cheat, marries you, doesn’t marry you…you’re taking on a responsibility for another life. If that’s what you want to do regardless of how your relationship turns out…more power to you.
I wouldn't say a month and a half is too long, it just sounds like she was put off by the juvenile antics. This one is not a mystery.