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Not if innocent children are brought into the mix.
It’s things like this where I’m so glad I’m strict with a no kids policy for dating
Wtf your MIL think you are her ATM? or did i mistunderstand.
Maybe (most likely) it IS in your head, but you will never know until you let her know.
Best you can do is mention it to her in a non threatening way. Tell her how it makes you feel. Make clear that you don't want to judge her or blame her for anything, but you want to find a solution that is satisfying for the both of you.
As I type this, I have to admit this above advice is for you and me both. I guess we all struggle with communicating!
Best of luck friend.
Maybe just a yellow flag, not a red one. For purposes of this question, I would say that “in a relationship” includes a relationship in which the parties are just exploring the possibilities, even if they are in several such relationships at the same time.
Some people are so much in demand that people will line up for them whenever one of their relationships ends. Fair enough.
The people to be concerned about are the monkey-branchers. These people break up mentally, but don't let the other person know about it until they have their next person all ready to step in. This is often done so as not to lose some financial or other benefit that the monkey-brancher receives from the person they are leading on. This sort of deception can go on for months, or even years in the worst cases.
I think you cut your losses and move along.
I can't believe there is a possibility to break up because of that issue…its unbelievable
What they said may have been out of line, but you took it to another level by combing through their post history and brought up their SO who has nothing to do with this, then later making fun of their shaken baby. You’re such a child OP
Well at least SHE had the balls to tell you unlike the coward you are. You both need to grow up and learn to be adults in a relationship but at least she admitted her infidelities, you just want to play the victim when your just a coward.
Honestly, 6 years with a maximum of what 5-8 visits a month? No living together, no hints at marriage or kids? I'm betting you don't know his family very well do you? If so, is it because you “live in different “nearby” city”?
Sounds like you're his side piece and he's making excuses about moving in with you to avoid telling you about his wife and kid… I'm probably wrong, but what kind of MAN makes excuses like that?
Call your mom. Tell her what you've told us, all of it. Perhaps she can help you with funding. I know it will be very hot, but you can do it. You were wrong, she was right, and you're sorry.
And maybe revisit the idea that the only option is fleeing the country into anonymity. I'm guessing he's a cop? Maybe contact internal affairs for his department. I don't think the EU police system honors the “you get to beat your girlfriend if you want” privilege that is present in some countries. But use your best judgement.
You aren't going to get any advice here that is going to rekindle his interest. You might as well try a love potion for all the good such advice will do.
It hurts, but he's just not that into you and possibly never was. He is 20. I was an idiot when I was 20. Most people are! In comparison to their older selves at least.
Why are you so into him? Ask yourself; is it his amazing personality or is it his growing lack of interest and deliberate unavailability that is driving you to want him more? Thebkess he wants you, the more it seems to make you want him. It's worth reflecting on that. He's a 20 year old boy who isn't treating you very well. Come on, you can do better.
End it on your terms before he ends it on his. He potentially lacks the maturity to spare your feelings or avoid humiliating you. Tell him that it's become clear that he isn't really that interested in the kind of relationship you are looking for. Tell him it feels you are a lot more into him than he is into you and that's not healthy for you so you are ending it.
And, on behalf of all future partners and for yourself, please, please please don't let yourself become one of those people who obsesses over a pathetic specimen of an ex, who can't move on and let's obsession with this one guy poison the next couple of relationships. Put him out of your head and move on
Yes, thank you. This is good advice. Out of all the times I've tried to explain to him what he does or does not do, it always ends the same. He will try to change or he dismisses my feelings. I will put the blame on myself and my mental health. I want to feel better and I know I have the best chance to do so away from him. I also have friends and family who are supporting my decision and will be there for me.
You need to leave him. He’s the abuser and immature.
Right, and the bite had to be bad enough that she went to the ER, needed stitches, and will have a permanent facial scar. Thats….a lot to take in.
Pathetically fake.
Op it doesn't matter if you don't want to leave her, she doesn't what to be with you, she is literally repulsed by your touch… It's over, you said it yourself you feel like your are raping her dude, she doesn't want you
she replied to me that she acts like this because of her sleeping problems, and that she it not going to apologize for it (she does say that she understands it though). So she basically told me that I have to on-line with it, or I have to leave her. And even though this bothers me, she is still the best person i’ve ever met.
Yikes. Her views on relationships is really unhealthy. She is still responsible for her behaviour even if she is not feeling well. She should definitely apologize when she is mean to you. She is basically telling you she won't change or take accountability for her behaviour because she doesn't feel like it.
Saying she is the best person you ever met is pretty strange too. She seems pretty self centered. Her being great (according to her) also doesn't excuse bad behaviour.
Also, if she is having trouble sleeping she should talk to a doctor and perhaps do a sleep study. Maybe she needs to work on her sleep hygiene. Her health is also her responsibility and she should be getting treatment if her sleeping is causing her problems and hurting her relationship..
Honestly, I don't know how uou can make a relationship work when your partner doesn't take accountability for their behavior..
Honestly it’s not even worth fighting with her, she’s not someone you wanna keep around. Send her the screenshots of your boyfriend’s dm’s, then block her & never talk to her again. Make your boyfriend do the same.
I'm sorry but she hangs around till 8:00 when you get home at 5:30 yeah that's way too long. I love my mother but that would drive me crazy. Tell your mom thank you by 6:30 unless you're feeding your dinner that you really appreciate your help but you you need her to get out of there so you can get the kids settled into bed. If she goes oh I'll do it for you, say no I really enjoy doing it myself and I want to spend time with the kids since I've been gone all day. She ought to understand that. She's probably trying to spend time with the kids herself but she's not realizing she's forcing you out and not letting you have time with your own kids trying to do it from that perspective. Obviously you don't want to say get the hell out of here you're staying too long. If she gets upset say Mom I love you I really appreciate everything you do but once I'm home I just want to be with my husband and the kids and when you hang around for another two two and a half hours it doesn't let us have any family time together.
Our relationship is great otherwise
Besides him having you give him blow jobs, eating his ass that you don't like, refusing to go down on you because “he doesn't like it” AND won't kiss you when you want him to
*Our relationship is great otherwise*
I don't know if I should laugh or cry.
It especially doesn't make sense because you don't say he needs viagra. Taking viagra when you don't need it either does nothing or gives you a painful, hours-long erection. Like, you really think the one time he decided to cheat on you would be the time he decides to experiment with viagra. . .?
Treat him? You mean like lying?
I'm reading some of these comments and I have no fucking clue how there is any division here at all.
You're in an abusive relationship and you need to get out of it so you can find someone who will treat you with dignity.
She just wants to cheat. Like it doesn’t get any clearer than this.
Both of you should have ended it a long time ago. She doesn’t want sex with you and she knows it. She’s been stringing you along for years and giving you just enough to give you hope.
You should have left the marriage instead of cheating. There is no excuse for cheating. Once you realized you wanted out in that moment bayou should have turned around and informed her it was over the same way you did after you cheated.
Both of you have harmed each other and both of you are the bad guy.
You are 100% responsible for your own fertility. If you’re having sex and don’t want to be a father, wear a condom. Your girlfriend’s “preference” doesn’t trump your need to protect yourself.
When I was a virgin I needed to feel completely safe around my boyfriend to be ready for sex. That took about 6 months. The first time for many is a very scary and emotional thing. Given she's never had sex I'd say she's afraid and it's worth talking to her about it and also explaining how much it means to you in the relationship so you can get on the same page without pressure and understand it from both sides.
There are apps that will hid other apps.
No, I wouldn't stay..
Yes yes op!!!! This commenter said it perfectly
If you stay with him or keep the baby, the situation with his mother will not change. She will be heavily involved in his decision making process regarding anything with her grandchild. That's the mindset you should have going into this. No wishful thinking about how things could be. Look at it as things are right now and ask yourself if you are willing to on-line like this for the rest of your life. Because she will absolutely continue to give her 2 cents regarding your kid, whether you stay with the father or not
Oh good call!
Did you read my post? It was an arranged marriage and I did not know her situation when I married her. not my fault.
Telling you it doesn't hurt you and that it's nothing is gaslighting. I agree with others that he's conditioning you to accept abuse. Time to say bye to this guy
Gotta do what you need to do to survive. Your moms a piece of shit, your brother is also a piece of shit, make sure your ducks are in a row and block your mom from your life.
then take the whole wedding hostage in an elaborate escape room scenario.
Agree, a Batman blazer from Hero Within or a pair of Superman cuff links is very different than full cosplay, and I don’t see why either would be a problem.
WAY too fast!!
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I don’t know why I had the urge to check on his phone thoroughly even if he’s giving me consent to access it and telling me, “I’m not hiding anything”.
I found on his Youtube history the videos he watched. Consistently a certain video of sexy girl compilation from tiktok. Top famous girls, new influencers, and youtube series of “what not to ask to an escort”. (This bothers me a fckn lot)
Now, I know the reason why he’s not asking to see my armpits anymore bcs he’s been well satisfied with the videos he watches. (his fetish btw)
AND ALSO, a video on how to get a girl to like you. like WTF? He told me he watched that when I got mad at him. Like how tf could a man think his gf whose been begging him not to cheat won’t like him or wont have feelings for him.
I’ve addressed to him that the sexy girls he follows on his social media bothers me a lot and asked him to stop following them bcs it hurts my feelings. His solution? “deleting his IG” and “deactivating his fb account”
Here I thought, we’ve had solved our issues but he’s been giving himself a lot of temptations. Tomorrow morning, I’m going to leave right away and imma say my last goodbyes to his grandma for taking care of me and for cooking my favorite meals.
rn he’s sitting across me babbling about his excuses I ain’t interested on hearing. I felt so disrespected
I don’t know if this is cheating but srsly i don’t think this is right.
He’s applying for a job in NZ and will move to his parents. idk if this is his preparation for possible LDR that he’s gonna resort to pay women to have sex with him. I’m just disgusted
wow
He’s in his mid 30s and should have zero problems paying the bills let alone ask you for YOUR scholarship money. No. No. And no. Leave him, and do your own thing. He will always find ways to make sure you do most of it all and he will never be helpful, I promise. LEAVE HIM.
While there definitely are middle eastern guys that act this way, the thing is, my boyfriend truly is a feminist both in what he believes and in how he acts. If he realizes I’m cleaning up after him, he’ll help me, but he often just is unaware. He actually cooks for us nine times out of ten, or takes the lead in prepping meals while I help, and his dad is really helpful around the house as well. His brother is actually gay, so not a stereotypical overly macho guy, but he’s just a rude person independent of that haha.
Her issue isn’t the photos of him and his ex. It’s the 20 nudes and 10 sex videos of her that is the issue.
In what way? He was weeping over his kid, not you. I’m not sure why you’ve not yet petitioned for child support. You need to do that sooner than later.