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In this situation, however, OP is the one who brought up if the girlfriend would hypothetically like an open relationship. They wrote that after the two of them were discussing the relationship of these two fictional characters, OP is the one who pivoted to directly asking about their own relationship. So I don't think the example above is a good fit.
I totally agree that you can't get mad at your partner for crossing boundaries they don't know exist.
OP's post has a pretty immature vibe. They need to have an honest conversation with their partner, rather than jumping to 'my year is ending in turmoil' after their partner casually answered a hypothetical question. Maybe there is an issue here regarding compatibility on non-monogamy. Maybe there isn't. What seems like the much bigger issue is OP jumping to reddit in a panic instead of just starting with a quick, 'Hey, when I asked you about a hypothetical open relationship last night I was surprised by your answer. It actually freaked me out a little bit because I'm really not open to that. Can you tell me more about your thoughts on that?'