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59 thoughts on “Alice-fox on-line sex chats for YOU!”
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Ha! You are absolutely correct ? I love that response. Thanks! ?
Yea.. no. He's lying. I've been with my husband since 2011 and we've been married for 5 years now. We are still extremely attracted to one another. He doesn't look at other women sexually, wether it be on-line or in real life, and I don't look at men in the same regard. We love each other that much to the point it's like we have blinders on for anyone else.
If I were you, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship like that and I hope you consider leaving him because that's a huge problem in a serious relationship that's hard to overcome. Your future with him does sound bleak, but your future without him doesn't have to be. Please, choose yourself.
Yes, unfortunately, he started throwing every little thing he’s done in my face out of nowhere and when I reminded him I do just as much like “hey I just bought you lunch (nothing fancy but lunch is lunch) I rub your back, I help make your bed etc. Yes I do reciprocate” his response was something to the effect of : “well duh, your supposed to do that it doesn’t count why would you even bring that stuff up ” just really weird
Sounds like you've been ignoring red flags for too long. This is a man who does not seem to want to take responisibilty for failure, and probablty needs anger therapy.
We’re both 19
$800 for an hour with two girls is actually cheap. The girls are the ones that got ripped off.
I’ve done that. I feel like I think I look different than what I do and I will take pictures especially from Behind to see what I look like. Especially since I’ve been eating healthy and working out. It helps to see my progress.
If I take a bunch of pics and never sent any…. I would probably brush it off when asked too. Why does it require an in depth explanation.
“What are those?”
“Oh nothing”
Because they aren’t. They weren’t good enough to send. They aren’t important enough to have a whole discussion about.
Especially if I didn’t like them and that’s why they were never sent…. I definitely don’t feel the need to have a discussion on pics of MY body in MY phone.
Im not going to say break up/cancel the wedding this soon, I think first you two need to talk about this and solve this problem with the therapist and if nothing changes thats when you should decide if you really want to continue this relationship
I promise it will be a world of difference. As long as he is receptive and understanding.
You don’t have to suffer in silence dude!!
Gently express how you feel, even if it seems/feels random to do it. Just getting your feelings out there helps a lot.
Hey…dummy….why are you waiting on US?
Your intuition is already telling you what to do.
Hope you aren't waiting for a building to fall on you.
Wake-up and take care of Yourself.
Your MH is in some deep doo-doo.
It’s sounds like you are dynamite in bed but insufferably clingy. I’d take that as a win and work on your independence.
divorce him as soon as you can you deserve better
You are NOT grown up enough to have a kid, full stop. You act like you are 12 and you are 100% WRONG about just about everything you have said about bc.
You act like a child. Don’t have any.
It does not matter what anyone else says. You consider it cheating. It is a boundary of yours they crossed.
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He was 18 and you were 38. You need to apologize for both your last interaction and for never reaching out again, and tell him you love him and willing to do what it takes to build back a relationship and trust. Tell him you’re proud of him for what he’s made of himself. If he doesn’t want to talk, leave him a letter saying what you want. I can imagine he’d be deeply hurt and unloved by the fact that his dad basically wrote him off and never made any attempts at talking again.
I don’t know what he did that was bad enough to justify not talking to him for four years. If there are certain safety boundaries you’d like to set, do that after there’s been some initial mutual reconciliation.
Also – Many of us are not actually ready for college and deciding what we want to do with our adult lives at only 18. Exploration, rebellion, lack of interest in school or work – That’s pretty normal for a teenager. But maybe he did worse. You didn’t give much explanation for why he was so bad.
Then stop setting your sights so high that you feel down when you don't achieve them. Start with appreciating what you have, try some week holidays alone or find a travel buddy, people on the travel forum on here say where there going and when and ask if people want to meet up. If you really don't think you can do the things your scared off then you may just have to accept that and do the things you are able to.
'I get snappy and try to rush them' and 'I'm never actually that rude' do not go together in the same post.
Unless you have a serious medical condition, behaviour like this is really unacceptable in adults. Funnily enough, the majority of people get headachey, nauseous and spacey when very hungry. The trick is to eat at regular times and have a mid afternoon snack. No one should be that ravenously hungry at a restaurant unless they have literally eaten nothing all day.
I have a family member that has ruined family events with meltdowns because there was some kind of delay in getting the meal on the table (eg 6:30pm instead of 6). Now, most events are tinged with anxiety and stress when she's invited as food MUST be on the table at a certain time.I would be surprised if your family doesn't tiptoe around you the same way and you just don't realise it.
If you have eaten a healthy lunch at an appropriate time, I refuse to believe it's anything other than being mollycoddled your entire life that leads you to think your 'hunger'is different than anyone elses.
“Boyfriend” LOL you’re right to put that in quotation marks.
You’ve already wasted too much time on this guy, move on.
Your mom is absolutely right.
Any time I have noticed behavior like this from a girl I was dating it turned out to be the beginning of the end. Trust your gut… something is fishy here. Has she ever done anything like this before?
I am looking for clarification of why someone with abandonment issues will push me away when they’re afraid of the result of doing just that?
Short answer: One reason is that, over time, her abandonment grows so strong and painful that she will preemptively abandon you to stop the pain and to prevent you from abandoning her. But the main reason for this puzzling behavior, Megan, is that a person with BPD (pwBPD) has two very strong fears — not just one.
Long answer: When you're dating an untreated pwBPD, Megan, whatever you do will be hurtful to her much of the time. A comment or action that pleases her on one day may greatly offend her when repeated a week later. Moreover, she often will perceive you as being hurtful when you DO something and hurtful when you DON'T do it. You therefore often are damned if you do and damned if you don't.
This conundrum is due to the position of her two great fears — abandonment and engulfment — at opposite ends of the very same spectrum. This means you often find yourself in a lose/lose situation because, as you back away from one fear to avoid triggering it, you will start triggering the fear at the other end of that same spectrum.
Your predicament is that the solution to calming her abandonment fear (drawing close and being intimate) is the very action that triggers her engulfment fear. Likewise, the solution to calming her engulfment fear (moving back away to give her breathing space) is the very action that triggers her abandonment fear.
Consequently, as you move close to comfort her and assure her of your love, you eventually will start triggering her engulfment fear, making her feel like she's being suffocated and controlled by you.
Granted, a pwBPD usually craves intimacy like nearly all other adults — but she cannot tolerate it for very long. Because she has a weak sense of self-identity, she easily becomes very enmeshed in your strong personality during sustained periods of closeness and intimacy.
This is why her sense of personal boundaries is so weak that she has difficulty seeing where HER feelings and problems stop and YOURS begin. Yet, as you back away to give her breathing space, you often will find that you've started triggering her abandonment fear.
In my 15 years of experience with my BPD exW, I found that there is no midpoints solution (between “too close” and “too far away”) where you can safely stand to avoid triggering those two fears. Until a pwBPD learns how to better regulate her own emotions and tame her two fears, that Goldilocks position will not exist. This is why a relationship with an untreated pwBPD typically is characterized by a repeating cycle of push-you-away and pull-you-back.
Indeed, even if you are sitting perfectly still and not saying a word, a pwBPD who is experiencing hurtful feelings will project those feelings onto you. Her subconscious does this to protect her fragile ego from seeing too much of reality — and to externalize the pain, getting it outside her body.
Because that projection occurs entirely at the subconscious level, she will consciously be convinced that the painful feeling or hurtful thought is coming from you. This is why an untreated pwBPD usually BELIEVES the false accusations coming out of her mouth (at the moment she is saying them).
Hence, as long as you remain in a relationship with an untreated pwBPD, you often will find yourself hurting her — i.e., triggering her engulfment fear as you draw near, triggering her abandonment fear as you draw back, and triggering her anger even when you are sitting still and saying absolutely nothing.
That tuff dude, drink up
She said she wouldn't mind the DNA test if it wasn't a plan that he made with his ex behind her back.
Honey you don’t need to stay and let grandpa abuse you. You’re allowed to leave. You’re a grown ass woman with two legs, walk yourself out of this senior center drama show and move on with your life
Pretty simple really – she goes or OP does. When he waffles you file for divorce.
Your fiance is a tool. I hope you and the other kid stay safe. Maybe put up some cameras and stuff.
I read that and said what tf
He doesn’t want to be a father, he thinks he can trap you in the relationship permanently (or until you turn 25 and he starts the cycle over again with someone else) by knocking you up. Children are one of the biggest ways abusers control their victims. Him breaking up with you is the best thing that could possibly happen to you, don’t go crawling back to him like he expects you to.
Well, the first thing I would point out is that an imminent departure can make feelings more intense. When you know someone is leaving, it can add an artificial drama that increases the intensity of your emotion. Not real.
The second thing I would tell you is that if the relationship is real, if your connection is really that strong, there is no distance in the world that can come between you. What you don't want to do is sacrifice your dream of Rome now and find out in two years that it was just an infatuation.
It happens when your “habit memory” system takes over in place of your “prospective memory” system. Sadly, anyone can be affected, and the phenomenon is become increasingly well known: because of the number of children accidentally left in cars.
I’d suggest you do some research on the phenomenon and present her with it.
Yes, you were. Friends don't rape friends. Regardless of if you/they have been drinking.
If you feel empowered, I would highly suggest reporting them. At the very least they need to be cut out of your life.
facepalm Why would you want to keep tabs on a girl you just had a “raunchy ” hook up with? Not really smart you told her a hook up story and not smart you argued with her about this. Most girls would have reacted like she did.
I don't really agree with her following an ex but it's much better than a random raunchy hook up. If you don't care why would you bother arguing just to be right. The point is it bothered her and the girl was a random hook up. Your gfs feelings should be more important than being right.
That’s the way. Say hello, goodbye. Don’t engage any further.
Seriously, it sounds like she would harm herself.
I’m a SAHM and enjoy it, but it is good to have some sense of self. If your life is so wrapped up in your husband that you would hurt yourself should the relationship end that isn’t healthy.
We have talked about all this as long as I can remember. I addressed this in detail when it came up during the 3rd or 4th year of our relationship.
It is always the same circular argument from her;
“I hate to do things alone, I don't enjoy being alone. I don't enjoy traveling alone. I don't like doing anything alone.”
Me; “ok that means you should make friends. So go take some classes, talk to people, be more active, go to the gym, go for Meetups, Facebook events. Sign up for Tinder/Bumble, meet people”
Her: “you cannot make friends as adults. It doesn't work, and people are boring and lame. I can't stand them and nobody likes me”
….
You’re wrong. Most men don’t take the hint. Even a wedding ring won’t put off a lot of them.
Giving them what they want (your number) is often the only way to get rid of them. A fake number is just fine because you’re not actually interested. She’s just protecting herself. Let her do it.
She's moving forward without you. Accept that and move on.
Which is a rare case. Generalising for the exception is wrong. In my opinion
Ok then why are you posting here?
You should sit down and watch Hostel together…
It sounds like your BF is open to learning, which is huge for people who have been indoctrinated by religion. Honestly, that’s a great sign. I’m a member of the LGBTQ+ community and have been an activist for decades, so I have a strong sense of purpose and goals. But I do not automatically exclude people who are willing to be supportive. We often win hearts and minds slowly.
Well he hid it because he thought he had the other job so he wouldn’t be left with nothing. But, since I’m pretty sure he name dropped them in his rant, someone could easily have told the other job and they’d have rescinded it even if they HAD offered it to him. So point taken.
It sounds like your BF is open to learning, which is huge for people who have been indoctrinated by religion. Honestly, that’s a great sign. I’m a member of the LGBTQ+ community and have been an activist for decades, so I have a strong sense of purpose and goals. But I do not automatically exclude people who are willing to be supportive. We often win hearts and minds slowly.
You're not going to communicate like an adult with a racist. They're mentally childish and very selfish. They think they're better than everyone so you talking to them is percieved as you not staying in your place.
This woman literally told you guys she's not doing anything you say bc she's got a Master's. She thinks she's smarter than you, and you being stupid means you can't tell her what to do.
I hate to break it to you but she's not going to change. I live! with someone exactly like this, except he also hates women. It's trying. Nothing I've tried has worked so far. Nothing. He's not interested in having a healthy living situation. He wants to do what he wants to do when he wants to do it. Anyone trying to stop him is percieved as a threat and he reacts accordingly.
I cannot tell you how many nights I've cried myself to sleep after dealing with him. He's a horrible human being. Sometimes I wish I'd get a call saying he's dead.
What helps is not talking to him more than necessary. I freeze him out. I don't respond to his texts. I ignore him unless it's directly related to the house – like a bill or something is due.
I've stopped cleaning to teach him a lesson but he doesn't care. Filth doesn't bother him. He eats spoiled meat. Now I just clean around his messes.
I looking for a better-paying job so I can replace his income and oay his 1/3 of the bills. Then I can put him out. That's the only solution I have.
Good luck.
Yeah idk it would have been a deal breaker for me when there are so many other possible people to date who would actually find you attractive instead of someone saying “they act great, but I wasn't gonna stick around because they're unattractive.”
You clearly can't, and neither can he. You're flirting with each other, and you're not with him romantically rn because your bf is a “safer” choice and Kyle can't give you a ring.
No people just have a tendency to hear buzz words and fly off into their own little political debate that is irrelevant to the conversation. You’re right it’s not just you!
And do you think what he did wasn’t just flirting?
You really need to be educated on chid rearing. “Respect her parentts” she’s two for god sake.
You’ll tramatise this poor child with your ignorance. Good she has an aunt to watch over her. Poor child
Good ideas aren't really his thing.
You're fucked in the head if you think kids should be taught to do something with shock and pain.
If you think you turned out all right after you were beaten you're wrong, because you are trying to justify this.
This is why children shouldn't have children.
Not as affordable now as it was when I moved to the DFW area 8 years ago. It’s getting pricey but still cheaper than when I lived in Jersey.
It's very hot to argue against experience and wisdom. I have come to respect my mom's intuition and advice when it comes to people because she is always spot on.
I don't know what you and your boyfriend are arguing about, but anyone who isolates you is abusive. And their behavior will become more controlling. Consider what your mom is saying. Consider the advice she has given you throughout your life. Does SHE have your best interest at heart? What about your boyfriend? Is he thinking of you… or of himself?
Ah, another person that doesn't actually know what the first amendment does.
The first amendment protects “certain kinds” of speech from the government. Not social reprecussions.
Exactly. It’s all on you and you make a decision at some point. If you don’t make it then, you’ve still made a decision.
Based solely on the information you've provided, I suspect she doesn't actually want a serious relationship, and that she may possibly have a fear of abandonment. She wants to be able to on-line her life free of commitment, yet still have you around to comfort her when she needs it. To me, her reluctance to be physically affectionate is indicative of not wanting a romantic relationship. Her willingness to kiss and hug you is her way of doing JUST enough to keep you from leaving.
Hopefully I'm wrong, but that's the vibe I'm getting. If I'm right, then you're simply her “supply”, which she'll readily discard as soon as a more appealing supply comes along.
I see a lot of red flags and if I were you I would initiate a very real discussion about expectations of one another and your visions for the future. If she says she'll put forth more effort, give her a chance to show you her words are sincere. However, be ready to leave if her actions don't support her words.
Yes, I had mentioned to her mom and sister that I was thinking about proposing to her on Xmas. It was always her dream for an Xmas proposal (not sure why). Her mom was upset that her daughter basically gave that up. My ex has had some terrible bfs before me so her mom is upset that she messed up the one guy that has respected her and took care of her. Her past bfs were abusive.