My (29F) Husband (30M) is no longer attracted to me so I don’t want him in the delivery room anymore

Throwaway account because my friends and family know my main.

My husband Andrew and I are expecting our first child in just a few weeks. It was an unexpected pregnancy but we’re both excited and welcome this new chapter in our lives. We’ve discussed it prior that he would be present in the room with me as my support person. Some context – He has always been very sweet and caring. It took a little bit of communication and adapting to each others needs, but he’s now very very supportive and always makes sure my needs are met. I was more than happy with him being in the delivery room with me during what I’d consider one of the scariest times of my life and wanted him to experience seeing his daughter take her first breath. This was before our conversation last night.

My husband and I have been on a bit of a decline in terms of our sex life. It used to be good when we first started dating, and I thought we were sexually compatible, however, within the last year, it has done a 180. At first, he blamed it on stress, then finances, then his health, and I believed it all of it. I recommended things we could do to improve that or ways I could help lighten his load, but he assured me, he’d work on it himself. It never got better – in fact, it kept declining. We had another talk last night about this as I told him I was starting to feel like we were friends more than lovers and that’s when he confessed – he was no longer attracted to me. It had to do partly with me gaining a bit of weight during the pregnancy, but mostly due to my lifestyle changes.

When we first started dating, I had a lot more free time to take care of my body and weight. I was 5 4”and 115lbs. Curvy in all the right places and would get constant attention from men when I was single. We moved in shortly after dating, and I guess my priorities had changed, because now I had to work full-time 9-5, sometimes weekends, picked up a side gig and also did 90% of the cooking and cleaning at home. I had no time to prioritize the gym or working out and gained 10lbs since moving in and 30lbs since becoming pregnant (which I expect to lose most of after giving birth). Through all the tears last night during our conversation, I told him I would work on prioritizing my health and the gym again, and would make time to take care of my appearance so he was happy. However, when I mentioned that I didn’t want his view of me to change even more, so I think it’s best if he wasn’t in the room with me as I gave birth, he was extremely upset and disappointed. I told him giving birth wasn’t a spectator sport and I wanted him there initially because I felt supported by him and comfortable with him seeing me at my most vulnerable – crying, screaming, projectile shitting lol. Now that I know he’s no longer attracted to me, I’m willing to work on that, but I don’t think him seeing me in that way would help our sexual relationship at all.

Should I suck it up and let him in the delivery room even though I think it would affect how he views me?

EDIT TO ADD: For those wondering why I work so much if my husband earns as much as he does.. My workload is just very heavy that sometimes I will need to work on the weekends to meet deadlines. I’m not choosing to work extra shifts to make ends meet. My side gig is a personal project of mine that, although doesn’t bring in much, is full filing to me and I would like to one day grow it into a full time opportunity. For now though, I have to put in a few hours here and there, but it does add up.

EDIT TO ADD AGAIN: I want to clarify that the main issue isn’t just the numbers on the scale, but the lifestyle change. When we met, I was very active (going to the gym, sports, eating very healthy etc) and that was a turn on for him. The issue is now that I don’t have much time for those things, he doesn’t find me attractive anymore because I online a pretty sedentary lifestyle. I don’t have the energy or time to put towards prioritizing my health and wellness like I used to which led to the weight gain and it was a bit of a wake up call for me. I’m making these changes for me and the baby as well, not just for my husbands, but seeing all these comments regarding the household divide has me second guessing what fair contributions to our household looks like. I’ll be sitting down and speaking with him about redividing our tasks so it’s fair to the both of us and we each have time to spend on ourselves. 🙂 Him being in the delivery room will be dependent on how that conversation goes as well but I’ll be prioritizing my comfort above all during the birth!!

Thanks for your advice, everyone!