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So now you don't have to handle it because you're not dating anymore. He listened to your issue and solved your problem
Oh girl stop being soooo pushy, needy and making your relationship all about the engagement! So you are basically saying all of this year has been mostly about your guess work …instead of just letting him do his thing… obviously it's soooo freaking annoying! Get over yourself and trust your partner to make it special.
Do you call everyone that disagrees with you a child abuser? Do you call them toxic or a narcissist as well? I hope someone gives you a hug today. You should go outside and soak up some sun.
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Slow. Down. You’re not in a rush. Just keep in mind that you’re still young and of course wouldn’t know what you want. You’re still going to be going through major changes as a person in early adulthood.
No it’s because she accused him of doing it.
Maybe. That would have just been a different hurt.
You got this, man. Good luck.
It’s not time to move in. There are some conversations that need to be had about long term compatibility. Have a serious discussion about children, what each of you expects of the other, how to keep the household
If you sued him, do you think you would ever actually collect? It might just be a write-off.
The man has been in love with you for 15 years. You enjoy his attention, and his companionship, and you pretend that the relationship is mutually platonic, so you don't have to feel bad about his unrequited love, or think for one moment that you might be taking advantage of him.
Now, you have finally, belatedly, oh-so-johnny-come-lately-ly, realized that this guy might be the one you should have been with all this time. However, you are hesitant to pursue this, because it's been oh-so-convenient all these years to have a spare tire in the trunk, so to speak, and if you break up with him you might not have that any more.
We've been friends for a very long time, and I don't ever want to lose that.
You haven't been friends. He's been pining for you for a decade. You've been selfishly denying this to yourself. Now you say you have feelings for him? At what point will you suddenly realize how miserable he's been for the last ten years, watching you going out with other men? Hearing you complain about them, doubtless? Loving you from afar, and being helpless to do anything about it? All you can think about is your own feelings (“I don't ever want to lose that”). At what point will you start thinking about his feelings?
Look how careful he is with you. Even when you tell him you're interested, something he's been waiting for half his life, his asks you to be absolutely certain, because he's afraid you're going to hurt him again.
You've got two options here:
1) You finally realize that he's a good man, and you might love him, and you want to love him, and build a future with him. Call him up, tell him this, and tell him you're so sorry you were unable to see this for all these years. Start thinking about him, and not just about yourself, and maybe this relationship will last longer than your previous ones.
2) You objectively realize that he's not the one for you, and that's that. Apologize for stringing him along all these years. He'll accept it, and move out of your life.
3) Yeah, I said two, but this is probably the option you'll actually choose. You'll decide that having a safety net for yourself is more important than treating him like a person. You won't be able to overcome your underlying contempt for him for having waited for you all this time. You'll give him some waffle about having to work on yourself first, or not being ready mentally, something like that. Possibly, you'll do this after dating him for a couple of months. Then you'll dump him, and start dating someone else who is obviously just using you. Your best friend will then realize what he really is to you, and cut all contact with you. You will then come back to reddit and complain about men. “We were friends for years, but then I became single and wouldn't put out for him, so he ruined our friendship. Men are so selfish!”.
Sounds rough friend…I would say you should likely heed the advise of your therapist and wife. I think “Maggie” has moved on with life; evidenced by the fact that she approached you for a casual chat in the grocery store. I hope you find the closure you're looking for.
Correct! The only thing the Bible says about abortion is how to perform one.
nope, i was 14.
So you want to break up with your bf because your racist brother asked you to? Do I have that right?
Yea I’m fully on team punch racists. Your brother one day will mess with the wrong one and get much worse than a slap
They are never gonna change. They've shown you who they are several times and you're still not believing them. Why? Children don't need toxic people in their lives, even if they are family. Cut them off permanently. Get therapy so you can get out of the FOG. Fear, Obligation, and Guilt.
My husband cut his horrible mother off permanently almost 20 years ago, for the way she treated me. She hated me because in her mind, I took away her son. She was nasty to me and even worse to my former sil. She died several years ago.
I'm less concerned about your girl hooking up with someone else moments after you met, I'm sure alcohol was involved, than I am the fact that your “best friend” didn't tell you that he was the guy she fk'd during your nap.
That dude is not your friend.
“hi babe, can we talk for a bit? Im feeling a lack of intimacy with you outside of sex. I feel i need more physical attention like cuddles. This is a really important need for me and when you push me away it makes me feel hurt.”
You arent forcing him to do anything. He decides if he wants to listen to your wants and be more physically affectionate with you.
The power imbalance is exactly why it's unethical and generally forbidden by registration boards to have a relationship with a client. And I am a therapist. While a psychologist should not be telling you what to think or how to behave, it is a position that has power or authority, partly due to the dynamics of therapy and partly because that's usually the case in a helping profession role.
Best guess is her boyfriend was coming to meet her at the bar