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Yeah I wonder the same.
But why is there a need to fantasize? I have a very hot time understanding this. Genuinely asking to try and understand.
That's why I don't want to push her to do it. For now I'm expecting her to do it if she really wants to even though that's probably not ganna happen.
It’s normal to have your phone on you 24/7 nowadays.
The question is, is he secretive or protective of his phone?
You’re looking at this wrong. If he was casually hooking up and went no condom with one girl and wore a condom with another, without either one asking for him to wear one, he has more respect for the woman he wore a condom with.
Also, I wouldn’t worry about this other girl. If she is actually hotter than you but he broke it off, it just shows why he was only casually hooking up with her, but wanted a relationship with you.
He’s lying. He was angry and had every intention of hurting you. Literally the only reason to hit someone in anger is to hurt them. Now that he is calm he might regret it but it doesn’t mean he didn’t have intention.
Often times we seek out what is familiar to us because familiarity is comfortable. It sounds like you may be in this cycle. I would recommend getting some therapy so that you can figure out how to get out of the cycle before it escalates.
I’m sorry you’re going through this.
I am also autistic, think OP might be too, and think that regardless he was baiting OP and not respecting her boundaries
He sounds very immature, manipulative, and unpleasant. Apologising in advance for any nastiness isn’t a licence to be as ghastly as possible and avoid any repercussions.
He is responsible for managing his own blood sugar. If he behaves this appallingly and fusses this much whenever he doesn’t have his snack, he really should remember to eat his snack before he leaves the house, or he should carry a small snack with him.
I’m assuming he has a good side too, though he certainly made you run round after him on this occasion.
No-one reading this account would blame you if you decided being disrespected and blamed for someone else’s bad choices was the final straw.
If you do want to stick with him, I would suggest you sit him down and tell him that the way he behaves when he’s hungry is unacceptable. That he is responsible for eating a snack or carrying a snack with him. And that next time he plays up line that, you are going to stand up and leave him to it.
Then follow through. Don’t run round after him, don’t ask if he has had his snack or if he has it with him. He’s not a child, this is either a blood sugar issue or a big old excuse to treat you like dirt in public. Either way he remembers his snack or he doesn’t. And if he kicks off again at the next restaurant, then you quietly pick up your things, stand up, and leave. You don’t need to say a thing, just leave him to have his tantrum without an audience he can push into feeling guilty.
I’m really sorry he thinks it’s ok to treat you like this. I guarantee you deserve better. You sound very kind, caring, and thoughtful. Take care.
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Tell him
If the relationship is new and you already figured out that you are not compatible, instead of trying to change that much you should break up and look for partners that are compatible with you.
As I stated in the original post, I already talked to him about that. The bigger concern now is that he outed me, which I don’t think is acceptable for any reason. I am looking for advice on how to have a productive conversation with him about that.
Dating for 8 months and she never mentioned she likes to swim very hot? Seems like something she’d want to do with you. I’m calling bullshit on this story.
What if OP’s girlfriend was bisexual? Would she have to quit hockey???
Wait, how is that so? I scroll reddit almost all day and see many posts of women hating every man who makes a statement similar to what this gir said about guys. Doesn't this prove that hating such people is right?
From my perspective reading this I have no idea what he is supposed to do more. And that’s exactly how he probably will feel.
How in the world does he make it romantic when reassuring YET AGAIN that he wants kids with you?
I am super confused what you really want from him? Being more romantic is such a wide definition already but you said you want him to be more romantic in talking babies with you?
No mention of mom… is dad one of the 40%?
her not being happy with me and wanting to explore her bisexuality
These two things are not necessarily linked together. This is like saying you wanting to go out to eat means you don't like her cooking.
Sounds like she's feeling out how you feel about this. So if you've ever found another woman attractive does that mean your wife should not trust you?
Next time, respond by call him micro weenie! That will take care of the situation permanently.
Do not apologize. She is not a feminist, and if she wants to claim it, then she’s an awful one that gives other feminists a bad reputation. It was your choice to have an arranged marriage, and you and your husband are happy and satisfied with your marriage, and that’s the main thing. Find better friends – you deserve better than her.
I’m against the grain here but it isn’t even the snooping (though I totally understand that’s a deal breaker for many alone) it’s how she WOKE you up over OLD message threads to interrogate you about them. That’s extremely disrespectful and strange. I think I’d end the relationship here…if she is displaying behavior like this 6 months in…
You can try partner kink questionnaires like MojoUpgrade or quivre to find where you both are compatible! That may or may not work for you, but it’s a suggestion!
Learning about her pleasures while exposing your desires can feel very vulnerable. However if both partners are open to it and totally non judgmental and honest with each other, it can lead to electrically charged conversations and so on 🙂
Thank you so much!
since I moved here for his job, I don't have one. It's pretty much impossible to find a job when you don't speak the native language.
Why is this even a question. Why are you even entertaining this? Are you wanting to get back with her or something? She would only get laughing emoji’s from me.
She also know that some male friends is flirting with her in chat. I don't told to block Evey male friends, but some male friends are really flirting with her and then I said to block them.
My (25f) partner (30m) keeps telling me he doesn't want me to gain weight.
He sounds immature. A successful relationship takes place between people, not bodies. If he's not ready to have a successful relationship, well, he has that right… But maybe you should oblige him.
Who hurt you?
You feel like he’s was using you for your car because he is.
He’s 27 and acting like a 7 year old.
Technically anybody could be vaccinated, but they mostly give up on older folks and males because the risk is minimal, or the symptoms don't really apply.
I (M, at the time mid-thirties) did get a prescription for Gardasil 9 as a precaution after a routine STI screening (new partner; wanted to ensure that we remained safe), but at $200/shot with a 3-shot schedule, I made the choice not to bother because I didn't have the money at the time.
Nah man. Relationship has run its course. You don’t have to hate her, but she did you dirty. I’d break off all communication for awhile- it will help you get over it. You’ve been friends for most of your lives so you definitely need a new routine. Hang out with friends. Join a gym or a club. Meet some new people. You will find yourself missing her less and less. Good luck
I think it's more because I've been cheated on in the past and turned a blind eye in total stupidity which led me to waste so much time! I would rather be suspicious and aware then stupid! At least I know now and not later. I don't want to waste any more time. Thank you for your insight because you are absolutely right!
I have been in this situation before but what is strange to me is my girlfriend and I were like 20 when it happened. Does it feel like she regressed in maturity a considerable amount after the pandemic? Because for me at least I could blame her behavior on her age causing desperation, and mixed with an inability to cope.
its very common with girls honestly! sharing beds is a friend thing among a lot of them tbh
Yeah two things. He should not have left you to deal with the the person fighting. and
His actions were many orders of magnitude worse that what he is causing you of.
Take all this as a gift and get an annulment because something tells me you would have a miserable marriage to this person. He is showing you who he is so pay attention
He should have told you. If they have the same core friend group I can understand situations like this but I would not be ok with him hanging out with her still.
Well you’re seeing why getting married so quickly is a bad idea. He never would have made it to marriage without rushing it. Not a great guy.
I think it’s great you’re realizing this so young though. I didn’t. Wasted ten years. You can get out of this early and find someone who appreciates ya with very little time lost.
Get rid of him. You’ll find someone who wants to try. That’s like the bare minimum.
No no, sometimes you have to be that way with people in order for them to see straight and you definitely hit a nerve, but the right one ?
Thank you
I mean, she is being paid to play a role. If you have a friendship of sorts, remember that a large part of it is because someone is paying her to be nice to you. That said, however rare, sometimes relationships do bud from these sorts of interactions. There's two real options as I see it, either 1) just be forward and give her your number, which doesn't seem like your wheelhouse or 2) talk to her more and more until you actually know each other a little bit and then build from there
Is there a man shortage? Girl, cut your losses and run.
She seems to be the kind of person who has been forgetful and flighty for so long that it’s just who she is and who she knows people know and expect her to be. But if you’re still into her say something like I’m still upset you broke our date, but not enough to wait another month, what are you doing tonight?
slightly unhinged and ignorant.
slightly? Like Hitler was slightly against the Jews, Masons, Romany, gays, communists, the left etc…?
I would never date someone who had any previous relationship with my sister. If I found out my SO did and kept it from me, I would never be able to trust them again.
Ok if you really want to be pedantic then >95%. My point stands. It is very, very rare that people are just fine finding out that their wife fucked their brother nearly a decade after marrying them.
I guess I’m just looking for advice on what to do?
I was in your shoes when I was 20 (30 to, but much different situation). I'll give you the best advice I ever got that I ignored like an idiot until I was 30.
I’m not sure when the time would be to move on and start talking to other girls.
Don't. Take all that energy you spend thinking about girls to the gym and to your job. You're 20, women will always be around and if you do things right and set yourself up for success, you won't have to worry about talking to girls. I'm not saying don't meet girls and online your life, just don't make it the focus. They'll just hunt you down. I was dumb….didn't get on the path until I was 30 after a tragedy and by the time I was 35, my life was wildly different. Start now, and 25 to 30 year old you will thank you.
What in the Dirty John is this guy!? Glad you figured him out, OP!
The longer you stay the more likely it is that you’ll end up having to pay her alimony since she did want work. You should at least consult a divorce attorney.
Surely you can appeal to her common sense? Like, how you simply don't have wall space to hang any more?
??
OP, THE PASTOR, IS PROTECTING HIS IMGANGINE PLAN AND SIMPLE.
Divorce or it will only continue to grow, and you will end up being labeled a terrible person because they will flip this situation and make you look like the bad guy. Small religious towns always do this and the Pastor is only looking out for himself and his family's image. He will turn against you