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Couldnt agree more. Most people here are going to say to ditch him, but that is glossing over the fact that these are VERY typical problems when living with someone. They just moved way too fast.
However, I can understand why OP might be playing the long game here. If she can tie up a potential doctor, it could play out well for her and her kids once the money starts rolling in……
Tough one, really could go either way. I'd say yellow flag, proceed with caution. Obviously it's your sister's call what she's comfortable with, though. It's perfectly fair for this amount of debt to be a dealbreaker.
Goin on a vacation with your ex if frikkin weird…
Don’t know why ur downvoted because you’re right
Yeah OP jesus.. they often blame that behavior on the alcohol and i wasn't myself and i don't remember doing it so I'm sorry i guess..
My uncle used the same excuses on my aunt. And one night he just got so annoyed during an argument he hit her against the head. She went to bed and never woke up again.
Just because you are a man doesn't make this behavior any better. Jesus she hit you and then spat at you.
Alcohol doesn't make it okay! I've gotten plenty blackout drunk before and never got violent with my partners or anyone for that matter.
Please know this isn't okay! Just because there was a first time doesn't mean it's right. They always follow up with more of the same behavior if you let it slide and stay with a person that could do this.
No matter what argument, antagonizing behavior, shouting, disagreement.
THERE IS NEVER AN EXCUSE FOR PUTTING YOUR HANDS ON YOUR SO!
I appreciate that point of view!
A psych hold is not extreme if someone is experiencing a genuine mental health emergency, which this is if you truly believe she is experiencing delusions at the level you are saying. If she has never experienced delusions before, either there is a serious underlying mental health condition that is presenting itself or there's something neurological going on. People don't just start believing they are magic because of low self-esteem.
Like I said, you can't convince someone their delusions are not real. They will only dig in further because you are challenging their reality. Psychological delusions are not a “talk it out” issue, they are a “my partner is having a break from reality” issue. The only thing to do if that's the case is aggressively pursue treatment as soon as possible.
I would stack my coins and buy it myself if you could do it that way
She's still acting like a child. You deserve better. Everyone has their own interests, and yours isn't any less important than hers.
To put it simply, you were not at fault. You did not cheat. Cheating is a conscious decision made by the person. You were drugged, you did not gave consent. You were unconscious and was raped.
I believed the perpetrator slipped in a higher amount of Xanax than you had previously consumed. Make a police report.
Whether your bf wants to stay or leave you is entirely up to him. If he can't find it in his heart to understand that you had been raped and you need his support now more than ever, then maybe he is not that right for you at all.
Oh yeah, stop sleeping with her immediately.
So, my wife and I don't have much in common, but we do make a point to be involved in eachothers life. You can't expect your partner to just hang out by himself all the time just because he is doing stuff you aren't into. You don't have to be there for every little thing, but it sounds like this friend is giving him more consideration than you are.
I can see why you feel self-conscious about it, but if you force him to isolate himself because you literally don't want to spend time with him, then maybe you should just break up?
You are in a very short relationship with a younger girl with depression and consider yourself a hostage to the very textbook comments she makes.. okay. We’ve all been there in some minute way. My advice is to end it she will literally will move on if you properly exit and reasonably disappear after that. I think you already know. Also don’t just ghost, explain fully and honestly and that you aren’t the one she actually needs
Communication is your only option.
omg what is with 20-somethings getting with people old enough to be their parents? this is the third one in this sub today!!!
So, bear with me while I make a point. I have low self-steem. I usually say bad things about myself, I think I fail frequently, I’m very harsh with my mistakes, I think I’m fat and ugly. I’ve been working with my therapist to solve this, BUT whenever someone is rude with me or says something along the lines of what I say to myself, it’s extra very hot to be angry and demand to be treated properly because deep down I agree with them, and with the bad things they said.
My point is: you have insecurities and bad thoughts about yourself, which is normal, everyone does in some level, BUT he knows that and he uses that against you, he knows you’ll have trouble recognizing his assholery for what it is if he insults you using the bad things you already think or worry about yourself.
He’s a dick. That’s manipulative, hurtful and mean. Nothing justifies these comments he made. You were being kind, caring for him, and he insulted you.
My guess is, as others have said, you would have less issues orgasming with a partner who treated you better, who made you feel cared for, loved and safe.
You’ve only been with this waste of space for 5 months, please break up now.
Look, I like dogs, but am not what you'd call a dog person. I have kids and I don't like the idea of keeping a dog in such a small apartment, so I don't have a dog. I can't handle the demands of basically another child. So please listen when I tell you this, CHOOSE THE DAMN DOG over the guy.
This guy won't tell his kids to be gentle with your pup because he doesn't care. You have to be your pup's advocate. 8lb dog at 5yrs old, that dog is not getting bigger, you need to protect her. Don't let this man come into your life after he failed his marriage, and let him tell you how to on-line your life properly. Sorry, but not even fully divorced and he's “in love” after 5months? No he's not. He wouldn't try to control your relationship with your dog if he had any respect for you. If he loved you, he would respect your dog in your home. Kick the guy to the curb. You know that if you gave up your pup for this man that the next things he tries to control is where you go and who you talk to. He's dropping red flags all over, don't ignore the signs.
Then you are choosing to waste the rest of your life to the benefit of someone who doesn't appreciate you.
There is no advice to get here, if you are accepting this you are dooming yourself to either falling ill or drag your feet for years until you finally break.
You should not move in with him. He didn’t just bring up a problem in your relationship, he told you you’re not good enough and he wants you to not only change with exercise but also get surgery. He chose to bring it up in a way to tear you down and destroy your self-confidence. Honestly, i don’t see how you can resolve this by anyrhing other than ending it. Do you really want to date someone who is not attracted to you and who makes you feel shitty about yourself? I’m telling you this as someone in a healthy relationship so you know it’s possible: you deserve someone who makes you feel beautiful and desired. You shouldn’t settle for this kind of behaviour and treatment. A man who is really into you and in love with you will be obsessed with you, he will not let an opportunity pass him to touch your butt, hold your boobs, sneak in a kiss, you will catch him looking at you because he just can’t help himself, etc. And while you should bring up issues in a relationship what your boyfriend did is not healthy communication. As i said all he’s doing is tearing you down. He should have never dated you in the first place. Don’t settle just to not be single.
She's from Europe though, it's unlikely it matters that much to her
You are over thinking. It is very likely that B has not thought about you or what happened for many years. Unless B has recently mentioned that she was still hurt by this break up, you reaching out to apologize 12 years after an only 2 week long relationship will make you seem like an absolute lunatic. Get some therapy as it appears you are the only one who needs to let go of this.
Perhaps you are the one who wished things would have worked out with her and pretending you need to apologize to her is so you can hear from her how she missed you all this time and wished things had been different. You said you 2 went no contact after the break up. Is your ego bruised that she did not chase you and you need to know that she still desired you at least or that she was hurt so you can get some sense of self worth from her? Or… get some therapy and drop this ridiculous, self centered desire from your mind.
You've involved that poor girl in a situation that she did not agree too. You should tell her. She is still with that guy because she thinks he is faithful etc, and he is not.
Personally I wouldn't be friends with you after this, so here's hoping your friend is more morally corrupt than I am.
Ask your friends and family what they think of that. ??????
That implies that she is the authority in the marriage does it not??
Don’t ever say “ I really like you” so up front !!!! Just ask her out like if “ I was wondering if you are free next week to go for ”
Don’t ask open ended question like “sometime”.
Remember that people say yes when the environment and atmosphere is nice. So find a setting to ask her out in, like a group outing where she and you be talking lots and you can ask her then,
Obviously don’t go asking her if she is like studying for exams or something
I also wanted to add that he feels like the dates we go on are typically my idea and that’s why he feels like he shouldn’t pay as much but I feel like we mutually agree to go out.
She did, didn’t she? And when he didn’t stay there, she leveled it up.
her actions shattered all trust you have with her. i would dump her because she definitely cheated on you.
To quote the meme: she belongs to the streets.