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Actually it's not that easy to ask all the time. There's a line where you begin to invade the other person's personal space and question their integrity plus not everyone has that confidence anyway.
You have to ask a woman twice if she was serious but i guess you already know that
It's indoctrination, and can be heavy.
It may be hard to imagine, but a lot of the people we in the US see as foreigners and might be a bit racist to will return the favor, and to a super concerning degree. Autonomy and self respect mean very little when you grow up under a value system that gets close to eugenics and segregation
Yeahh, thank youu! :))
Talk to him about it. You will feel much better afterwards.
Mmmm no. He sounds like an ass hole. He can certainly let you know his preference- but that’s about it. It’s YOUR body and you don’t have to justify what you do with YOUR body to anyone.
Break up with him.
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All. Of. THIS
Don’t be so sure that you’ll “never be the person who checks his phone”. Women who do that are necessarily “crazy”. Being with a man who cheats (or a person who cheats, it’s not a gendered thing) will turn you into a person you don’t recognize. Knowing that something is off but being lied too and gaslit about reality will mess with your head like nothing else. When the trust is gone you start to lose pieces of yourself. Now that you know that he’s capable of doing this and never letting on to you, your relationship will never be the same. I’m not telling you to leave because I sense that you’re not ready to do that yet, but I do want you to be prepared for what this lack of trust and his lying will do to your mind.
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This is the moment where you make decisions. Hard ones but the ones you need to do. You can not force your girlfriend to stop talking to an ex but you can ask her, respectfully and assertive to stop and tell her that this is non-negotiable. You explain that you need to have that ex out of your life and if your current girl is not on the same page with you, shes not good for you anyway.
Step up bro. You dont need this shit.
So I should just nuke the relationship without even trying to talk about it? Doesnt seem right.
No idea. I know my wife certainly doesn't care if there are women in the locker room on my hockey team.
All you can do is sit, wait and be prepared to answer any and all questions including show her your phone with the threats from EE (Evil Ex).
Is it over? Who knows. You don't know what EE is saying and you don't know how GF is going to respond in the interim. Just be ready to be open, honest and ready to communicate your heart out.
I think that the problem is not about women per se. I think the problem is that you found yourself dating a selfish arsehole.
And that's all there is to it.
Enjoy your freedom and now keep an eye out for similar personality traits and if you find them in a prospective partner, run.
Can you explain what I've been projecting? And no, that wasn't my intention. I wanted to be honest with her and myself, for the sake of our friendship.
I didn't think we could continue to have a normal friendship if I didn't come clean with her And I don't want to be a bad person, so what do you think I should have done differently?
Good luck. First step is to get paternity established before you sign the birth certificate. Odds are the child isn't yours based on your story. But, you'll have an uphill battle getting full custody unless the child's mother abandons it to you like my ex did with ours.
Thanks!!
Get an annulment if you still can
Cheated before and after the wedding – damn
If you really want to suffer a bit more then try and make this work outside of marriage where there is less to lose
Then when you are done suffering just move on.
This isn't about yogurt
My brother in Christ it's been 9 months you still getting to know each other and really figure out how to get the other one there.
Keep communicating keep experimenting and then who knows where your sex life is going to go but you haven't even reached a year in this relationship like you've got room for activities my friend
Tbh i was about to comment not to chain yourself to a family that stipulates such stiff with an apartment on their grounds
It's a compliment…like a porcelain doll…beautiful ,pure and innocent. Just using that as an example.
Make sure to protect yourself as far as contraception. It would be cheating if you're not open to opening the relationship. Protect yourself, OP.
He’s an adult not a child. Nothing is predatory about this. But that’s your opinion. I’m only saying to mind your business because this post isn’t about our age. But you can believe what you want.
I’m 23 and I’m an engineer. There are a lot of 23 year old engineers. Most people graduate college at 22 or 23 so it makes sense.
OP, that must hurt to receive. I’m so sorry! I don’t think I would personally be able to continue.. but this is your relationship, not mine! I suggest therapy and what your older self might say
Friend, you are missing something ❤️maybe reread the post once more
I'll admit I start to lose a lot of sympathy for people when they just blow by a million red flags on their way to marriage and children. Like who knew this wouldn't work out?! No warning at all!
Wtf is wrong with you
I’m a bartender and I’d be mad af if someone did that to me
Have you? Because I'd love to see how you would go about this situation.
Shit, can I borrow 150k from his brother
Don’t go backwards. Go forward.
Unless all of the problems you had before are gone they’re still problems they just don’t bother you at the moment.
Sociopath as per his label, he doesn’t like the guy for breaking up a friend group yrs ago by cheating, doesn’t make someone a sociopath
Soooo maybe not for short term thinking….but this might be a sticking point for compatibility down the line if you plan to raise kids together. I’ve seen vegan/non vegan relationships work if neither expects the other to change their diet,but it’s a whole different thing when it comes to kids because it has to be a joint decision
He's been manipulating you this entire time.
Last time I tried to have a conversation about it, he threatened to kill himself
This is a classic emotional manipulation. You are not responsible for someone else's actions, and you cannot make or break someone's life. Leave him, and if he threatens this again, then contact emergency services and tell them he is in danger of taking his own life.
My abusive ex always threatened to kill himself if I left him. Guess what, it's been years and the bastard is still alive.