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She's both shown and told you her intentions and that she has ulterior motives. I would send a message about her disrespectful behaviour, I would also ask your partner to do the same, but in your message I would try to focus on ways aside from your relationship in which she has been disrespectful so she doesn't try and just make you seem jealous.
Look into love bombing. A lot of toxic people, consciously or not, tend to enter new relationships excessively positive and quick to push the dynamic as deep as they can as quickly as possible. Then by the time that initial burst of energy wares off, the honeymoon period ends so to speak, the dynamic is deep enough and there is enough nostalgia that they can ride that as they get increasingly manipulative. I suspect you may find that resonates with your experiences with him.
She's both shown and told you her intentions and that she has ulterior motives. I would send a message about her disrespectful behaviour, I would also ask your partner to do the same, but in your message I would try to focus on ways aside from your relationship in which she has been disrespectful so she doesn't try and just make you seem jealous.
Look into love bombing. A lot of toxic people, consciously or not, tend to enter new relationships excessively positive and quick to push the dynamic as deep as they can as quickly as possible. Then by the time that initial burst of energy wares off, the honeymoon period ends so to speak, the dynamic is deep enough and there is enough nostalgia that they can ride that as they get increasingly manipulative. I suspect you may find that resonates with your experiences with him.