37 thoughts on “Thicc-tattooed-bitch online webcams for YOU!”
Is that what he’s worried about? That you’re going to “embarrass” him by suddenly talking about the plot of a “fluffy” novel in front of his friends/colleagues?
He’s known you long enough by now to know you are not going to do that.
I have a senior finance position and have to deal with/socialise with a lot of snobby people. I also like to watch sop operas to relax, but I have the emotional intelligence to know that if someone is talking to me about Plato, Im not going to start telling them about soap opera or lines lol.
You can ask him but if he’s not comfortable with it that has to be ok, too. I personally wouldn’t be ok with doing this with someone I’ve known for 5 months.
I know a lot of people are saying to just cut your losses but it’s a lot easier said than done especially after so many years having your lives entangled. It’s a really very hot position to be in on both ends, and honestly the best bet is probably couples counseling to try and tackle a possible way over it together because unless he’s been having an emotional affair, developing feelings for someone you’re close with but in a relationship with someone else isn’t unheard of and won’t be the first or last time it happens to anyone.
I would start with therapy for just you. Not couples counseling yet. First, I would get some validation from an outside source if this is a healthy relationship and you are otherwise doing well, and then, if you and your therapist agree, you can get couples counseling. If the relationship is actually abusive, you do not want to get couples counseling, because that just teaches abusive partners new and sophisticated ways of abusing.
Your husband may want to just pretend it never happened. That won't be possible. Or he may want to talk through each point. I would just take the time you need to absorb what happened. If you have good friends or family you are close to, they may be helpful sources of support.
Unfortunately OP finally admitted what she’s doing that is causing the strife… she has asked him to stop transitioning to appease her parents and grandparents because they’ll know and it will be very hot according to her.
Unfortunately she is being transphobic but Is so caught up in silently violently she doesn’t realize it
So a little back story, I've pretty much handled everything since we've been together. So much in fact that 2 years ago her parents almost passed in a car accident. I took a month off from work to take care of them at night while she took care of them during the day. Her parents have no money coming in and will be broke at the end of this year. So I'm sure shes stressed about that.Her explanation to me was if I'm there, she knows she'll just depend on me like always and she won't progress with where she wants to be in life.
Why should he feel “cheated” out of someone he was never with? If she was interested it would be a clear yes. This is the kind of entitlement that women are allowed to avoid because it ends in anger directed at them.
I have took a moment and I have thought about this. Did you read the part where I have said that I am aware of how I have treated him? And that was one of the many reasons why I decided to get help with my unsolved issues? I know that I have treated him poorly this me being self aware of my behavior. This is why I mentioned I have been going to therapy. Because I know that I have unsolved issues but that I wanted to get help. So that I wouldn't treat him badly anymore.
I have a daughter and I am absolutely teaching her to lie in these situations if she feels unsafe. Her life and safety are more important than some guys entitled feelings everytime.
Or, you can cut this lying cheater out of your life and walk away happier. Asking for accountability from this man just means you’re still hung up about having a relationship with him. If it’s over then just walk away.
When you look at relationships like a fantasy then you really cannot have a healthy one.
She doesn’t want you for (reasons). So no. That’s not stability.
You don’t have to want one at the moment but saying never is childish. It means you were too immature to actually have a healthy relationship. If you can’t acknowledge her flaws then you are the wrong person for her. She’s not perfect. A perfect person does not exist and would not leave you.
Yeah mate she never would, she is not that type of girl, etc. do you think every man that got cheated on knowingly married a woman thinking “you know, i think she may or may not. Im not sure, but I can see it happening”
EVERYONE thinks their partner wouldnt cheat on them. Thats why cheating can be so devastating, people dont expect it from their partner.
And unless her parents are 24/7 guarding her whereabouts you really dont know what she will do in this month long “separation”
Dude, he’s never going to admit it because he has successfully been gaslighting you into staying. It’s like the Shaggy song “It Wasn’t Me.” Except it seems like your husband gets off on you catching him and being able to gaslight you into staying.
If he doesn’t want to be called a bad person, then he shouldn’t be a bad person.
Quit joking about this woman’s near rape. Quit sexualizing everything she says or does. Seriously, if you joke around about rape then you aren’t the good guy. Mr. Sensitive also clearly doesn’t care about her feelings, which is really hypocritical. Sorry if the truth hurts your bfs sensitive little feelings, but actions have consequences and he has earned his.
Also, I would dump a man this misogynistic. He will turn it on you someday.
Great advice in here so far, I don’t think that age gap is bad. If you were 21 or 22 I’d be concerned but at 25 I feel everything evens out and we’re all adults now. Sounds like you like this man so go for it.
I would never dump on OP. He’s entitled to his opinion and I’m glad he’s happy. You also have no idea what my opinion is on getting serious with past sex workers. That’s not the issue here.
I can come up with scenarios all day long and we can find out where your boundaries are. You initially said nothing from the past matters. Then you said “well rapists have a high repeat rate, so yes the past matters now”. Now we have gotten to the point where predatory behavior from the past matters, regardless if it’s illegal.
While you keep changing where your line is in real time, I would just like you to consider the possibility that not everyone will agree with you, regardless of where your line ends up.
I agree. But the fact that they weren't following eachother, now are, and that she's liking his posts makes me feel weird. Because he really hurt her by dumping her for his ex. So the fact that they've reconnected and are interacting on social media weirds me out
I just see incompatible people. Some of her hostility I can understand (I grew up in the south and a lot of your hobbies are triggers for me) but that just means she shouldn’t be in a relationship with someone who has those hobbies.
Love isn’t enough to build a happy, loving home. Trust, honesty, and respect are the fuel that keeps love alive. Without them, no relationship can survive. She doesn’t respect you or your hobbies and it is breeding resentment.
That resentment will be what ends the relationship you can either see the writing on the wall or you can wait until the breaking point.
I’m really glad you are an empowered woman and called out your (gross) boyfriend about this. Honestly I’d dump any man who casually talks about a r*pe attempt and doesn’t hold the predator accountable. And then to KEEP sexually harassing her?
I mean, if you online in the USA she could sue the company and your boyfriend for his “reactions”
He’s not 14. He needs to do better. Maybe dumping him would help him realize how unacceptable he is being.
He needs to apologize to the WOMAN he shared the office with and is harrassing.
My partner and I are similar with a four year age gap, but you still understand this is a big red flag if she can’t see how what she did is wrong and dangerous.
Why are you with someone who hates everything you do? Find a person who enjoys at least some of the things you do. You don’t have to participate to be supportive – she’s not even willing to just let you do your thing. She’s not ever going to be ok with you doing the things she sees as beneath her and why should you have to give up everything you enjoy?
He didn’t forget. If you take anything else away from these posts please take that, because he absolutely did not forget and you need to examine this incident in that light.
There is no going back. You can not be just friends after crossing a line. Accept it and move on. You did this to yourself by making crappy decisions to cheat with your friend. You should have respected her marriage.
Is that what he’s worried about? That you’re going to “embarrass” him by suddenly talking about the plot of a “fluffy” novel in front of his friends/colleagues?
He’s known you long enough by now to know you are not going to do that.
I have a senior finance position and have to deal with/socialise with a lot of snobby people. I also like to watch sop operas to relax, but I have the emotional intelligence to know that if someone is talking to me about Plato, Im not going to start telling them about soap opera or lines lol.
I mean.. why would he admit anything to a door mat?
You are correct. It’s not a major drama and the fact that he is creating major drama is actually scary.
Because he’s an over-educated idiot.
You should stay. Yolo.
You can ask him but if he’s not comfortable with it that has to be ok, too. I personally wouldn’t be ok with doing this with someone I’ve known for 5 months.
I know a lot of people are saying to just cut your losses but it’s a lot easier said than done especially after so many years having your lives entangled. It’s a really very hot position to be in on both ends, and honestly the best bet is probably couples counseling to try and tackle a possible way over it together because unless he’s been having an emotional affair, developing feelings for someone you’re close with but in a relationship with someone else isn’t unheard of and won’t be the first or last time it happens to anyone.
I would start with therapy for just you. Not couples counseling yet. First, I would get some validation from an outside source if this is a healthy relationship and you are otherwise doing well, and then, if you and your therapist agree, you can get couples counseling. If the relationship is actually abusive, you do not want to get couples counseling, because that just teaches abusive partners new and sophisticated ways of abusing.
Your husband may want to just pretend it never happened. That won't be possible. Or he may want to talk through each point. I would just take the time you need to absorb what happened. If you have good friends or family you are close to, they may be helpful sources of support.
Good luck, OP. That sounds very upsetting.
I’m glad, best of luck for you, do your best to move forward and let it go because I think it’s time to have the relationship you deserve
Unfortunately OP finally admitted what she’s doing that is causing the strife… she has asked him to stop transitioning to appease her parents and grandparents because they’ll know and it will be very hot according to her.
Unfortunately she is being transphobic but Is so caught up in silently violently she doesn’t realize it
So a little back story, I've pretty much handled everything since we've been together. So much in fact that 2 years ago her parents almost passed in a car accident. I took a month off from work to take care of them at night while she took care of them during the day. Her parents have no money coming in and will be broke at the end of this year. So I'm sure shes stressed about that.Her explanation to me was if I'm there, she knows she'll just depend on me like always and she won't progress with where she wants to be in life.
Leave. End of long story. Do not tolerate disrespect, being drunk removes the filter but she wanted to hit you so she did.
he’ll just feel cheated (rightfully so)
Why should he feel “cheated” out of someone he was never with? If she was interested it would be a clear yes. This is the kind of entitlement that women are allowed to avoid because it ends in anger directed at them.
I have took a moment and I have thought about this. Did you read the part where I have said that I am aware of how I have treated him? And that was one of the many reasons why I decided to get help with my unsolved issues? I know that I have treated him poorly this me being self aware of my behavior. This is why I mentioned I have been going to therapy. Because I know that I have unsolved issues but that I wanted to get help. So that I wouldn't treat him badly anymore.
I have a daughter and I am absolutely teaching her to lie in these situations if she feels unsafe. Her life and safety are more important than some guys entitled feelings everytime.
Or, you can cut this lying cheater out of your life and walk away happier. Asking for accountability from this man just means you’re still hung up about having a relationship with him. If it’s over then just walk away.
This is horrible advice. She's not interested in anal.
He can’t cheat on her if she isn’t his girlfriend. She’s letting him cheat.
What do you want moving forward?
That is part of the problem.
When you look at relationships like a fantasy then you really cannot have a healthy one.
She doesn’t want you for (reasons). So no. That’s not stability.
You don’t have to want one at the moment but saying never is childish. It means you were too immature to actually have a healthy relationship. If you can’t acknowledge her flaws then you are the wrong person for her. She’s not perfect. A perfect person does not exist and would not leave you.
Yeah mate she never would, she is not that type of girl, etc. do you think every man that got cheated on knowingly married a woman thinking “you know, i think she may or may not. Im not sure, but I can see it happening”
EVERYONE thinks their partner wouldnt cheat on them. Thats why cheating can be so devastating, people dont expect it from their partner.
And unless her parents are 24/7 guarding her whereabouts you really dont know what she will do in this month long “separation”
shE dOsEnt neED yOUr PErmiSsoN tO VApE.
Dude, he’s never going to admit it because he has successfully been gaslighting you into staying. It’s like the Shaggy song “It Wasn’t Me.” Except it seems like your husband gets off on you catching him and being able to gaslight you into staying.
If he doesn’t want to be called a bad person, then he shouldn’t be a bad person.
Quit joking about this woman’s near rape. Quit sexualizing everything she says or does. Seriously, if you joke around about rape then you aren’t the good guy. Mr. Sensitive also clearly doesn’t care about her feelings, which is really hypocritical. Sorry if the truth hurts your bfs sensitive little feelings, but actions have consequences and he has earned his.
Also, I would dump a man this misogynistic. He will turn it on you someday.
My question is, why is he RAMMING anything
Great advice in here so far, I don’t think that age gap is bad. If you were 21 or 22 I’d be concerned but at 25 I feel everything evens out and we’re all adults now. Sounds like you like this man so go for it.
Yeah I’m sure I didn’t get any drinks while we were out. We pregamed and it was just too much for me lol
I would never dump on OP. He’s entitled to his opinion and I’m glad he’s happy. You also have no idea what my opinion is on getting serious with past sex workers. That’s not the issue here.
I can come up with scenarios all day long and we can find out where your boundaries are. You initially said nothing from the past matters. Then you said “well rapists have a high repeat rate, so yes the past matters now”. Now we have gotten to the point where predatory behavior from the past matters, regardless if it’s illegal.
While you keep changing where your line is in real time, I would just like you to consider the possibility that not everyone will agree with you, regardless of where your line ends up.
I agree. But the fact that they weren't following eachother, now are, and that she's liking his posts makes me feel weird. Because he really hurt her by dumping her for his ex. So the fact that they've reconnected and are interacting on social media weirds me out
I just see incompatible people. Some of her hostility I can understand (I grew up in the south and a lot of your hobbies are triggers for me) but that just means she shouldn’t be in a relationship with someone who has those hobbies.
Love isn’t enough to build a happy, loving home. Trust, honesty, and respect are the fuel that keeps love alive. Without them, no relationship can survive. She doesn’t respect you or your hobbies and it is breeding resentment.
That resentment will be what ends the relationship you can either see the writing on the wall or you can wait until the breaking point.
I’m really glad you are an empowered woman and called out your (gross) boyfriend about this. Honestly I’d dump any man who casually talks about a r*pe attempt and doesn’t hold the predator accountable. And then to KEEP sexually harassing her?
I mean, if you online in the USA she could sue the company and your boyfriend for his “reactions”
He’s not 14. He needs to do better. Maybe dumping him would help him realize how unacceptable he is being.
He needs to apologize to the WOMAN he shared the office with and is harrassing.
Kick him out. ? File for divorce, alimony, and child support.
My partner and I are similar with a four year age gap, but you still understand this is a big red flag if she can’t see how what she did is wrong and dangerous.
Dude.
Why are you with someone who hates everything you do? Find a person who enjoys at least some of the things you do. You don’t have to participate to be supportive – she’s not even willing to just let you do your thing. She’s not ever going to be ok with you doing the things she sees as beneath her and why should you have to give up everything you enjoy?
He didn’t forget. If you take anything else away from these posts please take that, because he absolutely did not forget and you need to examine this incident in that light.
There is no going back. You can not be just friends after crossing a line. Accept it and move on. You did this to yourself by making crappy decisions to cheat with your friend. You should have respected her marriage.
You know, sometimes people have more than one child