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My love—this man is threatening to divorce you for being happy. That’s childish at best, selfish at worst.
Do not give up a career that makes you excited. You already did it once, don’t do it again.
Instead of walking on eggshells, call his bluff. Fucking call it.
If he wants to cry divorce, let him. I bet things like this with him have been simmering for a while. It’s time to let them boil over. Don’t allow him the power to steal your happiness any longer.
I wish you luck…?
(And beat him to his divorce. Get your duckies in a row. Be prepared.)
Not my world, but I have poly friends and this sounds pretty normal for a triad sort of relationship. It may be that your brother is involved with Sancho romantically/sexually too. And whether your brother has parental rights will depend where they online – it is possible where I on-line (Ontario) for a child to have more than two legal parents.
Anyway … this sounds very much like your brother's business, and while of course it's natural to care about his well-being, it's not your job to decide if it's too weird or bad for him or whatever.
Let him talk about it all if he wants to, and just listen. If he asks for advice, go for it. But otherwise I'd stay out of it.
Yeah OP if anyone is sexualizing a kid it's him! Thats a child.
I have 3rd graders who I've called cute so many times. I dont have favorites ? but you always have kids who you see personality wise and honestly go “i would absolutely just love if my own kids were that way”
Just either because the kids are super well behaved or funny or just generally really kindhearted.
I tell my husband this all the time. I joke about the dumb things I've heard the little boys and girls in class told me on that day, or if they came and told me they wished i were their age because i was probably a cool kid or honestly just how much i genuinely just love being around them.
Seeing how they grow or making fun of whatever weird outfits they wear to dress up day ?
If my husband tried to make that sexual or call me weird for gushing about literal children…I'd feel gross about him!!!
Like ew. Why the hell is he so insecure? Jealous of a 14yo? Does he think you are one of those creepy teachers who groom kids? I'd be very concerned if he has thoughts like that.
He sounds like a bit of an AH honestly. Does he want you to feel like you should walk on eggshells around the children?